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I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
Hi everyone...I've lurked here and there for awhile and noticed there are some really cool people on this board, so I thought I'd pose this question. I've been dancing for 2.5 years now, 2 years at the top club in my city, and 6 mos now at top club #2. I don't make much at all, and I know I should, cuz I'm young (21) and hot. ;D I make what some folks would at an entry level position, and I know there's more money out there for me to make, but it's just not happening. I've been making $50-100/wk working 2-3days/wk when it should not be hard to leave w/$300 per day. I know part of it has something to do with my energy I put out there, but even when I'm in a good mood, I can barely get on these guys' radar. I'm burnt out from trying so hard (doubting myself, crying, and feeling depressed), I have no clue how to hustle ( I thought I did, but money's so sporadic for me, I'm starting to thinking those few good days/nites were just blind luck...), and I am finishing college this summer, and planned to move out-of-state to go to grad school, but can't b/c I haven't made enough to save a dime for the trip. There's a lot going on here (issues w/dancing, my dad not knowing what I do, and regular everyday stressors) so I just wanna put some of this out there, and see what you guyz think a/b it for starters. What do I need to do? Stop dancing (as I don't think I am cut out for it), change clubs, or just try a new approach? Thanks a lot!
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
You mentioned two qualities that could be to your advantage.. Young.. and Hot. What exactly are you putting your energy into though? If you are just walking around trying to get the guys to notice your looks... that may be why. After giving a customer (or few )some sexy attention during your stage show, you should sit down and let a little of your personality shine through with your looks.(Perhaps for a song or two...depending on the hustle enviroment.) If you are doing this.... and then getting declined for a dance then im not sure??? Just make sure to be friendly and personable since looks only get you so far sometimes.Good luck!
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
Thanks for replying, Silky!
I went to work today, and turned my energy around a bit, working more on how I present myself to the customer when we interract, versus just waiting them to come to me, and got fairly good results...But, just not enough guys responded for a high sales day:( so I'm thinking it was just a slow day. I plan on getting on the night shift here and there and see if that makes a difference. At my first club I was on nite shift, but now I am on day. I like the hours, but everyone needs regulars to bank on dayshift. Maybe that's the issue completely? What do you all think?/:O
Thanks!
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
If your plan is to get regulars and work day, then stay on day shift and talk to every new guy that walks in the door. I wanted to work days, but I gave up because they were too slow. When a club is slow, I don't feel motivated to even talk to the few guys that are there. Maybe that is your problem, it's not that you don't have energy, but you're not motivated. Try working nights, I have met a lot of guys on nights who say that would like to come to see me again, but the best time for them is on days. You also want to make sure with the guys you agree to meet on day, that they spend a good amount of money! Because you don't want to go to work for a whole day and make your usual.
I work at a slow club too, nights are sometimes not all that great. The thing that works out is that I go to school and can work when I want. If it wasn't for my school, I wouldn't be dancing. It's just the best thing out there for college students. Keep trying and be a flirt. Give yourself a date where you expect things to get better, if they don't, move on(to a new club, or another job).
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
i know how you feel, its taken me almost 3 years to figure all that hussle stuff out...thanks to SW mainly, and a good change of attitude.
make a list of things that get you excited...read it if you feel your not amped anough at work.
make another list of goals. decide why your doing what you do for a low wage...why be there making next to nothing-if your going into work, you might as well work and leave with wads of cash ( that was ahrd one for me)
get rid of any inhabitions you may have....make up another character if it helps, pretend to be a totally differnt person then you really are.
maybe cut down your nights too. i used to work 5-6 nights a week...since i cut down to 3 im making just as much, not feeling so burnt out, and able to put %150 effort in to less nights, instead of putting %30 effort into more nights. it doesnt work....
ummm.
hope that helped. if i think of anythign else ill let you know :)
keep smiling too :)
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
hi. i'm in atl too. feb & march are kinda slow months here. i dont know what club ur at, but some clubs the day shift is dead. i would only work days in a bigger club such as pink pony or cheetah, but that's just me. atl is different from working in nyc. if your tipped, this is a sign from the customer to talk to them. also- thanking your customers! this is a big southern hospitality thing. found out about it coming here. talk to your customers! atl is more laid back (smaller clubs are) and the customers like that here. they should ask for dances- unlike working in some places up north where getting dances is like pulling teeth. smiles and eye contact on stage or on the floor. it gets em going!
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
Thanks so much for the advice ladies!
@ julzgulz: I'm gonna review my goals again and figure something out, probably go for the 4-12 shift...Yeah, that's the only reason I am dancing, too, for school, working when I can around classes. I am taking 16 hrs this semester, and have to take 13 over summer. I am graduating on Aug. 6, and the plan is to stop dancing, take a yr. off, and get into my field and gain experience for my grad school application...I thought a/b dancing through grad school but I don't know if I can keep doing this...July will make 3 yrs, and for me it hasn't been worth it, my quality of life sucks b/c I am always so stressed.
@mermaid: Over the summer I'd work crazy amounts of days/week, but once school started I was only able to pull 3/wk. This semester I have 2 days available, as I am in school M-F; everyonce in a while I can do a 1/2 day on Fri, but it's never worth it b/c it's not like I have a regular waiting for me when I get there...But I ask myself all the time "why are you here if you don't make shit?" and I never have an answer...Every few weeks or so, I fill out applications to other 'college student' jobs, but those wages won't do, even though sometimes I feel like it'd still pay more than I'm making now, but I have school, and those sort of jobs don't really work w/your schedule, or they do but cut hrs. and expect you to be okay w/it.
@toxicgirl: The 2 clubs you have mentioned are the clubs I am speaking a/b, LOL! I don't what I am going to do if I have to check out another club, as there isn't much to choose from after you've danced @ the Cheetah and the Pony. IMO, it's down hill from there, and there's nothing but drama w/girls and cheap bastards...
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
where in atlanta do you work? I work in Atlanta too.. I work the day shift also.
Some days I do okay and some days not but It all averages out. Its just tough with so many clubs in the Atlanta area. But the spring and summer are rollin around hang in there.
trinity
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
Hi trinity!
I work @ the Pink Pony, been there 6/7 mos...I started my dancing career @ Cheetah 2yrs or so ago. I imagine you've got some good regulars if you're dayshift and it works for you...I think that's my problem, I'm working the wrong shift to best fit me:)
goddess83
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
Goddess83, don't get depressed anymore. I think its a good idea to try the later shift. That way you may catch the happy hour- getting off work guys. This business can be stressful at time since we go in and never know how much we will make. One thing that helps me when I have not worked for a few days, need a bit of pumping up, or have had a bad day...I go in the the HUSTLE HUTforum and read some of the posts from other girls talking about their tecnique..approaching every guys..stay two songs..ask them for a dance..if they don't want it..move on. Make yourself stay out the dressing room and have your mind set to hustle hard before you walk through the club door. If you catch yourself feeling down at work..perk up and move on. You do this and you will be sucessful.;)
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
Working nights is usually what most college girls do. You don't need regulars to make money, and the volume is a lot higher.
I know what you mean when you don't want to get a different job. The flexibility isn't there llike in dancing. Maybe webcam work would be a good supplement for you?
I also thought that if you aren't getting much in the way dances, how are you at flirting? And I mean over the top kind of throwing yourself at the guys type of flirting? If you are super hot you need to come off as a lot more friendly then an average girl would to make the money. The guys are intimidated by a very hot girl. And if you are shy and afraid to make naughty suggestive comments, you will come off as being a snob. I don't know how many times a shy hot girl has left the club with little to no money when the super flirty average (or even homely) dancer banks.
Maybe even read a little bit on method acting to get some knowlege on how to throw yourself at a guy you would otherwise find not interesting at all.
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
Here's a little trick to help you keep motivated; put a picture of your goal in your locker. So everytime you go to work, you will have a reminder of why you're there. I saw one girl that did just that; it helps her stay focused and also reminds her to SAVE!!! I started doing that this week and I've had my best week EVER!! Maybe it was just luck but I was focused this week like I've never been before. Good luck sweetie.
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
Maybe you're in the wrong club. Maybe you aren't approaching customers enough. regardless, 50-100 a week is VERY BAD money. Especially in Atlanta. There are a number of things you could try...different look, work on your stage show, change shifts, but my guess is you need to work on your hstle. start smiling more, talk to customers more, and be more assertive by asking for dances. Sorry I couldn't be of more help, but the club you mentioned is the same club a friend of mine makes bank at.
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
Hello all!
Thank you all so much for responding, I'm glad I can come here and feel better about my situation...
@amber: I have been dealing w/it all a lot better since I joined SW!
I went to work today and I worked so hard, flirting, smiling, teasing guys w/my...all of me, lol. Left w/ $135 :O I just don't get it. Everything started out so well today...But I don't feel completely devastated b/c a lot of girls were complaining a/b the crowd, and after one of the b-ball games ended(March Madness), stage tipping almost stopped completely! All ogle, no cash.
But I will try again on Wed...a 4-12 shift. I am not sure I am comfortable yet staying till close at this club. I've had customers I don't know at all describe my own car to me...very scary. I have been thinking a/b going back to the Cheetah since I know how nite shift works there.
@Celeste: I think I am going to try that trick of yours. I wanted to buy a car for my b-day, so maybe I'll tape a pic of it to my locker to remind me, LOL!
@Bambi: Does your friend work dayshift?
@Paris: I actually did a little of what you suggested today, but I will try to turn it up on my next shift.
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
A male friend of mine said it best "men love it when they know you're having fun". When I come into work I always have a monetary goal in the back of my mind of how much I want to make for the evening, but I don't let it consume me. Instead, I get out onto the floor with the attitude that I am there to have some fun because I know that when I do this, the money will come to me. When on the floor, I never outwardly seem focused on how much I need to make and believe it or not, this works. Often times after counting my stash I've either made as much or more than I wanted/needed and rarely do I make less and I have never had a regular nor am I a "favorite" who constantly gets called up to VIP. Some of the things that I (and appearantly also the guys) find entertaining:
- I love to make jokes with them. You know, pull their leg a little. If they seem like they've got a sense of humour don't be shy, get ballsy and tease them a little. Guys love a little attitude and it sets you apart from the other dancers. You wouldn't believe how many guys took me to VIP or tipped me extra because of this kind of stuff. Just don't be too offensive, there are some lines you shouldn't cross.
-Sometimes I'll get on the floor with a crazy accent and tell them I'm from some exotic place like South Africa, Australia, GB or Germany. I'll even have a story to go with it. Men love this kind of shit, seriously they will eat it right up AND you'll have fun in the process (ah, it gets contagious). And if they don't believe you? Laugh and switch to your regular voice and tell them you're just messing around, trying to have little fun with them...They will spend money!
-Other times I'll come up with crazy lines to help break the ice (see my thread: Best One Liners Ever in Hustle Hut). They are best used when the place has a good amount of people and I always get a good laugh out of people's reaction to them.
- Finally, I suggest moving to the night shift. Yeah, the house might be slightly higher, but you'll make more because you'll have less down time if any.
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
I think you should take a road trip to DC where there's no hustling only stage. it's a 5 hour drive from ATL. that way you can pick up some money in stage tips to boost your spirits. it won't be 300 a day but it will be more than 50-100 a week and you won't have the stress of hustling!
also at your club you could have a dance goal so that you aren't thinking of counting money but of being out there on the floor selling dances. then you might end up making more than you expect i.e. if your goal is 10 lap dances and you also end up making stage tips
pls keep us posted.
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
@bigblue: I get compliments all the time on how I have such a great personality, I am a sweet, intelligent girl,etc (they just don't think they should pay for it) cuz I'm really such a lame azz! LOL...But yeah back to what you were saying. I do those things, but I'm telling you, dayshift @ this damn club really is like this high school clique that takes years to break into. When I started they said I couldn't do night shift or 4-12 until I wasn't "new" anymore, which meant after a year! I'll be done by then...It's just hard to break the barriers of their "family" of regulars that always spend money...My old club is looking muy bueno right now, since it's niteshift and I could work 3 nites that are ok, rather than 2 days that suck. I'm just nervous to go back.
@lilsweet: I wish I could travel, but I don't think I could do a 5hr drive every week while I am still in school; I am full time (16 hrs this semester) pretty much every week from now till Aug 6 (Graduation!). I gotta learn the ropes here, but thanks for the advice, though.
Hey guys look at some of the old posts on the Pink Pony in Atlanta! That mean lady the girls are talking about is still there (part of the reason I haven't made it to nite shift there yet...) and is still country, LOL!;D
I feel a lot better a/b what I have to do, and the assurance that I don't suck, cuz of the advice on here. Thanks!
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
APPEARANCE
You have to look your best at all times. You are portraying a fantasy. You want to be every part the lady and the seductress. All of your actions and body language will be watched by your next customer, so be positive in every aspect of your work including the way you look and feel.
HAIR: Do something special. Don't just wash and go. Curl it or straighten it. Get the frizz out; get your roots covered up, etc. Use fragrant shampoos and conditioners or scented hairsprays. But don't overboard.
NAILS: Be clean. Take care of any dirt or chipped nail polish. Get manicures and pedicures.
MAKE-UP: This can be tricky. You want to do your makeup darker than usual because the club is pretty dark inside but you don't want to end up like Tammy Fae Baker either!! Do your blush and eyeliner and lipstick a bit darker. Or if you prefer then use a heavy gloss instead of lipstick. Always carry powder for the shiny spots that show up after a heavy dance session in the VIP or onstage.
PERFUME: Use it sparingly. Choose a subtle scent. The last thing a guy wants is to go home to his wife smelling like another woman. So use light scents or body sprays and lotions.
BODY: Go tanning or use a bronzer. It makes a world of difference in the black light. It makes you look healthier. Exercise: You are making money based on appearance so take the time to make sure you look good. Use clear deodorant for sure!! Carry breath mints. "Nuff said.
CLOTHES: This is the fun part of the job! Be creative. Wear stuff that you are comfortable in. Try new colors, experiment with new things. Thigh highs and garters are good accessories. To start off, I suggest getting 2 pairs of shoes, Black and white. They go with everything. Make sure to get slip guards. That is so important! Start off with a low heel (4 inches) until you get used to dancing in them. Get 4 thongs. 2 black and 2 white because they wear out fast since you wash them every night. I would say to start with about 4-6 outfits. Half should match the black and half the white. Pink, white, baby blue, etc. go with white. Black, dark blue, red, etc. go with black. Most girls carry a small purse with them. Wear a nice summer dress not a hillbilly frock dress if you are going to choose a dress, look good but sexy not dressed ready to go to the mall-Think sexy, dress sexy!
MUSIC
Pick music that you are comfortable with but also go with the crowd. If it is mostly older white men then don't bust out with hard core rap. If you got a hip hop crowd then don't start playing country. You are performing for the crowd and generally the more they like the music the more money you will make in the VIP area when you get off the stage. Slow is sexy in any mans eyes.
ATTITUDE
This will make or break you so pay attention!
STAGE: Give lots of eye contact. Smile and wink and make every guy feel as if you are dancing just for him. It makes the guy feel special and he is more willing to tip you if you are having fun. Never look bored or unsure of yourself. Guys like confidence and like a girl who is fun to be around. If you look like you don't want to be there then they won't want to be there with you either and there goes your money.
FLOOR: Before you sit down, always ask if you can join him. He may have another girl he is waiting for. Never order a drink without him offering. It is rude and guys hate it. Always wait for him to ask, but keep in mind if he does ask accept because that’s how the club makes money. Ask his name and ask him about himself. Act interested. Touch his arm and make him feel important. Don't glance around the room or socialize with other girls. Talk to him for at least 2-3 songs before asking for a dance. Always be sure to say thank you for the dance or the drink or whatever. Show respect. You will gain more long term customers this way. After you give a dance always walk with him back to his table to say goodbye and thank you. If he is leaving then escort him to the door. Guys remember that kind of stuff and it makes a big difference. Trust me. No matter how tempting it is, DON’T complain about your night or your problems. Guys come in to get away from that. Don't lie and tell them you need the money for your car, rent, sick kids, etc. Every guy sees through that and it makes you look very bad. Act like a lady and you will get treated like one
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
That was a post from the person called SI Canada,I thought it was very fitting and my girlfriend actually has it hanging in her locker. She used to just walk and go-Now she really looks good when she goes to work,feels good and makes alot of money. Hope it helps.
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
Hey, I just strayed across StripperWeb and I registered just to post my thoughts to you.
I used to dance in ATL I was saving money to go to Law School (which I did) and worked at Pink Pony (and their other clubs) and Oasis.
I know where you are coming from - there were times that I made a ton and many many times I made less than $100 a night. However, if you are making only $50-$100 a week, you need to do some serious thinking about if this is the right place or job for you. It really has little to do with how cute or hot you are. Some people have it in them, some don't. Perhaps your thoughts are just on grad school. I know I had times like that.
Every single thing people have written here is correct. Attitude is everything. You need to find out what attitude works for you to make money. Maybe you are too nice, maybe not friendly enough.
I do know in Atlanta, if you don't thank each person who tipped you on stage, then that can be the kiss of death.
If you want, send me a PM because I am developing a mentor program in Houston (where I live now) for dancers looking for mainstream work that still allows them to dance. I stress people being able to work in a low stress, non-judgmental environment where they don't have to hide what they do. Perhaps I could just give you some suggestions for doing the same thing in Atlanta - especially since I used to live there and have some contacts there.
I worked a regular fuil-time job when I danced and the stress of hiding "my other life" really got to me sometimes. That and the long hours.
Not sure I helped, but I really just wanted to say hello and let you know that I totally understand what you are going through. Best of luck!
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
Quote:
Originally Posted by goddess83
I know part of it has something to do with my energy I put out there, but even when I'm in a good mood, I can barely get on these guys' radar. I'm burnt out from trying so hard (doubting myself, crying, and feeling depressed), I have no clue how to hustle , and I am finishing college this summer, and planned to move out-of-state to go to grad school, but can't b/c I haven't made enough to save a dime for the trip. There's a lot going on here (issues w/dancing, my dad not knowing what I do, and regular everyday stressors) so I just wanna put some of this out there, and see what you guyz think a/b it for starters. What do I need to do? Stop dancing (as I don't think I am cut out for it), change clubs, or just try a new approach? Thanks a lot!
omg! you sound exactly like me! I have the same exact prob. so i know exactly where you are coming from and how you feel. So i decided to move up to a bigger more upscale club. It helped a little. But I have to change too. Sometimes I take a shot to losen myself up. Others times I go to a bathroom stale take a few breaths or pinch myself back to reality and then hey whats the worst that can happen? they say no and i smile and walk away. Think of being a dancer as being an actor playing a role. Play the role appropiate for different ppl and keep asking no matter what. Remember its not you, its them, and you cant be everyone's type so simply ask everyone because the person you least expect could make your day. Good Luck!
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
Thanks mya! And everyone else who replied...:)
Yeah I went to the housemom @ my old club and she said as soon as I get my permit, I can start. She even said if I'm short a little on the $$, she'll run me a tab, lol. So now I just have to keep my sanity together for another couple of weeks to make the $$ for that so that I can make my rent @ my old club, cuz @ this club it's just NOT gonna happen. I have homework mixed w/stress coming @ me from all sides and this current club is just too damn slow. We're not even gonna discuss Easter weekend! >:( But it just pisses me off that they won't even let me work nights here unless the night manager is NOT working, which are days I cannot work b/c I have class super early the next a.m. I wish I could have the daytime mgrs put in a good word for me, b/c the 2 days I work, I am always the first one up, ready to go! Even on Easter Sunday, I was the only girl there for the 1st hr, and got my house fees waived b/c I'm "always dependable"...But I guess that's good enough or WHATERVER...So off I go!
Working nights is really what I need cuz 1) I know how to do that, and 2) I can work more during the week, esp. w/my summer class schedule coming up. I didn't even get to have a Spring Break b/c of all this drama:'( I just want it to get better sooooo bad, you guys...
Thanks for listening (er...reading!)
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Re: I'm just all screwed up! Kind of long, sorry.
It's the slow period in Atlanta right now..... It will pick up a bit after April 15th or so.
I've always used this slow time to regroup...... either taking vacations, extra dance, speech or acting classes. volunteering or taking on temp jos to keep my office skills up.
For me the absolute worst thing to do is to tweak my look. Even if the outcome is fantastic I'd never get a true gauge of the customers response since it's soooooo slow at work. I'll spend the next two-three weeks suntanning in my backyard, spending extra time at the gym, and perfecting my flirting skills. The less time I spend at work, the better for me.