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how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
Hey everyone, i just started dancing and the club ive been working at allows custy to touch your breasts, back, arms. thighs pretty much anywhere but your private areas down yonder. Any ways i dont mind the arms back thighs stomach etc. but i find it hard to deal with letting some old weirdo fondle all over my breasts for 20 bucks. I noticed that not all the customers tried to do this some even just sat there and watched like good little boys, but i also have a fiance and he allowed me to try this dancind thing out, somehow he found out that the custys are allowed to touch your breasts and he didnt like it at all! he told me that i would never be able to dance again and that how could i let some old perv fondle my breastsetc. etc. he was very upset. We have talked about it and with alot of reassurance he has agreed to let me try it again but said if he finds out i am letting them touch me there that its pretty much over for dancing and for me and him. (we also have a child together)
Is it okay to slyly avoid being touched in a spot your not comfortable with even though the club says its allowed? and whats a nice way of telling the custy that you dont want to be touched there? Please help because i really enjoy the life and freedom of being a dancer but i dont want to break up my family for it either. :'(
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Re: how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
tell them that you just started taking those breast growing pills and that they are sore! hahaha
tough one. cant you just find a club that wont allow it?
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Re: how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
I can think of 2 thnigs to try. 1. Before the dance say something like "During the dance you can touch here and guide there hand around, but you can't touch ..... and list them." If they say other girls allow it, then say I don't, but I give the best dances here. or
2. Are you allowed to charge extra at your club? If so before the dance or whenever the issue comes up tell them its $200+ per song or some outrageous price to touch your boobs. Good Luck!
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Re: how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
Oh wow i think this is a tough situation if he feels that strongly about it I would be trying to find a club that dose not allow it. Becuse rumars happen you don't have to be allowing it for him to think you are give this some thought. I hope it works out.
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Re: how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
You need to tell the guys up front what your rules are for dances. Otherwise, you need to find a new club. If it's a two way contact club, you are at a severe monetary disadvantage if you don't allow contact.
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Re: how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
if the dances are done out in the open and you cannot upsell to vip or private rooms where you can set your own lower contact levels, then you should probably find a new place to work if that contact level is too much for you.
conversely, if you are significantly more attractive to customers in that club compared to other dancers and/or a far better hustler, you can be low contact and still do fine, open dances or no. but you have to be a girl attracting spendy and/or many customers.
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Re: how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
Just say no and move their hands. You may make less than the girls that allow it but you don't have to allow anything. At my club we have full grind nude dances where they can touch almost anything but some girls only give airdances with no touching at all and they still make money. I would imagine you might get in trouble if you lie to them before hand, so don't mention it unless they ask. Then once they agree to the dance just say "don't touch my breasts."
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Re: how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
I agree with pinkkitten. Don't mention it and don't bring it up until it becomes an issue. If they reach for your breasts, move away and hold their hands in your hands for a moment while you continue to dance. If you let go and they reach for you again, just say something like, "Please don't touch me anywhere a swimsuit would cover." If you don't mind giving some contact, you can then put their hands on your waist or something and then add with a little grin, "It can be a bikini." If they reach for you after that, then you get firm and say, "DO NOT touch my breasts." After that they have had ample warning and you stop the dance.
It sounds like excessive warnings when I type it out like that, but if you're in a club where they see other breast-fondling going on, then it's understandable that they might need a warning or two.
And it sounds like your husband has trust issues. I can't imagine being with a guy who would make a threat like that over a rumor of some guy grabbing you. Maybe some marital counselling would do y'all some good and help him treat you like an equal partner.
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Re: how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
I'm sorry hun, but if you're in Ontario or Quebec, chances are you will not find many clubs where this level of contact is not the norm. Trust me, it is not my favourite thing either. I put up with it, but I have a friend who dances every once in a blue moon, and she doesn't allow any breast contact. She still makes money (very good money, but she's Indian: exotic and very pretty). Anyway, you're best bet is to not mention you're rules til you bring them to the back. Then you've got at least $20 from them. You may not get repeat dances, but not every guy even wants to touch. Actually, some of the best spenders are also the most respectful. I dance for a lot of tourists, so I am sly. If they're not savvy to the Ottawa scene, I leave the thong on and let them touch my legs only. If that's what they're used to, and they haven't noticed what the other girls are doing, it works. But yeah, 95% of the time they will expect to grope. They make me out to be a huge prude just to keep their mouths off me. The point is, don't push yourself to do what you're not comfortable with. You can still airdance and make some money (especially for the first few weeks at any given club, because everyone is curious of the new girl, and they won't know what kind of dances you give), but in the long term you might make even better money as a bar waitress or shooter girl if that is the case (if you're nightly earnings are going to be under $200 on average, why not do it with your clothes on?)
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Re: how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
Molly, I work in a grope-and-grind - not a raunchy one by comparison to the area, but grinding and groping are still part of the norm. And I don't grind and I almost never allow breast touching - they can only touch my breasts if they've spent lots of money and if I'm in the mood, which happens with maybe one lapdance every couple of months. And I average well over $200 a shift even as the cleanest dancer in the club. I'm not the top earner, but I'm not the lowest earner either. It can be done, it just takes a lot of confidence. Personally I think my lapdances are hotter and much more intimate than the impersonal grinding I see other girls doing.
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Re: how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
I personally hate contact, but Im happy doing XXX shows. So if a guy wants to touch I name a huge price, but Ill do XXX shows instead of lapdances (legal in our VIP rooms)
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Re: how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
Girls thanks for all the info. It's good to know that there are ways of getting around it. And it is true not all of the guys were like that. We also are allowed to full nude dances and the guys arent allowed to touch at all, so maybe i should work on selling them types of dances from now on. Just to clarify that it wasnt a rumor that got my husband going, we went to check out the club together before i started and when he would go outside for a smoke he heard all tthe pigs talking outside about what the girls were doing, he also made friendly with one of the bouncers there. Then after i danced for the four nights he asked me if they were touching me and so on i said no, that a couple of them tried but that i moved away when they did that and he just didnt seem to believe me, any ways it doesnt really matter how he found out but it is the truth and i just will have to work around that.If anyone has anymore tips i would be glad to hear them. THANKS AGAIN.
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Re: how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
I guess try it and see what happens. If there's no contact in the nude dances then if it were me, I'd only do nude dances. THat might be a great hustling/selling tip that you only do nude dances and maybe down play the topless dances that in topless, they can only see titties but in a nude dance, they can see everything. Remember too, men are very visual creatures so you might be able to make more money by doing nude dances (especially if many of the dancers there won't do nude) if that's the case, you could end up making a lot more money then them. Just see what happens, give it a try but always stay true to yourself. DOn't sacrifice your own morals and risk ruining the relationship with your babies father for dancing. It's not worth it! If dancing doesn't work out, like mentioned, you could work as a waitress, bartender or shootergirl. They do very well too and don't have to get naked or get touched. Good luck & hope it works out for you!
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Re: how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
A girl I work with only does air dances at my club, and she is a top earner. Sure some guys complain, but she does VERY well. Everyone grinds except for her. If you hustle you will make money. Some girls keep their thongs on when they give dances, some girls don't. Our club is nude/grinding, but no contact, even though a lot of girls do it anyway. Do what makes YOU comfy, I myself am not all that comfy doing a complete air dance for a while most of the time so I choose not to. I don't like to be touched ANYWHERE by the custies, so I don't let them.
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Re: how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
^^^ Grinding but no contact? Uhh... how is that possible? /:O
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Re: how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
Breast touching happens anywhere pretty much in eatern Canada. If a guy tries to slide his hands up I slide his hands down and play with my breasts myself. Just keep slyly avoiding it if you dont want it. If a guy asks why just say your bewbies are tender and you heard that if they are groped to much they will start to sag :D
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Re: how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
use the advice posted and bring it up when it becomes an issue. however, i think you should try looking for another club or another job all together. unfortunately, once word "gets around" (and it will) that you don't allow the types of touching that the other girls legally allow.. you are going to have a very difficult time making good money. that's not to say you can't make money without contact, i just think it's not likely when it's so readily available from other girls.
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Re: how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
The thing is I know the area she works in and its every single club there. The area shes in is so extras ridden its a prostition ring.
Though isnt the Halifax area a little less contact?
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Re: how to avoid contact,even though club allows it.
This is true for most strip clubs in the moncton area but the club i work at has new owners and they are good to their girls, its the best one in moncton and the girls there are pretty clean. The most that goes on there is breast touching and grinding. Which to my understanding happens in more than just the eastern canada area. And actually for the clubs in halifax, dartmouth any contact at all is illegal. I am going to try the only 2 clubs that are in dartmouth just to see how much money is to be made, i was just reluctant because i am local to the place and i will probably see alot of guys i know. Anyways i will let you guys know how it goes when i do try them out. Can anyone recomend some clubs in the ottawa, ontario area that dont allow alot of contact? Actually anywheres in canada because i plan on traveling a bit in the near future? Thanks.