Is this the right thing to do?
http://www.kcentv.com/news/local-art...h.php?nid=8946
The girl was my best friend of 5-6 years. She was beautiful, talented, smart, and loving, and an all-around angel on earth... but that's not the point of this post.
Her father has now decided to crusade against drunk drivers. Fine, perfectly acceptable. There's now a memorial fund in her name, and they had a fundraising rodeo in her honor. Great. But now her father has put her smashed vehicle on a trailer in the middle of town with a poster against drunk driving with her picture on it.
Is it just me, or is this going too far? I can see the point of the poster, but outside of town-- somewhere on the highway, not in a town with only one stoplight. But putting her vehicle on display just doesn't seem right to me. That was her grave; the had to pull her broken body from that twisted metal. I dated the boy that worked at the wrecker service that picked up her car. It sickened me to know that people lined up to see it. I can't think of anything more crass and grisly in that situation.
I know I'm still not over her death, and my emotions might be clouding my judgement here. But does anyone else agree with what he's doing? And further more, is there a way the people of the town can get it taken down?
Re: Is this the right thing to do?
Sorry to hear about losing your best friend.
I think her father is just trying to make his message SPEAK VOLUMES to everyone. He may just want everyone to feel it. Seeing a billboard like that would definately make me think 2x about being under the influence.
I really don't know what else to say..
Taking it down: Was it with his own money? Maybe you could sign a petition??
Re: Is this the right thing to do?
Karen, I'm deeply sorry for the loss of your friend. How tragic that a young life was ended so senselessly.
Now I'm going to talk to you as a parent of a child killed in a car accident. My daughter was 17 and died almost 3 years ago.
I know that you lost a friend but you can't begin to know the pain that her father is feeling. It's unnatural to outlive your child and the suffering is unbearable.
Whether it's tasteless or not, you have to let him deal with this in his own way. Maybe someday he will have closure. We chose to do things more quietly ourselves (i.e. scholarship fund and renaming the local taskforce for her and two laws being proposed in the upper and lower houses) but believe me...it was hard not to stand on that corner with a huge sign saying "SLOW DOWN...MY DAUGHTER WAS KILLED HERE!"
Please try to understand his anguish and be there to support him. My thoughts and prayers are with you and her family as you go through all this.
{{{HUGS}}}}
Re: Is this the right thing to do?
I'm sorry about your friend.
Everyone deals with loss in their own way. Some cry alone in the dark. Some launch a crusade. Some need a memorial.
Then there's a few grizzly types that line up at the scene of death, rubberneck traffic accidents, and go to websites with pictures of dead bodies. Ignore them.
To the point that having the car on the trailer saves a life or helps some one heal, it's alright, even though it's going to be a painful reminder to others.
Re: Is this the right thing to do?
I'm sorry to hear about your friend. I've lost way too many friend's in car accidents, so I know how you feel.
It's just the dad's way of trying to save everyone else's life. Can you blame him? If he's gotten permission from the town, then obviously someone else agrees with him.
Re: Is this the right thing to do?
Thanks guys. I know I can only imagine what her father's going through.
Re: Is this the right thing to do?
I've seen that done before, where they put a wrecked car on display to warn against drunk driving. I think it's great. It sends a much more powerful message than a sign, and if it discourages even one person from driving drunk, then it should be there.
Re: Is this the right thing to do?
Oh my gosh! That was your friend?! I remember seeing this on the news- it was such an odd accident. I'm really sorry to hear about that, though (that she was your best friend).
Is this car sitting in the area where I think it's sitting? When did all of this happen? If it's where I think you're talking about, we were there last week and I didn't notice anything. Either way, though, he's just being a protector...one of his roles as a dad. It's super sad, though.
On another note: I didn't realize you and I live so close to each other!
Re: Is this the right thing to do?
I think it is an important message. So often we have such sanitized messages about horrible things that we don't perceive how horrible they really are. There are the words "My daughter died in a drunk driving accident." Then there is the actual car - the reality of it - I think this is an OK thing.
There is a box car in LA that the Nazi's used to transport jews. When one can touch that - the reality of it really settles in.