So I am home to see the parents over the weekend, and as always, I swing into my very first club to make the extra m0nies. I was late getting there, but I worked like a dog for a few hours until more girls came in besides the two of us that were already there. Fast forward to about midnight.
A bachelor party rolls in. Dandy! It's been really slow up until this point and I was nowhere near breaking my personal goal of $300. I'm glancing over the bachelor party to get a feel for the guys (are they going to be spendy? Are they looking antisocial, and thus, not very spendy?) That's when I noticed I recognize a guy. I graduated high school with him, and he used to live up the street from me. Then I recognize another. And another. ...and another. All in all, I recognize 3/4 of the bachelor party, including the bachelor. We all graduated together. I thought my eyes were going to bug out of my head. I must of looked panicked, because one of the regulars there kind of chuckled and asked if I was okay.
The the guy who lived up the street from me turns around, and we lock eyes. I do the first thing that pops into my head. I mouth "Boo!", grin, and flounce away.
In high school, I was a grade a, card carrying N3RD. I would be more likely to be a librarian (if I had stayed the same person) than a stripper.
So they get situated at the stage. Stage rotation keeps rolling, so can you guess who is up next? Good ol' Delilah (your's truly). As I'm walking up to the stage, I hear Hometown Guy yell "I like your glasses!" and smirks at me. I smile kind of wryly at him, and get up there to do my thing. One by one I watch most of the guys' faces light up with recognition, and some take the "Oh my God" look. (Remember, I was a mouse in high school? I dressed in baggy clothes. Now not only do they recognize me, but I'm about to get naked.) Hometown guy begins sending the word down the line about my secret identity if only to confirm it, and he looks like this is the biggest scandal since Clinton. I flick him off a couple times, and refuse to dance for him. My set ends, I get off, get dressed, and immediately search for him.
I manage to corner him. "Okay, Steve, just wanted to make a few things clear. You did not see me, as I was not here. Okay?" He said he wouldn't ever, just he couldn't believe me of all people would be a stripper. I said all people change and do out of character things, but I wanted to reiterate that this encounter is off the record books. He agreed, and said he didn't even live bear my Dad anymore, but over and hour away. We talked for a bit. The bachlor is marrying the girl he dated pretty much throughout high school. I knew her. When I went up again, I congratulated him. Told them that I'd appreciate this encounter being stricken from the record, and they were cool with that, as they were always the agreeable type. One wouldn't look at me, though he was always shy as I remembered him, though we didn't talk much.
They did chair torture (which I steadfastly refused to do when they asked me if I would) and I laughed and watched. I gave a lapdance to one of the guys in the party that I didn't know. Hometown Guy got two dances with a girl who was the younger sister of a guy the graduated with us. (my jaw hit the floor, especially after I realized they knew each other's identities! Boyfriend explained it later "Ever heard a guy comment to his buddy about his hot sister? 'Dude, you're sister is hot.' "dude, knock that off, she's my sister!' "I'd totally bend her over.' 'DUDE!')
They left shortly thereafter. I hope I didn't ruin the party but I don't think I did. Not exactly the class reunion I was looking forward to. Our actual class reunion will be amusing. It's a number of years away thought. Bother.



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