When a dancer seems to like you: an anecdote. Maybe advice
I've found myself in an odd situation lately. There's a dancer who used ot work at a club I frequent. I've never really been a big customer for her. I have only ever bought one dance from her and also tipped at stage now and then. The one time I bought a dance, she started sticking her tongue in my mouth. Such things are unheard of around here. I won't say I completely disliked it, but there was a definite what the helll? reaction. At any rate, she hasn't worked there in six months.
At a later date, I was at a different local club to support my then-girlfriend, who was auditioning. Many of the dancers at that club were mad at me, for something that was mostly my fault. The dancer in question, who now worked at this other club, came up to me and put her arm around me and told me that she knows I'm a good person and I didn't mean to hurt anyone.
My girl and I broke up. She began working at this other club alongside the dancer in question, who has now left to go to a third club.
Then, a few days ago, she turned up at male amateur night, caught me afterward and told me how I was unique and creative and I shouldn't let anyone tell me different.
Then, yesterday, I went to said third club to check it out as the ex is interested in working there as am I (restroom attendant seems an okay job and I haven't done well in corporate environs). I saw the dancer in question, who motioned me up to her stage and told the customers she had been sitting with that I was a male stripper in a way that sounded like she was bragging on me.
She asked where my girlfriend was. I said we had broken up months ago. We were just still friendly. I told her it was really good to see her and apologized for not having any cash on me. She said that was all right, hugged me and went back to her customers.
I apologized for not having any money on me as I was there to check the place
Later that night, I went to the club my ex works at shortly before close because we were going to go do something together after she got off. The dancer in question was in as a customer. I sat down next to her to say hi and she greeted me as her fan, and put her arms around me and kissed me on the mouth a couple times, then told me I should move because her boyfriend was coming back. Sure enough, a guy came out of the restroom and came over.
AFAIK, I'm generally considered dateable. This dancer and I don't really have a stripper-customer relationship. I'm pretty certain that overall, she's spent more on me than vice-versa in the past six months. Not that it's been a lot. The ATF has encouraged me to ask out a few other dancers. My ex dances (though she only turned pro after we broke up) and sometimes talks me up ot other dancers. She is a better wingman than any male friend I've had, IMHO.
Other info: I have never seen this dancer sober except for the first time I ran into her yesterday, which was near the start of her shift. My ex doesn't think I could handle her. She is about thirteen years my senior (I'm twenty-five. I believe she's thirty-eight.) I think my attraction to her is largely based on her seeming very sad and I want to make her feel better, which I suspect might be a bad reason to be attracted to someone. I don't know what's going on with this boyfriend situation. My instinct here is to try to get to know her better without making any moves, though I've always had a hard time doing that when I've tried it before.
Re: When a dancer seems to like you: an anecdote. Maybe advice
it sounds like she likes you...do you like her, besides wanting to be a knight in shining armor?
Re: When a dancer seems to like you: an anecdote. Maybe advice
Re: When a dancer seems to like you: an anecdote. Maybe advice
Quote:
Originally Posted by Emily
it sounds like she likes you...do you like her, besides wanting to be a knight in shining armor?
That's a complicated question. I certainly got into the kissing for the fifteen or so seconds it lastest. She's the only woman who's really gotten me aroused in months. I spend plenty of time in clubs, but it isn't really a sexual thing for me, at least not in any direct way.
Every woman who's ever been interested in me has been an alcoholic or at least clinically depressed, so if I go ruling her out on those sort of considerations, I'll never get anywhere.
I really don't know her that well. I believe she's read my blog, so the reverse isn't necessarily true. I have seen enough of her to know that she's kind, compassionate and fiercely independent, which are all big plusses for me. I think I'll try to spend time with her outside work and get to know her better.
Re: When a dancer seems to like you: an anecdote. Maybe advice
dude, i knew she was on something before you said you'd never seen her sober, though i thought maybe she likes to roll. so she's a happy, affectionate drunk. i suppose that's the best kind of drunk to be.
you wanna be the guy who comes back from the bathroom and finds her kissing every man within a fifteen foot radius? and even if that's your thing :-X still be careful.
who's going to save you from trying to save other people? :hug:
Re: When a dancer seems to like you: an anecdote. Maybe advice
Quote:
Originally Posted by Clark
Every woman who's ever been interested in me has been an alcoholic or at least clinically depressed, so if I go ruling her out on those sort of considerations, I'll never get anywhere.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Clark
I think I'll try to spend time with her outside work and get to know her better.
Nope, I think you should spend some more time single and work on the first part.