Don't get caught, it's illegal!!
In the quiet town of Connorsville, Wisconsin, it's illegal for a man to shoot off a gun when his female partner has an orgasm.
It's against the law in Willowdale, Oregon, for a husband to curse during sex.
In Oblong, Illinois, it's punishable by law to make love while hunting or fishing on your wedding day.
No man is allowed to make love to his wife with the smell of garlic, onions, or sardines on his breath in Alexandria, Minnesota. If his wife so requests, law mandates that he must brush his teeth.
Warn your hubby that after lovemaking in Ames, Iowa, he isn't allowed to take more than three gulps of beer while lying in bed with you or holding you in his arms.
Bozeman, Montana, has a law that bans all sexual activity between members of the opposite sex in the front yard of a home after sundown- if they're nude. (Apparently, if you wear socks, you're safe from the law!)
In hotels in Sioux Falls, South Dakota, every room is required to have twin beds. And the beds must always be a minimum of two feet apart when a couple rents a room for only one night. And it's illegal to make love on the floor between the beds!
he owner of every hotel in Hastings, Nebraska, is required to provide each guest with a clean and pressed nightshirt. No couple, even if they are married, may sleep together in the nude. Nor may they have sex unless they are wearing one of these clean, white cotton nightshirts.
An ordinance in Newcastle, Wyoming, specifically bans couples from having sex while standing inside a store's walk-in-meat freezer!
A state law in Illinois mandates that all bachelors should be called master, not mister, when addressed by their female counterparts.
In Norfolk, Virginia, a woman can't go out without wearing a corset. (There was a civil-service job- for men only- called a corset inspector.)
However, in Merryville, Missouri, women are prohibited from wearing corsets because "the privilege of admiring the curvaceous, unencumbered body of a young woman should not be denied to the normal, red-blooded American male."
It's safe to make love while parked in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho. Police officers aren't allowed to walk up and knock on the window. Any suspicious officer who thinks that sex is taking place must drive up from behind, honk his horn three times and wait proximately two minutes before getting out of his car to investigate.
Another law in Helena, Montana, mandates that a woman can't dance on a table in a saloon or bar unless she has on at least three pounds, two ounces of clothing.
Lovers in Liberty Corner, New Jersey, should avoid satisfying their lustful urges in a parked car. If the horn accidentally sounds while they are frolicking behind the wheel, the couple can face a jail term.
In Carlsbad, New Mexico, it's legal for couples to have sex in a parked vehicle during their lunch break from work, as long as the car or van has drawn curtains to stop strangers from peeking in.
A Florida sex law: If you're a single, divorced, or widowed woman, you can't parachute on Sunday afternoons.
Women aren't allowed to wear patent-leather shoes in Cleveland, Ohio- a man might see the reflection of something "he oughtn't!"
No woman may have sex with a man while riding in an ambulance within the boundaries of Tremonton, Utah. If caught, the woman can be charged with a sexual misdemeanor and "her name is to be published in the local newspaper." The man isn't charged nor is his name revealed.
In Virginia, you can't have sex during the daytime, with a light on, or with socks on.
In Rohnert Park, California, it is illegal for a women to have sex with a cow, but it is legal for a couple to have a threesome including the cow.
In Oklahoma, it is illegal to have oral sex.
Re: Don't get caught, it's illegal!!
^^ holy shit....i know that most of these aren't enforced anymore, but the south dakota/twin bed thing is scary...do they actually demand that of modern hotels? reading laws like this makes me happy that i live in the time that i do...
Re: Don't get caught, it's illegal!!
Isn't the seperation of church and state wonderful? ::)
Re: Don't get caught, it's illegal!!
......In Virginia, you can't have sex during the daytime, with a light on, or with socks on.
NEVER, moving there!!!
Re: Don't get caught, it's illegal!!
I wonder how they came up with these laws. Did something happen that made them "make sense" at the time, or did they have a contest on who could come up with the most rediculous law lol.
Re: Don't get caught, it's illegal!!
side note; you can get kicked out of the U.S. Air Force for getting a blow job, even if its with your wife and at home...but i dont think its ever been inforced, just a excuse to kick out gays (which i think is fucked up).
Re: Don't get caught, it's illegal!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
wasfatboy
Bozeman, Montana, has a law that bans all sexual activity between members of the opposite sex in the front yard of a home after sundown- if they're nude. (Apparently, if you wear socks, you're safe from the law!)
Another law in Helena, Montana, mandates that a woman can't dance on a table in a saloon or bar unless she has on at least three pounds, two ounces of clothing.
It's too cold out here to have sex on the lawn after sunset. I bet they passed that law to shame some particular couple in Bozeman into behaving. OH Montanans....
As for the 3 pounds 2 ounces of clothing, I'm going to start wearing a 3LBS 2OZ Sioux Headdress at work to commemorate Custer's last stand every summer. Let's see how that goes over! :P
Re: Don't get caught, it's illegal!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
madmaxine
As for the 3 pounds 2 ounces of clothing, I'm going to start wearing a 3LBS 2OZ Sioux Headdress at work to commemorate Custer's last stand every summer. Let's see how that goes over! :P
:laughing: rotflmao!!!
Re: Don't get caught, it's illegal!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
TheLioness
I wonder how they came up with these laws. Did something happen that made them "make sense" at the time, or did they have a contest on who could come up with the most rediculous law lol.
I've asked myself the same question, and have concluded that most were probably jokes passed by drunk legislatures.
A few of these things may have had a specific purpose aimed at specific individuals who were irritating the community in specific ways. Like the one that supposedly exists here about dragging a dead horse down the main street on Sundays... I suspect that it was a way of forcing someone to move his business elsewhere, in the blessed days before zoning laws.
Re: Don't get caught, it's illegal!!
JustJayda, I love your sig photo!
Re: Don't get caught, it's illegal!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
ahmeerah
JustJayda, I love your sig photo!
yeah I was gonna say, sorry to thread jack but damn. :D
Re: Don't get caught, it's illegal!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
ahmeerah
JustJayda, I love your sig photo!
Yes, its a wonderful pose. }:D JustJayda as great assets.
Re: Don't get caught, it's illegal!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
wasfatboy
A Florida sex law: If you're a single, divorced, or widowed woman, you can't parachute on Sunday afternoons.
OK, this one I just do not get. Is parachuting a sexual term I am not familiar with?
Re: Don't get caught, it's illegal!!
^^^ They were probably concerned that people might see up your skirts.
Re: Don't get caught, it's illegal!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Yekhefah
^^^ They were probably concerned that people might see up your skirts.
I can see that but then why just Sundays or single women?
Wait, women will parachute wearing a skirt? If it was a long skirt, could it not flap around to upper body and get in the way of the chute deploying?