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  1. #1
    Veteran Member Minette's Avatar
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    I just had to have one of my ferrets put to sleep. It just makes no sense - she was the healthy one, while her sister has two fatal diseases and is bald and underweight. (Yes, the sick one still has a good quality of life, aside from looking funny, so I'm not being an irresponsible pet owner by not going for the euthanasia option yet.) For months, I've been worrying about how she was going to deal with her sick sister dying and then she unexpectedly has a stroke and is paralyzed in the hindquarters. I'm just so stunned. Also, I feel so bad, because I haven't been spending enough time with them since all I do is work two jobs and study for the GRE. Plus, her sister got more attention since she's sick and is on medications that I have to give her twice a day. I feel like a terrible ferret mother.
    And I don't know why, but I don't want to talk to any of my friends about it on the phone or anything - I'm so glad my housemate was asleep when I got back from the emergency vet. I just want to curl up on it all. I don't why I want to post about it here - maybe 'cause I don't have to actually speak about it. I feel like there's something wrong with me that I don't want to talk to any of my friends about it - that's usually how I deal with stuff.
    I have to decide what to do about the ashes tomorrow and call the vet. I'm not into the idea of keeping them around - it's not her - she's gone, but I'm kind of uncomfortable with the idea of her ashes being separated from her sister's - when her sister does have to be put to sleep, even though I don't want to keep them. I don't even really understand why I feel that way - I just do.
    And, I don't know what to do for her sister - she was there when during the euthanasia, and I showed her the body - she kind of flipped out so I think she understood, which is good, but she's going to be so sad and I'm afraid her health will just go down the tubes because of it, which would be so much worse than her just dying because she's sick. Fuck fuck fuck - it just makes no sense; there was no indication of ill health. What the fuck am I going to do now.
    Sorry this is so long.
    Dear Lord, save us from those thy children who speak without thought, and protect them also from the rotten tomatoes they shall thereafter receive in the kisser.

  2. #2
    mermaidnz
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    awwww

    i know how you feel, my ferret was put down some years ago when it too lose motion in its hind legs . saddest thing watching it like that, and just as sad to have him put down.

    will you get another ferret?

    why dont you save the ashes, and when the sister dies, mix them both together, and sprinkle them somewhere they both loved playing?

  3. #3
    Member Cypress Shade's Avatar
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    Awwwww!!!! I am just so so so so SOrry.

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    I am so sorry for your loss. Poor furbabies!

  5. #5
    Veteran Member Minette's Avatar
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    Thank you ladies - very much.
    I'm really sorry about your ferret mermaidnz - people shouldn't have to see their baby like that.
    See, that's the thing - I feel like I should get another ferret for my now-only-child so she's not alone, but I really don't want to have more ferrets - for so many reasons. And then when she dies, I've got another only ferret and, etc. I'm such an absent mother right now, and when I get into grad school I imagine it will only be worse - not a good time to get more pets. But I hate to think of her by herself - she's so bald, how will she stay warm without her furry sister? And on the other hand, what if she hated the new ferret 'cause she's old and set in her ways? Ugh.
    I think I will keep these ashes and put them together when the time comes - whether I'll sprinkle the conglomerate or just have the vet deal with it I don't know. I'm so mixed on what I'll do with the 'ashes combo' (ooo - that sounds so twisted, but I don't know what else to call it) - I don't feel like it would be my babies - they'd be gone, but I'm still having angst about what to do with them - I totally didn't expect to. I only know I don't want to keep them. The only place they played is across the country, and I'd feel like a jerk having one of my friends have to deal with that.
    I really feel like I've been kind of prepared for the other one going - she's been sick for a while and I've known it was terminal, but having this happen instead is such a shock - I can't really believe it. Ugh, I don't want to go to sleep 'cause I feel like I'll forget while I'm asleep and then wake up and remember all over again. Doesn't that sound melodramatic. Maybe I'll go study some more.
    Dear Lord, save us from those thy children who speak without thought, and protect them also from the rotten tomatoes they shall thereafter receive in the kisser.

  6. #6
    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Im so sorry. Loosing pets is devastating. I lost my dog almost a year ago and I still think about him everyday.

    *hugs*
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  7. #7
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    I'm sorry for your loss.

    I've had a number of ferrets-I love them and miss them too. They're so delicate sometimes. Maybe instead of getting a new ferret for the sick girl to play with you can get her some good stuffies to snuggle with and one of those fleece hammock tubes to keep her warm. One of my woozles was nude for a while (from stress) and it helped to have stuff for him to climb in.

  8. #8
    God/dess RoseWhite's Avatar
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    HUGS to Minette! So sorry to hear that honey.
    "Before I conceived you, I wanted you. Before you were born, I loved you. Before you were here an hour, I would die for you. This is the miracle of life." -- Maureen Hawkins

    "I just can't get over how much babies cry. I really had no idea what I was getting into. To tell you the truth, I thought it would be more like getting a cat." -- Anne Lamott

  9. #9
    Chicagoeditor
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    Hugs, Minette. You seem like a wonderful ferret mom. Sorry for your loss.

  10. #10
    God/dess Mastridonicus's Avatar
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    Awww I'm so sorry to hear. You're such a good FertMom too.
    People are not ruled by their memories.

  11. #11
    Member sugar_spun_sister's Avatar
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    i'm sorry that happened
    my small furry went in a similar way earlier this year and i too found it incredibly hard. one week she was fine the next i had to euthanize her.

    it's so hard to deal with something like that when it's unexpected.

    i just want to say, as corny as it sounds, time does heal all. it's hard now but in time, things get better. concentrate your efforts on caring for your other little one and with time, you will be able to remember her in a non-painful way.
    also, don't worry so much about not being able to spend time with them recently, you sound like an awesome mom, sometimes it's not easy juggling everything around. at least at the time you were busy they had each other.

    i have the ashes from my baby still. just in a little box hidden away. i don't ever look at them really, but if you really don't want her ashes around, could you give them to a friend or relative to keep safe?
    i think it's a lovely idea to want to keep the sisters ashes together, when the time comes.

    anyway i've rambled a bit, just wanted you to know that i understand how you feel. take some time to grieve... often people don't seem to think that's too important with animals like ferrets or hamsters but it is, they are just as important as other pets.

    condolences x

  12. #12
    Veteran Member Danielle_'s Avatar
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    I just want to chime in w/ some sympathy.

  13. #13
    Veteran Member Minette's Avatar
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    I feel like I've developed some sort of cheeseball alter-ego to say this – I can’t believe I am saying it, but it's true - your condolences mean a lot. I 'preciate it great-ly and the great suggestions on helping my remaining baby and dealing with stuff for me, particularly since I only post once every other blue moon or so and am not really that 'tied in' to the community here. it muchly nonetheless. You are a wonderful collective of people. All right, that’s enough mush for one day.
    I called the vet to request having the ashes returned to me after cremation. I'll hold onto them until the inevitable happens with her sister and then decide where to put them. A friend in Seattle has offered to take the ashes to the park where I used to take them to play if that is what I eventually decide to do.
    She does have hammocks already (there's a sweet ferret set-up in this house - sometimes I'm kinda jealous noone will buy me a multi-floored mansion and a separate romper space with tents and beds), but I did get out the fleecey winter blankets for her as well. I think I will try the stuffed animal thing - she used to eat them as a baby, so hasn't been allowed to have any since then, but maybe as mature adult she wouldn't. Hmmmmm. Well, maybe I'll try it under supervision only at first. Not that I don’t have faith in my well-behaved little angel.
    Um, this might be sort of creepy, if so, I apologize. It's one of the last of sooooooooo many pictures of them. All else aside though, it's a pretty damn cute picture - and I'm always one of those oh-look-at-this-picture-how-cute-are-my-babies kind of mamas.
    Dear Lord, save us from those thy children who speak without thought, and protect them also from the rotten tomatoes they shall thereafter receive in the kisser.

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