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Thread: is my new bf affecting my hustle?

  1. #1
    Member Torrential_Downpours's Avatar
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    is my new bf affecting my hustle?

    I'll make this as short as possible.

    So this is basically it- I met my new boyfriend at my club.

    He came in alot and mostly we sat at the bar, talked, smoked and drank. He never watched the girls onstage, never wanted dances. (But he tipped me well because I think he felt guilty).

    We went to IHOP 2 weeks later after I got off work. To my surprise he was still a gentleman, opened doors and paid, didn't even use curse words in my presence.
    We exchanged numbers, and I drove away.

    He texted me 30 minutes later, asking if I got home okay & if tomorrow I'd like lunch on the beach. I went & we've been dating ever since.

    And my hustle has sucked more than ever! I can't get myself to work two days in a row. When I am there I have to sit at the bar for at least 30 minutes with two drinks and I'm FINALLY ready (And I've HAD to drink before).

    I don't know if it's just my time to move on, or if it's because he's so cool with it. I've only been dancing for two years, and I've always been comfortable with the mileage at my club (super low, no extras). But lately I'll catch myself giving a dance and I can't help but want to puke all over the guy. (I get that disgusted!)

    I mean he never tells me to go or not go to work. He respects me and my choice to work there, and he doesn't take advantage of me. I've talked to him about it and he suggested asking the GM if I could be doorgirl or cocktail waitress. My only concern is that I won't be able to support myself (not like I'm making a killing dancing now anyway).

  2. #2
    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: is my new bf affecting my hustle?

    If you want to stop dancing for you then do it but if it has anything to do with him don't do it. A guy you have known for such a short time is not worth sacrificing your income for. You prob just feel a bit sensitive because when girls get a bf they often only want to be sexy for the bf not for customers at work.

    Just think of the two as separate.
    Quote Originally Posted by Corgan View Post
    when regulars turn cheap, it's time to kill em off.
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    You're still a vagina.
    There are many stereotypes about the industry that I work in. Sometimes they can be true but human beings are very diverse creatures and cannot be pigeon-holed into one category.

    Some of the most effortlessly beautiful, kind, intelligent, successful, motivated, driven and ridiculously hilarious women that I have ever met have been dancers. I've met the best friends that I've ever had in this industry.

  3. #3
    Veteran Member jessica_rabbit's Avatar
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    Default Re: is my new bf affecting my hustle?

    Yeah, I'd say this guy has completely KILLED your hustle. If you want to continue as a dancer you really need to be professional and seperate your work from your personal life. If not, then dancing may not be for you, and that's ok too. Take some time to really think about what you want. I remember feeling this way when I fell head over heels in love many years back. It's pretty normal to feel that way, actually, when you find yourself in a new relationship. But try to think long-term about what you want for yourself, with or without this guy.

  4. #4
    Lola Rose
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    Default Re: is my new bf affecting my hustle?

    imo... it's hard to dance when you have feelings for osomeone. it's hard to seperate those two parts of your life. it's like.... quadrupally harder to dance contact and be in a relationship.

  5. #5
    God/dess LuckyOne's Avatar
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    Default Re: is my new bf affecting my hustle?

    Been there, done that (at least as far as losing interest in talking/dancing for other guys) and I wish I had advice for you. I only got my motivation back after I broke up with him. It sucks doesn't it?

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