Question for ethnic dancers?
This may seem like a crazy question and I don't want to sound like an idiot for asking but I need some advice from the black/latina girls who work in white clubs.
I have no idea how to approach white guys or what to say to them. All my life I have been around mostly black men and I pretty much stick to them in the club that I work at. There were a few occasions when I have gotten dances from white guys, but mostly its been from the black ones because I don't approcah the white guys. I just feel uncomfortable around them, but I want to break myself out of this.
I have a white grandmother, so it's not like I've never been around white people and I have friends who are white, lol, its just that I look at them differently. I know that people are people, but there are some differences.
Also, I usually approach black men who are older or more laid back, not the rowdy type. I'm not a ghetto black chick. I'm a typical light skinned, long hairred, articulate speaking African American woman. I know that this does play a factor in how your perceived in the club. Please help with any advice. Thanks.
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
I think most men with money will appreciate an articulate, attractive dancer of any race. The best way to get over your fear of the unknown is to stop thinking and just DO. Chat up guys of different races and just say hello, see how they are doing with a positive, friendly vibe. If you don't get a good read off of the person, just move on to the next but still be gracious, it could be that they are just shy or need to warm up. When you have guys who seem receptive to you, start getting more flirty and tell them how much you'd love to dance for them.....Just do it....the majority of clientele in any given city/club will not be older, polite black men...they will be men of all kinds so treat every man in a strip club as a potential customer and possible regular.
ETA: Being intelligent and charming can only help you in the long run. Even when you don't thin you are being particularly brilliant, mature men with money to spend can sniff out someone with beauty AND brains and spend accordingly. For the rest, just be your sweet, charming self and pretend you are in somewhat of a hostess role where it is your job to greet everyone. This is what I tell myself when Im feeling to nervous to approach a particular guy or group. Make it your goal to at least introduce yourself and let them see your pretty smile whether it results in a sale or not.
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
you know, i understand that some black dancers have this problem, but it just baffles me. i approached everyone, generally with some kind of hello and a smile and general perkiness. unless the guy waved me away or said 'no company now', then they all got the same kind of introductory greetings. men are men are men, as far as i was concerned.
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
I feel the same way as Miabella. It doesn't matter what color a customer is. I'm comfortable around all types of people. In this business white men are the majority of the business in most places, and spend most of the money.I always play my R&B music no matter what the crowd and am just myself. Some white men will be redneckish and prejudiced, and others cool, just like some black men are jivey and full of shit and others are well spoken and polite.
Just be yourself. Being articulate and personable will take a black woman far in this business.
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
Wow, I remember when I first went to a mixed club and I actually had a problem talking to black guys!(I am black, lol). Now I can talk to anyone! What works for me, is saying hi and being charming with EVERYONE, and discussing general things; so have you been here before, how's your day going, blah blah, and kind of letting them direct the convo. Remember that majority of the men in there want to talk, rant, brag,etc. and want you to listen. Im sure you can listen with any race... Hope it works out for you!
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
I'd suggest setting a modest goal. To start with, just tell yourself you will approach ONE white custy per night. When you manage that, it should boost your confidence and later you can go for two. If it's any comfort, there are lots of white guys that PREFER ethnic dancers and are just waiting to meet you. I know because I'm one.
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
I only see 1 color and that's green ! Just smile be sexy and nice, you'll be alright.
Imagine the custies as dollar signs, dollar bills, whatever works for you..Don't allow yourself to feel intimidated is all,because THAT will fuck w/ your money..
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
I used to have that same problem when I began dancing. I was intimidated because I had a preconceived notion that white men wouldn't want a dance from a black girl, but that is totally not true.
After the the initial awkwardness, I realized that the conversation pretty much goes the same no matter the race of the custy. They just may have a different accent or dialect.
In my case, I don't think my race factors in my success or failure. You'll never know until you make an honest effort. Honestly, at this point for me, a custy's race doesn't matter. Just do it and don't think about race. Only experience will make you more comfortable and your confidence will naturally build. You are an entertainer, first and foremost.
The only thing you should thinking about is getting the custy's money out of his wallet!
If you're really uncomfortable, don't even think about asking for the dance. Walk past them slowly and just smile and say "hi". Then observe their reaction. If it's favorable, stop and introduce yourself and take it from there. Baby steps I tell ya!
You'll get used to it in no time!
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
I was a little apprehensive when I first started, but now it's like second nature. When I talk to a customer now how he looks like (no matter if he is black or white, or fat or skinny) I still have a smile on my face and I am very polite. I sometimes try to imagine the guy that I am talking to is the hottest man on earth because that helps too. You may have to listen to a bunch of boring crap from men but I still act interested. I am definatly one of the top earners in my club with white guys being 90% of my customers.
The only time I adjust how I speak to a customer is their age. I approach younger men differently than older ones. (Or more often I approach the younger ones last since they don't have money.)
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
I am comfortable around all races of customers too, you just have to stop thinking that way because you are causing yourself to lose money. In the mixed clubs I worked at, I actually made more off black customers, I don't know why, but most of them seemed to really like me. So don't be scared, you can do it :)
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
Men are men are men...some black men aren't looking for black women when they come into a white club some are straining to find us and vice versa...some men just like women period. The majority of my money is made from older white men. Walk over smile, be in a good mood and just do what you do whether that's sexy or perky or what ever is your work persona. You're cheating yourself out of money for no reason. You can do this!!!! Go get that money!
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
hustlebunny
...some black men aren't looking for black women when they come into a white club
SO true!!!
2 Attachment(s)
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
YEEESSSSSS!!!! I i know this post is old but im bumping it because it's right up my alley. I love white men and white men love black women even when they dont want to admit it. something about the lucious dark skin and smoky eyes and nicely rounded asses gets em every time. the key is to mix this with intelligence, grace, and a little urban, if you know what i mean. they are wowed by a black womans ability to assimilate but also say things that go over their head. when your convo has em all worked up, move to the arm of their chair and let your ass hang over. be funny and be ethnic. dont completely mold into the typical dancer. stay different and youll make them feel like the luckiest guy in the club which leads to big bucks. i work in an all white club with three black dancers
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
I'm black and I love approaching white custys. 1. Walk over confidently. 2. Smile 3. Introduce yourself with a quaint greeting "Hello darlin' how are you/you all my names Vanessa, what's yours (stick out hand for a handshake) 4.Mind if I sit and chat/would you like some company? That's all after invited to sit down ask questions: "So how are you today/how was your day? What brings you to the club? Relaxation a great time, good I have all that in store for you. Is this your first time here?" and on and on. Don't be nervous, make eye contact. I like to gently rub their arm or lightly brush their back with my fingertips. You can tell a lot by their body language and if they are interested. For white customers I definitely dance very slow, seductive and make eye contact.
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
Approaching a white guy is no different than approaching any other guy. For me I've come from a very multiracial family so I've looked at every race as equal. I've dated Lebanese, black, Spanish, Asian and white. But for me my true preference is older white men. That's just what I'm really attracted to. I can find attraction in other men but I just love white men. So it's comes natural when you're not shy at talking to men in general. For me I am a game talker and intelligent at doing so. So the guys find me to be mysterious and they love it. You just have to break away from the one race mentality. Talking to men are the same, they act the same. The only difference is skin color which is what intimidates people.
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
Right Anacol it really isn't any different. I used to tell the girls all the time they're white not fucking aliens. I used to get all that "what do I say, they're different" chile please "watch me work". I'd go over there smile, be pleasant, get them laughing and get some dancers. Even when the white guys come into my club they are already nervous or a little scared so why make it worse by staring and not approaching them. I've even gotten guys that didn't realize they were in a black club until myself and a few other girls popped out the dressing room. I would still be polite as they run like hell out the door because you never know first impressions are everything and I don't like to leave a bad taste in anyone's mouth even if they do think a certain way.
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
I'm bumping this because this is a good thread. My friend just started and has this same issue. The advice here is great :-)
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
"Approaching a white guy is no different than approaching any other guy."
Honestly I don't see how it would be any different. I do/say the same to everyone. (I am black)
Re: Question for ethnic dancers?
Well I think there are cultural differences but we are the same as far as we're all humans and men are men.