Re: Real life or "on-line"?
Interesting thread.
There's been a recurring rumor on the site over the last six months or so that I don't actually exist (e.g. that my on-line persona is "fake"). ::) I think it's mostly said in fun, though, and it's amusing every time somebody reports it to me. The rumors are their way of gently tweaking me back, I suppose, for what are perceived to be my excessive spending in clubs or my habit of assisting dancers in need, or traveling around the country on visits or perhaps being too accommodating and supportive of the dancers in general. Or maybe they are just bored or dislike me for some other reason.
I'm happy to report that I do exist and most of "who I am" has been validated by dancers on the board who I know IRL. Several dancers have even been to my Virginia house (pictures in Picture Post). But the rumors continue.
Part of this is a tendency to distrust or be healthily suspicious of on-line personas -- after all, look how long we were duped by RoseDelight. So this is a good thing.
Anyway, the difference between real life and our on-line life is that everything you read here is a presentation. Our "presentation" or persona here is completely controlled by each of us. In real life, we control very little of what people may think of us because they are working off their own perceptions and images of our physical, mental, and spiritual selves -- we "control" only very little of that. To put it bluntly, we are more vulnerable in real life.
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
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Originally Posted by The Other Owner
Interesting thread.
There's been a recurring rumor on the site over the last six months or so that I don't actually exist (e.g. that my on-line persona is "fake"). ::) I think it's mostly said in fun, though, and it's amusing every time somebody reports it to me. The rumors are their way of gently tweaking me back, I suppose, for what are perceived to be my excessive spending in clubs or my habit of assisting dancers in need, or traveling around the country on visits or perhaps being too accommodating and supportive of the dancers in general. Or maybe they are just bored or dislike me for some other reason.
I'm happy to report that I do exist and most of "who I am" has been validated by dancers on the board who I know IRL. Several dancers have even been to my Virginia house (pictures in Picture Post). But the rumors continue.
Part of this is a tendency to distrust or be healthily suspicious of on-line personas -- after all, look how long we were duped by RoseDelight. So this is a good thing.
Anyway, the difference between real life and our on-line life is that everything you read here is a presentation. Our "presentation" or persona here is completely controlled by each of us. In real life, we control very little of what people may think of us because they are working off their own perceptions and images of our physical, mental, and spiritual selves -- we "control" only very little of that. To put it bluntly, we are more vulnerable in real life.
Fear not, TOO. A lot of people just don't want to believe that GENTLEMEN really exist. I've never had a doubt that you're real and I just have to laugh at most of the outrageous rumors that go around this place. Although I am very certain there are a ton of other RoseDelights floating around, you've never been doubted by me.
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But I am definitely 'nicer' off-line, I skip the cutting remarks, and I am much more tolerant of stupidity...
Dlab.. I have to hand it to you. I can't tolerate stupidity online, but even moreso offline. Things fly out of my mouth offline, where online I try to just sit on my hands and not reply to things that I can't be nice to.
My Husband has told me many times that he should sign on a Messenger program and talk to me there, because at least I'd be nice to him. Heh.
I just don't tolerate bullshit, and I can smell it a million miles away.
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
My breasts are larger on-line, but I'm a better cook in real life. ;D
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
I am way easier-going offline.
Also, and forgive me for repeating myself, if my speech patterns were the same offline as they are here, I wouldn't last 5 minutes in my club. If I seem pedantic, it's a result of my educational background--the university I went to trained us to dispense pedantic bullshit with amazing effectiveness.
Offline I laugh when I go into VIP to see if I need to skip the next dancer on the rotation, and see her and the one after that on their knees blowing the customers--what the hell else can you do? It's outta my mind the moment I get back to the DJ booth, except that I now know to skip 'em, lol!
Offline I tend to pay close attention to the person I am talking to, to make sure we are communicating in a mutually beneficial way. If they start yawning, glancing at their watch, or gnashing their teeth, I go find someone else to talk to, and don't ever waste any more of either party's time.
Offline I am much more popular, and the customers really like me, lol (it's true!). Or else I wouldn't be doing so well at work.
Online or off--if I don't get respect, you get diddly from me...
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
I tend to be a little crazier and more flirtatious on line. If they call me out and Im uncomfortable I can always log off.
FBR
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
Well, FBR, I confess to not having read a lot of your recent posts, which might be because I have been offline for 6 months--and is probably my loss.
But I have never noticed you being flirtatious--at least not in that inane, 'fluffy' manner which is so common here, is sometimes irritating, and which I have striven to avoid with at least partial success.
But then, I don't like flirting with guys, lol, so maybe I'm wrong. I wouldn't worry about it, not that you sound worried...
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
Very early in the history of the net, long before the WWW was even a dream, a wise wizard (as the builders of the net were then known) posted something I have since often recalled: "On the net you see people through their own eyes."
-Ww
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
I'm probably better in person. I think I can come off a bit harsh online sometimes, but this is very one-dimensional. In 3D I reckon I'm more pleasant and whatnot. :P
>> I'm also rather more soft-spoken and laid back, at least most times, in person. This kind of thing just doesn't come through online.
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
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Originally Posted by Djoser
Well, FBR, I confess to not having read a lot of your recent posts, which might be because I have been offline for 6 months--and is probably my loss.
But I have never noticed you being flirtatious--at least not in that inane, 'fluffy' manner which is so common here, is sometimes irritating, and which I have striven to avoid with at least partial success.
But then, I don't like flirting with guys, lol, so maybe I'm wrong. I wouldn't worry about it, not that you sound worried...
Djoser LOL. It would be fun for us to get together and tip a couple of cold ones and talk about the intricaties of stripping :)
As Im sure youve noted, I was talking generically and thinking more about my activities in Yahoo chat and my behavior in a few other non SW rooms I frequent. Sometimes those areas get a little crazy and the clientel mentallity is way below what we see here. If it gets too wierd you exit stage right and come back another day.
Once in a blue moon I flirt with the gals here but I try and keep it reasonable and non offensive.
FBR
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
FBR, ever get down to Florida?
You have to see this club I am in...
Don't let my recent posts about murders and biker gang enforcers scare you, it's not so bad--and you don't strike me as being easily scared. If you ever do get down here, you got a drink on me!
BTW, Bridgette's voice is reflective of a personality exactly matching what she has said. She is, it would appear, a real sweetheart. And I mean that without any trace of flirtatious intent, lol.
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
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Originally Posted by FBR
Djoser LOL. It would be fun for us to get together and tip a couple of cold ones and talk about the intricaties of stripping :)
As Im sure youve noted, I was talking generically and thinking more about my activities in Yahoo chat and my behavior in a few other non SW rooms I frequent. Sometimes those areas get a little crazy and the clientel mentallity is way below what we see here. If it gets too wierd you exit stage right and come back another day.
Once in a blue moon I flirt with the gals here but I try and keep it reasonable and non offensive.
FBR
Once in a blue moon? You used to join chat and do that often! Now I can't lust after your young :(
Mast
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
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Originally Posted by Rhiannon
Fear not, TOO. A lot of people just don't want to believe that GENTLEMEN really exist. I've never had a doubt that you're real and I just have to laugh at most of the outrageous rumors that go around this place. Although I am very certain there are a ton of other RoseDelights floating around, you've never been doubted by me.
I’ve never been to the Virginia house, but I can vouch for the fact that his dick, at least, is veryreal….and that it’s much better in person than it is online.
:P
(In fact, it couldn’t be more perfect…hard to believe it’s attached to a guy who’s smart, generous, complex, and commanding—a “gentleman,” for sure, but also so much more…)
Sorry, but it needed to be said…I hope that wasn’t the kind of “fluffy flirting” which so annoys Djoser. ;)
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
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Originally Posted by Nicolina
I’ve never been to the Virginia house, but I can vouch for the fact that his dick, at least, is veryreal….and that it’s much better in person than it is online...
…I hope that wasn’t the kind of “fluffy flirting” which so annoys Djoser.
I cannot imagine anything less "fluffy" than this, and you needn't worry much about annoying me...
Glad you had a good time--and more power to ya.
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
This is a difficult question for me, but most likely in RL. Although I'm much more quiet there. Even so, one of my cousins claims I can "bend your ear" with the best of them if I feel like it. But this is only if I feel comfortable with someone out in RL relatively quickly, which is very, very rare for me. Plus, if I don't have to work or run errands, there isn't much I can think of which would pry me out of the house.
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
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Originally Posted by Casey-11
as such, Internet relationships are seemingly doomed to fail from the beginning, ...
Goddamn it! why didn't you tell me that 5 months ago!!!
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Originally Posted by Mastridonicus
One of the things I like about the internet forums and such is the fact that the community is utterly raceless.
funny, it doesn't stop me from hating your kind.
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Originally Posted by Casey-11[size=2
]
So here is my question...and be honest...Are you a better person on-line or in real life?
How do people perceive you?[/size]
im a lot more manly online. i have a lot less spine in real life. real life im more laid back and easy going. on here, im a total prick. i think im better equipped for life/survival ON LINE. i dont know if that makes me a better person online though. how do people perceive me? i dont know, ask them.
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
online is only 'raceless' if you think raceless=white. in absence of posting images and such, online i am generally taken to be white, and often male. nobody truly 'doesn't see race'. if that was so, there wouldn't be a default setting online of white first and male second.
that said, online is a good place to crush preconceived notions and stereotypes about how a given gender or ethnic group is 'supposed' to act, because you can never quite be sure who's on the other end. and in real life, not conforming to stereotypes just gets a person labelled a token or anomalous representative of the group in question. that's not always so online, which is progress of a sort.
ALTHOUGH now that posting images is so common on the internet and lack of such is viewed with suspicion, plenty of racial crap gets carried right on over, further disproving the 'raceless' notion. who'd want racelessness anyway? every ethnic group and color has something fascinating to bring to the table.
i am the same online as off, for the most part, which seriously confuses people. oh well.
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
^^^
Thank you Miabella:
Mast - universal subject position. There is no such thing as raceless and there is no such thing as faceless.
As for better in real life or online - I dunno. I find myself utterly charming in both scenarios (and you people who disagree can just shut the hell up). I do talk the way I type (or rather I type the way I talk).
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
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Originally Posted by sander8son
funny, it doesn't stop me from hating your kind.
Well us Sand People hate you and your ability to speak anyways.
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
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Originally Posted by miabella
online is only 'raceless' if you think raceless=white. in absence of posting images and such, online i am generally taken to be white, and often male. nobody truly 'doesn't see race'. if that was so, there wouldn't be a default setting online of white first and male second.
that said, online is a good place to crush preconceived notions and stereotypes about how a given gender or ethnic group is 'supposed' to act, because you can never quite be sure who's on the other end. and in real life, not conforming to stereotypes just gets a person labelled a token or anomalous representative of the group in question. that's not always so online, which is progress of a sort.
ALTHOUGH now that posting images is so common on the internet and lack of such is viewed with suspicion, plenty of racial crap gets carried right on over, further disproving the 'raceless' notion. who'd want racelessness anyway? every ethnic group and color has something fascinating to bring to the table.
i am the same online as off, for the most part, which seriously confuses people. oh well.
Hmm I guess my opinion of raceless is 'the absence of race'
Here I am saying 'The absence of race as a necessary reason for opinion'
I'm not saying that the second you get on a computer you lose all driven opinions based in your religion/politicalview or race, but in a location such as this, there are no pre-concieved notions. When a guy in an armani suit comes up to a guy wearing rags and tells her to get a job, he's assuming A: she doesn't have one, and she's assuming B: he has money.
Jenny is right, there is no such thing as raceless and/or faceless, but there IS a such thing as an environment where if the member so chooses, race and face are what they decide to project, and people are normally judged on their personalities moreso than their race here.
In an environment like this whether pictures are posted or whatnot, its easy to forget about the person's background or color in place of what they are saying. I was discussing this with a member, but religion/race/gender/political views and a few other things seem to be a focal point for people in real life. Once someone makes an opinion and also makes known they are a 'Liberal', 'christian', 'pro choice', or 'mexican' it often seems like everything that person said is 'She just feels that way because she's pro choice' Instead of 'Well, why do you feel that way?' Heck even your fellow supports are more willing to listen more so simply because of similar viewpoints not because you could TEACH them anything.
All I am saying is the face and race you have on something like this is projected how you want it to be. The harder you try the better you show, the more natural the more convincing. Don't believe me? How many people wanted to meet RoseDelight?
I certainly mean no offense :D And I am sure <being as tired as I am from severe sleep deprivation I'm going to get my wish from jenny> but all I am trying to say here is that intelligence and ability to contribute to the topic at hand is the major determining factor for a quality contributor. It's what makes it a great place to run to.
Mast
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
mast, you have a more curious notion of humanity than i've seen online. what people are offline they bring to the table online, even when they take on other masks and viewpoints. you cannot hide yourself online completely. little bits of truth will always dribble out. there quite literally cannot be anything like an absence of race. it permeates one's viewpoints, no matter what filters are applied.
i don't know what, if anything was the deal with rosedelight. it's an interesting exercise to note the primary ethnic backgrounds of people misled by false online personas.
i guess it's because i know this isn't some magic fantasyland where race and class and gender just vanish because you want them to that i bristle when people imply it's all the fault of the poster for even daring to acknowledge such presences online.
i am going to go eat some hamachi now.
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
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Originally Posted by Casey-11
Perception is reality
...or, at least it is the perceived reality. I think the mind has a tendency to fill in the holes in any relationship. When you first start dating someone, there is a certain perception of who that person is, which evolves as you come to know that person better. As you do, you find things that may cause you to like that person less, or more, than the person you initially perceived them to be. You either grow closer and stay together, or you decide that the difference between the reality and the perceived reality is too great to tolerate and you move on.
On line it is the same, except the holes are inherently bigger. On line you cant hear inflection, you cant read body language, you cant gauge instantaneous reaction, you don’t get feedback from a person's expression, you cant quietly observe a person's "presence" ...as such, Internet relationships are seemingly doomed to fail from the beginning, ...unless honesty is strictly observed, communication is carefully fostered, jealousy is kept in check, integrity is maintained, and benefit of the doubt is consistently given as the first reaction. Even still, the perception will differ from the reality.
So here is my question...and be honest...Are you a better person on-line or in real life?
How do people perceive you?
In person, by far. I'm not quite as abrasive in real life. I also have a rather insane laugh which needs to be experinced in person to fully appreciate..."LOL" does it no justice at all!
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
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There's been a recurring rumor on the site over the last six months or so that I don't actually exist (e.g. that my on-line persona is "fake"). I think it's mostly said in fun, though, and it's amusing every time somebody reports it to me. The rumors are their way of gently tweaking me back, I suppose, for what are perceived to be my excessive spending in clubs or my habit of assisting dancers in need, or traveling around the country on visits or perhaps being too accommodating and supportive of the dancers in general. Or maybe they are just bored or dislike me for some other reason.
Take in stride, TOO. At least you don't have rumors accusing or suspecting you of using the forum for preying malevolently upon strippers...
Re: Real life or "on-line"?
In person. I am usually in a rush on-line and the opportunity to be "funny, sarcastic, whatever" is too much of a temptation. So, a lot of "me" doesn't really come out.
I am a better listener and unfortunately, when you are reading someone's post they don't see you listening.....
Also, I think you have the ability to create some relationship on line but it rarely can progress into a true friendship unless you can actually meet them.