Oh not at all. Everyone is differant. And I certainly dont go out looking like a slob when I'm going SOMEWHERE or I'm with someone else. But I got so freakin' tired of being hit on every time I went to buy milk or something that I started intentionally looking crappy hoping to discourage it.
I didnt mean it was true for everyone and it was absolutely an idiotic generalization. My point was simply that it described ME!





That was my reality for 18 months of living with one. To be honest, the main reason why I am scared about getting serious without another dancer is because my poor toes can't take it anymore. Some of you guys(I'd say most, but let's give you benefit of the doubt) are very messy.yup. all over the kitchen, in fact my house is just a pile of shoes.
Actually, that's almost exactly what I did. Porn stars are people, too! Movies are overrated though. Popcorn for five bucks?And they are always stingy with the butter-like topping.Are you fucking serious? Waitresses, Retail Clerks and lawyers ARE NOT IN THE SEX INDUSTRY!! It's not the same thing, hello!?! We, strippers are!! What the fuck?? Would you show up on location and ask a porn star if she'd like to have a nice night of dancing and a movie with you and perhaps be your girlfriend? No you bloody well wouldn't!!
Some Pinkies here might also argue that strippers are not in the sex industry. They are "entertainers". There used to be 200-reply threads on that topic right here on SW. OTB used to spark them, peace be upon her.
It's just about the same as trying to get time to talk to a cute waitress or bartender you fancy. In fact, in some ways hitting on a hot waitress is harder than trying to hit on a stripper at work because the stripper gets all kind of ridiculous come-ons, OTC offers, etc. Goofy shit. The waitresses get "nicer" come ons and is probably more jaded to the type of approach from a normal, cool dude.
From the POV of the dancer, stripping is different from being a waitress. From the POV of a guy who tries to date both, they are similar enough to treat the same.
All that befriend the DJ/bouncer shit is for the birds. They are so used to people trying to ingratiate themselves to get "in" it's retarded.
You can't love something you think is flawless - me
Ladies you really ought not to take Sh0t too seriously. He's really a big ole kitten.
"Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
"And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion
Originally Posted by Mia M
I personally am just miffed with him regarding this subject. Outside of this thread I have enjoyed his input on SW.





I don't see why hon, I don't think I'm saying anything negative about strippers or women.
That's just the experience as a guy who has dated/dates dancers.
I love your input, too. I don't want to fight![]()
You can't love something you think is flawless - me





^^^^^^ These are all good reason why men. May find it hard to date a dancer. Or at first they are cool with it! Than later they want you to stop dancing because, "they cant stand when a man looks at you like a pieace of meat."
I know some guys are pretty cool and great! They dont care what others think, and they are sercure with themseleves and the relationship. (Which is pretty hard to find)
But I for one is tierd of being targeted with propsal by men because I am a dancer. It is like the feeling rich men, feel about women who target them for thier money. Why cant men just date you for you, not because of your occupation.
For the record, I put my shoes up! I can not have my son running around with my shoes. Showing them to company! My son alway hide my shoes. Than bring them out when I am looking for them or when company is over the house.
If you want the present to be differant from the past, study the past.
Baruch Spindza
It is what it is, not what you want it to become, that's important -- at least for now. Today, remember that things worth having are worth waiting for!
The Stars
Minds are like parachutes: They only function when open.
Thomas Dewar
Dont throw away the old bucket until you know whether the new one holds water.
Swedish Proverb





Ok it's time for some of you SWers to come out the closet about the shoe thing. I will name names if I have to.
I guess the messy ones won't admit it, but the clean ones will get adamant about it, of course. I still love you guys.
From the guy's POV, dating a dancer is very similar to dating other kinds of women hired for their looks or their charm. Like one of my lady friends is a club promoter, so she has to be flirt and stuff as part of the job and it has made past dates of hers quite uncomfortable, especially if they wanted to come to some of the events and then had to watch her giving hugs to a whole bunch of dudes, whatever. Some guys, this kind of stuff is not really an issue.
But to be honest, there is another point I forgot. I've probably dated about...shit maybe 20 dancers(meaning more than just a fuck, like I liked them, had some time with them, etc) including being married to one. Some girls do bring work home and try to "hustle" the men in their lives. Or treat new men in their lives like customers first, even if the guy comes to the table not seeing her as a dancer but as a woman.
Outside jealousy issues with the MEN, I'd say the above is the biggest reason I've seen relationships with dancers end prematurely, even when the people were quite compatible and dug each other.
But that happens in lot of professions. Counselors bringing home their psycho-babble to the dinner table, anybody bringing home work stress and cause tension at home, whatever.
But drama and all, there is something pretty sexy about a stripper girlfriend. not quite as sexy as having a comedian girlfriend, but close enough.
You can't love something you think is flawless - me
I'd date Roulette, but only if she promised to wear that pirate costume she used to have in her avatar.
In that case she could leave her shoes in the hall all she wanted...
There's a big difference between trying to date a person who happens to be a stripper and trying to have a stripper girlfriend. Most people fall into the second category.





Nothing wrong with either.
No difference from liking blondes over bald headed girls, etc.
You can't love something you think is flawless - me
Very, very, VERY different.Liking a certain physical characteristic may be because you are attracted to that type. Most guys will still pick girls that they like other aspects of their look and personality. For example, most guys who prefer blondes won't date any blonde, only the ones that have other physical and personality traits that appeal to them.
On the other side of the spectrum are most of the guys that want a stripper girlfriend. They don't give a shit what we look or act like, who we are, if we are intelligent, kind, etc. The only thing they are after is the status of dating a stripper, or the percieved sexual openess of dancers.
Unless a dancer has no self worth, she will not allow herself to be a pretty little bauble used to impress others. And seriously, you must be joking if you expect anyone to believe a man has coincidentaly dated 20 strippers while still seeing them as individuals, not as interchangeable ideals.
Women want to be seen as individual and unique, wanted for who we are, not what we do.
BTW - Anyone who works in a club, please do not be offended by this. I realize you may date an indordinately high percentage of dancers while still seeing them as the wonderfully unique women that many are. This is aimed at men who seek out dancers to date, without having any idea who they are as people.
Jasmine





No kidding. Okay, I have gone out with a good number of bookstore employees (maybe 4-5 over 12 years or so), but that's because I worked at bookstores so much. And gone out with, as in had some dinner with.
If you work in a club, I can understand a high number of stripper-dates. Otherwise...it's not a coincidence.





By stripper girlfriend, guys usually mean hot stripper girl. I gurantee you most who are looking for strippers don't just want any ole stripper. If they have the stripper fetish, they probably have an image in their head of the Hollywood Stripper. I would venture, anyway.
I don't even visit strip clubs unless a friend is asking me to come see her at work for whatever reason. And then I usually end up dating one of her coworkers i met that night. The problem is seemingly whenever I do go to a strip club, I end up meeting somebody I end up dating.And seriously, you must be joking if you expect anyone to believe a man has coincidentally dated 20 strippers while still seeing them as individuals, not as interchangeable ideals.
Twenty dancers may seem like a lot, but who really keeps track of all the retail workers and secretaries or whatever you date. Strippers just stand out because the job is somewhat unusual to the general population. People may say "Oh Tim dates a lot of strippers" simply because most men never date any. I rarely hear "Oh Tim dates a lot of office workers" even though that's even more the case. I've dated only one pornstar, but that's enough to get you marked as a guy who dates pornstars. I've only dated one lawyer, too, but nobody cares about that.
For a girl I guess the equivalent might be dating band members or clowns or something. Date one clown, and you are forever marked as the clown fucker.
You can't love something you think is flawless - me





I'll admit it, if no one else will. I leave my shoes out! Then again, I live alone in a DINKy little studio, and it's either leave the shoes out in plain view, or leave the shoes under the bed where the rat chews on them and destroys them. Two pairs of shoes with broken straps to prove it.![]()
and although part of me wants to agree with viola and say yeah, it IS kind of strange to want to be with a girl for what she does, rather than who she is, I guess I can still see the viability of taking the girl for an individual... after all, I'm sure every girl here can think of 20 different customers, all met in the club, that we think of as individuals. (Of course, we haven't nECESSarily dated them, but I suppose it could still serve as the basis for comparison).
OK, what the hell, I'll play.
This might surprise you.![]()
The way I see it, ShOt is actually very close to the truth. He's just using the wrong words to say it.
The reason I know he's right is that he knows about the shoes. He's got the "dress down in public to deflect attention" down perfectly. He hasn't mentioned the concept of "dancer time," yet, but I figure it's coming soon.
OK, I'll be the interpreter.
In this particular thread, he is actually an advocate of treating dancers not like dancers, but like any other attractive women. His point turns on the concept of guys' infatuation with attractive women, irrespective of profession. He lays most of the blame for relationship failure at the guys' feet (where it generally belongs). He has no evident stripper dating fetish, or is looking for any status from it -- no guy like that would ever post a thread entitled, "Strippers or Waffles?"
He's also tried to hammer home the idea that he doesn't care in the slightest if the girls he dates are strippers, because he's not defining them by profession. Given the tenor of his posts, this makes sense. In fact, the post above is the first time I've ever seen him put a number to it, and he's only done it in response to a poster doubting it.
Oh, and in my view, the shoes are a wonderful endearing trait, but, damn, they become a monstrous pain in the ass at night.![]()
"Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
"And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion
Originally Posted by Mia M





Who are these women throwing shoes around? My closet is a mess of shoes, but I close the door! No one sees, no one dies at night.





If you want the present to be differant from the past, study the past.
Baruch Spindza
It is what it is, not what you want it to become, that's important -- at least for now. Today, remember that things worth having are worth waiting for!
The Stars
Minds are like parachutes: They only function when open.
Thomas Dewar
Dont throw away the old bucket until you know whether the new one holds water.
Swedish Proverb





I clearly stated that the second most common reason in my view is something on the part of the women.
Katrine: you had me at hello.
I don't treat anybody like an attractive woman. I treat all women as if they were fat. Except the fat ones. I treat them like gay men.
Roseleigh: they exist and at least 4 of them post on this very forum.
You can't love something you think is flawless - me





Probably because we are women not just strippers and we hate being reduced to just our job. Let's say you found a WOMAN who was smart and funny and cool and hot who just happened to be a stripper then that's different. Too bad we are all drugged up whores![]()
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