be aggressive without being rude?
i've been at my "new" club for about 2 months now. it's a medium hustle club... you don't sit and talk for hours, but it's not a "wanna dance" club by any means. it's topless/upscale. when sitting with groups of guys with a few other dances i've noticed that quite a few of them are VERY aggressive about sales. more than i've seen at any other club. they will pretty much tell the guy he's getting a dance and start to get naked and dance for him. i've heard of this before, but i've never worked anywhere that had dancers who did this. i've noticed a few times it turns out akward.. where the guy is confused that he owes the dancer money at the end. however, i've also noticed that it -does- work for them many times. they don't "ask" for dances, they tell the customer. i'm not comfortable with "tricking" guys into buying dances or forcing myself on them, but i would like to adapt this method to suit myself. do any of you girls have aggressive ways of getting dances without just downright forcing yourself on them? i'm looking for a middle ground. my hustle is pretty damned good, but i'm always trying to make it better. the one thing i think i still have trouble with is that i seem to be to easy to say no to.. too "nice" about it. i'm confident, i just hate being pushy... to the point where i think i'm way too relaxed about it when i asked. it's hard to explain.. but i feel like as i'm asking for a dance.. no matter what i say.. i say it in a way that sounds like (with the inflection in my voice) it's "ok" if they don't want one. does that make sense? anyway - how can i be more aggressive and not be rude?
Re: be aggressive without being rude?
Good question! More aggresive, but not rude..... Never underestimate the power of physical contact and a smile. You can say just about anything and if you put a hand on his shoulder or knee or even sit on his lap (if your club allows) then flash a big smile while you say "It's time for you get a dance sweety!" It assumes the answer is yes, which is a very hard thing to say no to, and it stays friendly. My .02 cents....
Good Luck!
Re: be aggressive without being rude?
I'll be at a table and I'll be like "I'm dancing for you right now" and then I'll start dancing, basically not giving them a choice to say no, most of the time it works, a couple of times a guy has said no when I started, but most of the time, it works, try it!
Re: be aggressive without being rude?
Quick custy comment: EE's suggestion is great. Do all the touching and eye contact that make it really hard to say no, and phrase the question so that it leads to yes, but still do ask. It makes at least this custy feel a little more valued, and a little more like a person rather than a target. I would react badly to leogirl's approach even if I had already decided to say yes, because it is SO assumptive that it would make me feel like an ATM.
Re: be aggressive without being rude?
Quote:
Originally Posted by leogirl876
I'll be at a table and I'll be like "I'm dancing for you right now" and then I'll start dancing, basically not giving them a choice to say no, most of the time it works, a couple of times a guy has said no when I started, but most of the time, it works, try it!
a lot of guys react badly to that. that's similar to what i was describing the girls at my club doing.
Re: be aggressive without being rude?
I lead them into it with some physical and eye contact, and a few "yes" questions in rapid succession. Then I add the following two commands: "Now let' s have some REAL fun! (after they agree that we were having fun talking, getting a massage, or whatever) Turn Toward me. (or you could say "come with me", if you like.) while I physically turn their bar stool to face me. their knees come open, and quick as a wink I am in there and what-do-you-know, a song is just starting.
Works for me. I do it all with a big playful smile and teh honest conviction that this guy NEEDS to have some fun, and I am just the girl for him!
Re: be aggressive without being rude?
Quote:
Originally Posted by leogirl876
I'll be at a table and I'll be like "I'm dancing for you right now" and then I'll start dancing, basically not giving them a choice to say no, most of the time it works, a couple of times a guy has said no when I started, but most of the time, it works, try it!
This approach only works on very busy nights. Sorry but on a Saturday night where there's tons of guys wanting dances, you just don't have time to sit and talk, on a slow night that's different. And, this works on the young crowd, the 23 yr old bachelor party type of guys, not on the older men. Just my experience anyway.
Re: be aggressive without being rude?
Quote:
Originally Posted by leogirl876
I'll be at a table and I'll be like "I'm dancing for you right now" and then I'll start dancing, basically not giving them a choice to say no, most of the time it works, a couple of times a guy has said no when I started, but most of the time, it works, try it!
Girls are starting to get in trouble for do this. Custys are refusing to pay for dances that they aren't asking for. And management is not backing up girls complaining that custys aren't paying them $$$ owed. This little stunt is just a bad idea.
Re: be aggressive without being rude?
Quote:
Originally Posted by tmlsuperspice
Girls are starting to get in trouble for do this. Custys are refusing to pay for dances that they aren't asking for. And management is not backing up girls complaining that custys aren't paying them $$$ owed. This little stunt is just a bad idea.
You're right. This is a really bad approach style. Years ago I was in a club talking to a manager friend of all things and a dancer just grabbed my hand and started tugging me into the VIP room. I said, "Excuse me!" and she just kept tugging...right in front of her manager. I asked what the hell she was doing and she said, "You don't have a choice...you're going to get a dance!" to which my reply was, "Not a chance." While this type of sale may get a few guys, I can assure you that those few are not happy with the process and for the others who openly proclaim they don't like it, you can bet that you'll never see their face in the club ever again.
Think of it from this perspective. You walk onto a car lot and start glancing at one of the cars. Seconds later a sales-person, his finance manager, and the lot manager all show up in front of you. The sales-person says, "I know you want this car so we did a retina scan of you from across the lot and based on that, we ran your credit and got you financed. You're payment will be $485 a month for 60 months and you don't have anything to say about it...sign here." How would you react?
Re: be aggressive without being rude?
^ that's why i wan't to avoid it. i know it works a lot as far as getting the money, but it's not going to get you repeat dances -and- could very likely get you in trouble. i just want to do things similar but not as forcefull.