Re: Does experience matter?
It's not like they teach a class in this. Just go with the flow. Your experience or lack thereof shouldn't be an issue one way or the other; when you have chemistry with someone, you automatically know the basics and will come up with ideas of your own.
Young girls always tend to stress about this, but it really doesn't matter at all.
Re: Does experience matter?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Yekhefah
It's not like they teach a class in this. Just go with the flow. Your experience or lack thereof shouldn't be an issue one way or the other; when you have chemistry with someone, you automatically know the basics and will come up with ideas of your own.
Young girls always tend to stress about this, but it really doesn't matter at all.
Well, its not a matter of knowing what or how to do it, its more my confidence level while doing it.
I could probably right a book about sex, or have my own column if you know what I mean, I hear it all from my guy friends, and I have a young step mom who taught me everything, its just, when it comes down to dating, and not being nervous, I mean, I know wveryone is, but I'm afraid a guy wont want to deal with that.
Like with sex, asking him what he likes, and maybe seeming nervous, I just dont want to turn him off by fumbling with what I am doing, and the looks on my face.
Re: Does experience matter?
If he's going to put you down for it or make you feel bad about yourself, he's a worthless jackass who doesn't deserve to make out with you anyway.
Re: Does experience matter?
I can't wait until you're in your late twenties. You won't remember asking questions like this. You're a little Sex Machine waiting to hatch!
I recommend you watch some European pr0n and fine erotic cinema. Where American pr0n is geared toward getting men off, European pr0n teaches some very helpful lessons, like how to properly give head, proper insertion of fingers into pooper, and kinky sex as done by the Original Gangsters of Aberrant Sexual Practices, the denziens of the Old World.
PS I know you did not ask for any info about "Sex- OTHER"...but once you do enough of it, you'll end up doing interesting things to change it up a bit. Also keeps men happy.
Re: Does experience matter?
ahah thanks ^
I'm not going to lie, I'm basically a porn addict becuase I've always had to get myself off, but, kinky stuff...I dont know. Maybe you're reight and in a few years, but for now, I have a feeling based on the way i was raised, and how I look at it, it will be boring missionary sex, unless I am totally comfortable trying new things with a guy and maybe getting kinky lol
Re: Does experience matter?
Women under 21 really can't compete with some of the girls I date that are older.
Compared to a sophisticated and very confident 26-7 year old, a 19 year old just seems like a little kid. Even if they are physically very attractive, they just won't have that same rhythm and confidence.
A desperate guy just aching to get some won't care. But if the guy is cool and has choice, it can be a big deal.
I'm currently talking to one girl who is 20, a virgin, and it shows in every interaction with her. I think she's cool but she seems more like a toy and not a peer I want to really connect with.
On the other extreme, one of my favorites is this 33 year old...ahem...married...lady who puts even my mid-20s girls to shame because she's frankly waaaaaaay better in bed, is much more comfortable with herself and so many other little things.
If a girl can keep her looks together, women get more attractive with age in those intangible ways.
That said, looks are still the most important. The above presumes girls of equal physical attractiveness. Give a guy a choice between a vapid 9 and an exciting, cool, funny 8, and most guys will pick the 9. But a fun 9 is better than a boring 9, you get the idea.
I have to add a caveat though. The above really only applies to guys like me who are comfortable with women and don't really have any crazy issues. I have friends(male friends) who are frankly quite intimidated by more confident, older women, and therefore seek out younger girls specifically because they are innocent and more naive. I have had them literally embarrass me in double-dates with a friend of one of my girlfriends because they couldn't really be normal in the presence of such a woman.
If you run into a guy with a younger girl fetish, it just be his physical thing, but in most cases, I would venture it's because he's counting on her naivety.
And god forbid the woman has a great career or is well off for whatever reason. It can be UGLY.
My advice to a younger gal would be to not worry about anything but having fun and don't even waste time thinking about a serious relationship. That will probably be the most productive thing for you.
If you are an older lady with no or little experience, you are in bit of a bind, but my favorite girlfriend right now is a year older than me, but probably has literally 1% of my experience. She was a virgin until 22 or so, and has only been with 3 guys, all of which were very short relationships and not fulfilling. She has the kind of baggage you would expect, but it's manageable.
Re: Does experience matter?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Sh0t
My advice to a younger gal would be to not worry about anything but having fun and don't even waste time thinking about a serious relationship. That will probably be the most productive thing for you.
Advice worth repeating. Young women get pressured into LTRs for different reasons and they miss out on a lot of opportunities for themselves, like Networking, Higher Education, Travel and Sexual Experience. & God forbid you get pregnant, the "book of your life" can end right there unless you're strong and can persevere (single motherhood.)
You don't need a man! You need to learn from many men and find ways to get by on your own. It's not easy but it beats the alternative, which is wasting away in an unfufilling life.
Re: Does experience matter?
Get experience and confidence and get them quick, however you can, or it'll only get worse with every passing year.
Re: Does experience matter?
Quote:
Advice worth repeating. Young women get pressured into LTRs for different reasons
I can tell you one MAJOR reason, that nobody else vocalizes from what I've seen. A lot of guys are banking on meeting a hot chick and marrying her before she realizes the bad deal she's getting, so he will never have to worry about courting/dating ever again.
They realize that if they wait, the chicks will get smarter and then have zero interest in such a situation. A lot of the girls I knew an era ago, when I was like 20-ish, got caught in this and they have entered the regret phase.
Re: Does experience matter?
Thats so funny, see, my ideal life would be settling own soon with a reasonable guy.
As far off as that sounds, also probably naive and childish, I just rather be with one person that explore.
But, from the guys I know, none of them date or look for a wife, they want to be like heff, getting pussy all the time from differnt people.
Re: Does experience matter?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Sh0t
I can tell you one MAJOR reason, that nobody else vocalizes from what I've seen. A lot of guys are banking on meeting a hot chick and marrying her before she realizes the bad deal she's getting, so he will never have to worry about courting/dating ever again.
That's where my years 1997-2000 went! Stuck with a jerk. I always wondered why I was so unhappy.
But I can thank him for the lesson, I'd rather shoot myself than settle down again.
Re: Does experience matter?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Lie_still
But, from the guys I know, none of them date or look for a wife, they want to be like heff, getting pussy all the time from differnt people.
The awful truth is that (when they get older) those coosehounds HAVE someone at home cooking the meals and washing the clothes...Cheating is more rampant than people want to believe or let on. (Again, taking a page from the European Handbook)
They're not looking for a wifey because they have one already! :-X
Re: Does experience matter?
um.. am i the only one who thinks its weird that she was talking to her brother about sex? maybe its just me because i would NEVER talk about sex with my brother. hes younger, but even if he was older.. asking for sex advice? that just seems odd to me :-\
Re: Does experience matter?
Most men aren't built to be players. Even assuming they could manage to build up an informal harem based on their qualities, juggling women and dealing with the inevitable issues is really too much more work and not enough benefit for most men.
From my side of the gender fence, most men are looking for a mate, but they are always holding out for a supermodel, if they think they have a chance. The more desperate, the lower their standards, barring some delusion.
Women often confuse players with guys who are just hedging their bets hoping for a hotter chick to come along.
Re: Does experience matter?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
britt244
um.. am i the only one who thinks its weird that she was talking to her brother about sex? maybe its just me because i would NEVER talk about sex with my brother. hes younger, but even if he was older.. asking for sex advice? that just seems odd to me :-\
I talk to my kid brother a little bit about sex but not in graphic terms. I'm proud he gets a lot of ass. Must be a Latin thing ;D
IMO, every guy wants to leave a wet spot on your bed...A lot of the dudes who brag about how they would only take the "best looking" chicks to bed will pound anything that stands still long enough.
& As for landing the supermodel- "Behind every gorgeous woman is a man who is tired of her shit."
Re: Does experience matter?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
madmaxine
The awful truth is that (when they get older) those coosehounds HAVE someone at home cooking the meals and washing the clothes...Cheating is more rampant than people want to believe or let on. (Again, taking a page from the European Handbook)
They're not looking for a wifey because they have one already! :-X
haha well, the guys I know are early to late 20's without wifes, but I get what you are saying.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
britt244
um.. am i the only one who thinks its weird that she was talking to her brother about sex? maybe its just me because i would NEVER talk about sex with my brother. hes younger, but even if he was older.. asking for sex advice? that just seems odd to me :-\
haha okay, I'll fix that, hes not technically my brother.
Hes just a guy I've known my whole life, so, in a way yea we are close and it could be thought of as weird, but, my family had brought me up in a very open truthful home, so, things like that dont bug me.
Re: Does experience matter?
No contradiction above, fucking a chick and "Dating" her are quite different.
And that quote is funny, but it's not true for most men. MOST men will put up with anything as long as the girl is hot enough.
Few men have the balls to tell a beautiful girl to fuck off if he is addicted to the validation being her bf gives him, the envy of his friends, etc.
Most realize "she" could be the hottest thing he'll ever get and thus is pretty likely to rationalize her problems away.
Re: Does experience matter?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Sh0t
And that quote is funny, but it's not true for most men. MOST men will put up with anything as long as the girl is hot enough.
I have seen some sad-sack examples of what you're talking about.
But I have met men who DID dump a girl they had put on a beauty pedestal when they unexpectedly walked in on her fucking another man. (WHY do I always have these convos at strip clubs with custies...? I digress.)
Back to the OP topic, as you age, you will realize there is nothing you can do to change people's opinions or motivations. The older you get, the less you will care. "You might not alway get what you want, but you might just find what you need."
Re: Does experience matter?
something about this post seems troll-like...maybe my radar is off...but...
Re: Does experience matter?
Of course you'll get more comfortable with practice, don't stress about it.
But also keep in mind that everyone likes different things, so you can't really ever "master" sex. I'd just chill and work more on communication. Really be responsive to your partner and communicate well and it's hard to be a bad lover.
Also, some of it is chemistry. People can have the experience, but just not click in the bedroom.
Re: Does experience matter?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Mr Hyde
something about this post seems troll-like...maybe my radar is off...but...
Nope, sorry, just a pathetic teen.
Yea, Its funny when you tell everyone else it doesnt matter what otheres think, you shouldnt care, and then you find yourself being hypocritical when you are worried if a guy will like you, becuase you dont have the experience that most your age posses.
Re: Does experience matter?
How old are you? I might have missed it if you said it, sorry.
Re: Does experience matter?
Lie_still, I totally recommend you see the Spanish movie "Jamon! Jamon!" with Penelope Cruz and Javier Bardem. It's mostly about a teenage girl who is sooo sexy/good at sex....& People notice.
Sadly, I can't think of a mainstream American film that would give a free pass to a teenage nyphomaniac. Society in general discourages young women from being sexually fufilled.
Re: Does experience matter?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Mr Hyde
something about this post seems troll-like...maybe my radar is off...but...
i was thinking the same.. esp since the sn is lie still.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Lie_still
Nope, sorry, just a pathetic teen.
how old are you? /:O