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Thread: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

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    Default DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    I need some advice on this. I along with many of you other girls on here believe in "unwritten rules of ettiquette" in all areas of the club. Lately there's been a problem in my row in the DR. My row is the only row in the DR that's Non-smoking. And it seems more and more new b*tches (new meaning less 0-3 months working there) are flocking to the Non-smoking row and taking up all the room. The problem with that being is, these girls already have lockers somewhere else in the DR but camp out and put all their sh*t there and us girls who do have a locker there are having to fight for our spots! Although nobody owns a spot anywhere, it's pretty much known who sits where and it's kind of according to where your locker is and seniority.

    Every time a new girl puts all her crap in a place where one of us gets ready at, we are always very nice about explaining things to only get major attitude. Last Saturday this girl who's always cluttering up the row (who has a locker somewhere else) got into it with me. The way we've been handling her and a few other girls that either won't take the hint or are just extreme bitches, we move their stuff over. When she come back to see her stuff is moved she puts on the ultra attitude "Ughhhh, who moved my stuff!!!!" Dancer M, said she did it and explained very nicely that we're trying to make room for everyone. Well, she went off on her so I of course stepped in because dancer M is my friend and this girl is totally in the wrong and she's been pissing me off for a long time!!! I asked her if she had a locker, she said yes. Then why do you get ready & put your stuff back here? Because this is the only non-smoking area and I don't like smoke and besides, I got here first! Ughh, no you didn't get here first. Maybe you walked in 30 min before we did but you didn't get here first! I told her that we have a locker back here, that these are the spots we've been getting ready at since the beginning and we need this area to get ready at. She had the nerve to tell me and the other girls that we should move!!!!! I said "No, you need to move where your locker is, period!"

    Dancer K has been getting ready at that same spot for like 10 yrs, Dancer E like 4 yrs, Dancer M like 2 yrs and me almost 2. We never had any problems until the past 8 wks maybe at the most!

    Then she got up and huffed & puffed away. I pretty much then ignored her because she's been pissing me off for a looooong time now with this and I was so ready to just clock the crap out of her. I thought it was an unwritten rule that you earn your place on the DR table, you don't just invade! WHen I first started I asked every girl around me if it was ok if I put my things there, if it wasn't, I moved. If a girl came in that normally got ready there, I moved! I was sooo respectful of the other girls spaces who had more seniority, wtf is up with these new bitches thinking they own the place? The problem we're facing is our club is on a firing spree and everyone's afraid to say anything or complain to the managers about anyone. How do we (me and the other girls around me sick of this problem) deal with this? Do we just keep doing what we're doing by moving her crap over and out of the way? She thinks because she gets there at 8pm she has seniority on where who's stuff goes where. What dingbatt obviously doesn't get is that doesn't matter!!!! Either get a locker back here when one opens up or go back to your own locker. If everyone keeps doing this, the entire club is going to be getting ready on our row! Help, before I tear her head off!!!!!

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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    Ooops, sorry, accidentally put in wrong forum. Mods, please move to SG, sorry for inconvenience!

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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    I once had a similar problem. we had atiny dressing room, four "house girls" (2 or more years @ the club), and new girls coming all the time. The four of us had our regular spots to do hair and make-up. If someone siddled up, we would be polite, but after a while we got some major attitudes. We all decided to get stickers to "mark our territory", a lot more sanitary than peeing on the floor, I thought. My name is dazie so I had dazie stickers, crystal had crystaly stickers, angel, angels and so on. I don't know if your club allows that but it worked out well. No one could dispute it.

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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    Are there enough spots in the non-smoking area for everyone who wants to be in there? I can see where it could cause problems if they didn't.

    I have a similar problem when arriving at work. It's not that I have MY spot or anything, but at 6:00 when I get there the day girls are all hanging out in the dressing room gabbing and doing nothing. And they smoke like chimneys. It is extremely difficult to get my makeup on with smoke practically being blown in my face. And god forbid I say something about it, that just makes them smoke more. They also leave all of their smelly, nasty food dishes and glasses all over the counter for other people to clean up. And of course, I have to hear how awful of a day they all had, which is just what you want to hear when you are getting ready.

    All I want to do is get ready, but lately I'm thinking I'd be better off doing my makeup at home (even though I kill some time at work doing it there).

    I wish we had a non-smoking DR.

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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    Crazy as it may be (and be honest ladies, it is kind of silly) in every club I've ever worked at there is a sort of unwritten rule in the dressing room regarding "spots" and club seniority. I think it is more of a courtesy than anything else, and the new girls copping attitudes in the DR need to be made aware that it isn't acceptable behavior. I'm not talking about an ass kicking, rather simply being firm about it. "This is where my locker is, this is where I sit to get ready, and I've been doing it for X number of years. Do not continually invade my space." Ask her to move her things...if she doesn't, do it for her...after a few times she's bound to get the picture. If she is stupid enough to raise hell about it, or cause problems she'll be the one getting fired in which case your problem will have solved itself.
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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    ^^^^^^^^^That's what I thought too! Better to keep moving it and if she freaks out...oh well, out she'll go.
    “What a caterpillar calls the end of the world we call a butterfly.” - ECKHART TOLLE

  7. #7
    Darcy Foxx
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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    That's a shitty situation. At my club we have 2 DR's, one for podium girls, and one for showgirls. Thankfully, in the showgirl room, we all have designated spots to sit with our own locker and mirror and everything. When I was new though, before I had a spot of my own, I only ever sat in the place of a girl who wasn't working that night, and if I accidentally got in someone's way I moved immediately.

    All clubs have their own etiquette regarding this situation, and it seems like these new girls don't understand that yet. I think you just need to tell these girls, without being aggressive or nasty, that this is how things are and that they need to understand that or they'll cause problems.

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    Featured Member Kalligirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    I feel the "spot" rule is the stupidest, pettiest, bullshit thing ever. I have workd at my home club for 4 years and everyone has their usual spots, but nobody gets catty over them at all. We have drama up the ying yang, and dancers that have worked their 10+ yrs, but nobody really cares about where they get ready. I had women before curse me out over me sitting in their spot, and I would just give them this weird look like... is it THAT big of a deal? Just be polite and ask me to move, or write your name on the damn seat. Shit.

    But I mean, I've never had anyone disrespect my personal space or want to take up a whole section of a DR so I can see where you are coming from.

  9. #9
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    I worked at a club once (actually, I was one of the girls who worked there since it was brand new) where all of the regular girls had stations to get ready at. They were partitioned off and had a chair at each. One of my friends and I shared, and we put up pics of our kids, artwork our kids had done and other personal effects. We even wrote our names on the mirror. Some new girl came in before me and tried to pull that, "I was here first" crap with me. I just moved her stuff when she was on stage, because yes, in fact, my name was on that station!!

    You should find a way to 'mark' your territory. The stickers are a nice idea.

    Too bad your management won't institute a no smoking policy for the entire dressing room.

  10. #10
    AudreyLeigh
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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    Quote Originally Posted by Kalligirl View Post
    I feel the "spot" rule is the stupidest, pettiest, bullshit thing ever. I have workd at my home club for 4 years and everyone has their usual spots, but nobody gets catty over them at all. We have drama up the ying yang, and dancers that have worked their 10+ yrs, but nobody really cares about where they get ready. I had women before curse me out over me sitting in their spot, and I would just give them this weird look like... is it THAT big of a deal? Just be polite and ask me to move, or write your name on the damn seat. Shit.

    But I mean, I've never had anyone disrespect my personal space or want to take up a whole section of a DR so I can see where you are coming from.
    Bingo. Who cares? Its really a small petty thing. Youre going to get into a bad mood over where you put your makeup on? Big deal. Ive never been one to care. Ill sit where theres room. If someone else wants to be petty about a spot Ill move. No problem. Its not that big of a deal.

    Id rather expend my energy hustling guys rather than fighting over where to set my makeup...

  11. #11
    Callyish
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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    Why not do your makeup at home? Have yourself set and ready so you just have to walk in, put your outfit on and walk out? Seriously the whole fighting over 'this is my spot' thing is kind of pre-schoolish. Just be the bigger person.

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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    Quote Originally Posted by Kalligirl View Post
    I feel the "spot" rule is the stupidest, pettiest, bullshit thing ever. I have workd at my home club for 4 years and everyone has their usual spots, but nobody gets catty over them at all. We have drama up the ying yang, and dancers that have worked their 10+ yrs, but nobody really cares about where they get ready. I had women before curse me out over me sitting in their spot, and I would just give them this weird look like... is it THAT big of a deal? Just be polite and ask me to move, or write your name on the damn seat. Shit.

    But I mean, I've never had anyone disrespect my personal space or want to take up a whole section of a DR so I can see where you are coming from.

    See, I disagree. I don't feel it is petty at all, considering I have went on MY own and purchased MY own things. Such as a cabinet for my clothes, mirrors so i can get ready, a stool so I can sit and apply makeup and do my hair, a rug so I don't have to touch the nasty floor, etc... I don't want some chick I do not know all over MY possessions. I purchased them from my own money, brought them in and spend 4 hours building them and getting things in order, ya know?
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    Callyish
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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    Well if there are that many non smoking girls why don't the group of you approach management and ask to make another section of the changing room non smoking?

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    AudreyLeigh
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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    Quote Originally Posted by kitana View Post
    See, I disagree. I don't feel it is petty at all, considering I have went on MY own and purchased MY own things. Such as a cabinet for my clothes, mirrors so i can get ready, a stool so I can sit and apply makeup and do my hair, a rug so I don't have to touch the nasty floor, etc... I don't want some chick I do not know all over MY possessions. I purchased them from my own money, brought them in and spend 4 hours building them and getting things in order, ya know?
    Whoa - you brought all this shit to the SC? Ive never heard of that before

    Quote Originally Posted by Callyish
    Well if there are that many non smoking girls why don't the group of you approach management and ask to make another section of the changing room non smoking?
    yup. was thinking the same thing.

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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    Quote Originally Posted by Kalligirl View Post
    I feel the "spot" rule is the stupidest, pettiest, bullshit thing ever. I have workd at my home club for 4 years and everyone has their usual spots, but nobody gets catty over them at all. We have drama up the ying yang, and dancers that have worked their 10+ yrs, but nobody really cares about where they get ready. I had women before curse me out over me sitting in their spot, and I would just give them this weird look like... is it THAT big of a deal? Just be polite and ask me to move, or write your name on the damn seat. Shit.

    But I mean, I've never had anyone disrespect my personal space or want to take up a whole section of a DR so I can see where you are coming from.
    see i agree with this too.

    Quote Originally Posted by kitana View Post
    See, I disagree. I don't feel it is petty at all, considering I have went on MY own and purchased MY own things. Such as a cabinet for my clothes, mirrors so i can get ready, a stool so I can sit and apply makeup and do my hair, a rug so I don't have to touch the nasty floor, etc... I don't want some chick I do not know all over MY possessions. I purchased them from my own money, brought them in and spend 4 hours building them and getting things in order, ya know?
    clearly this is a totally diffrent situation.
    i too have never heard of this either.

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    Featured Member Kalligirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    Quote Originally Posted by kitana View Post
    See, I disagree. I don't feel it is petty at all, considering I have went on MY own and purchased MY own things. Such as a cabinet for my clothes, mirrors so i can get ready, a stool so I can sit and apply makeup and do my hair, a rug so I don't have to touch the nasty floor, etc... I don't want some chick I do not know all over MY possessions. I purchased them from my own money, brought them in and spend 4 hours building them and getting things in order, ya know?
    Well, that is a totally dif thing. Thats yooo sheit. a DR is a communal area, and I have found that in clubs where you are not allowed to put pictures up, stickers, etc the DR never has problems. For example, the club I spoke about used to have tags and what not all over the place, now they rennovated and nobody is allowed to put anything up. Girls put stuff up inside their lockers, but thats the only place its allowed. But when I was yelled at, and I remember both times very well because I had no clue the spots were "taken" and was spoken to like I just stole money out of their garters, it just was... laughable. The places I have worked where girls are very terroritorial turned out to be very cut throat and unplesant work environments. Hmm. Maybe the DR says a lot about a club!

    But anyway, to the OP, I would just ignore the girl and like Audrey said focus your energy to a more positive outlet, rather than some brat that has no respect or concideration for other people.

  17. #17
    StrayStripper
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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    Continue to move stuff out of the way. It's rude for any girl to leave her shit all over the counter.

    To clarify why the OP is upset, I have to tell you that the dressing room is HUGE. There are about 200 dancers and a FULL SIZE locker for every dancer. There are rows upon rows upon rows to get ready. The dancers get ready at work because there is a hair stylist, a makeup artist, a tanning bed, spray tanning, showers, and anything else you could think of. Getting ready at home is almost unheard of.

    There is tons of space to get ready and it is not smoky. The OP has a locker in the non-smoking section and she'd just like to get ready where her locker is and where no one else's crap is in the way.

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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    Oh yeah, I bought/brought it all, lol.

    This is my home club, I have been here almost 4yrs, and originally it was a DR/beer storage room, lol!

    It took 3 1/2 - 4 yrs to even get a small row of 16 lockers in the very back.

    So girls brought foot lockers, trunks, etc...

    It's pretty much like this with doors and an added lock.

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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    Quote Originally Posted by StrayStripper View Post
    Continue to move stuff out of the way. It's rude for any girl to leave her shit all over the counter.

    To clarify why the OP is upset, I have to tell you that the dressing room is HUGE. There are about 200 dancers and a FULL SIZE locker for every dancer. There are rows upon rows upon rows to get ready. The dancers get ready at work because there is a hair stylist, a makeup artist, a tanning bed, spray tanning, showers, and anything else you could think of. Getting ready at home is almost unheard of.

    There is tons of space to get ready and it is not smoky. The OP has a locker in the non-smoking section and she'd just like to get ready where her locker is and where no one else's crap is in the way.
    Thank you for explaining my side a little better! Yes, our DR is very big and it's just irritating that a few girls, one in particular doesn't think about how others feel. All the girls get ready where their locker is, it's a matter of convenience. I'm not going to get ready on the other side of the DR to have to constantly walk back & forth to get into my locker. If it was a matter of this is the only area that has a mirror and table, then I'd understand her getting ready there. But she has a locker, I've explained to her that I get ready in such in such area because my locker is here. Her answer/attitude is "So what!!!! You should move!" And I'm not a space hog, I get ready and when I'm finished I put most of my stuff away expect for what I might need to touch up with like lipstick, blush, hairspray, etc. It's most common for girls to bring a lot of their own stuff and not use the house mom's like they do in some clubs.

    And it's not that I mind if she gets ready in the row, it's how disrespectful she is of everyone's space. She thinks since she walked in the door first that gives her every right to take up as much room as possible and not share the space and when she's got a locker somewhere else she can get ready. Our row wasn't made for the entire club to hang out at, we've got a lot of girls in our club and if everyone decided to get ready on the non-smoking row, nobody could move. That's why the DR has plenty of lockers and plenty of space for everyone, it's not made for the entire club to get ready in one spot.

    Before I moved into the locker I'm in now, I was in another locker/area that I got ready in. I didn't bring my big old suitcase, big old makeup bag, etc,. to another area of the club and push other girls out who normally get ready there.

    And why I see this as a problem is I need a small amount of space to put my stuff (even if I were to get ready at home). I need an area to put my "touch up" makeup at, if DR hog crowds up 2 seats worth, where are you going to put anything, even your lipstick?

    I realize this is a smaller problem compared to other things and some of you girls may see this a being petty, however, there was NEVER a problem until this particular girl came along. Not only did she come back there and crowd us, she recruited a bunch of her friends, so many of us who've been back in that area and are used to having a spot to put our lipstick, hairspray, clothes, etc. are now having to worry about it before we come in "Am I going to have a place to put my clothes tonight or am I going to have to fight with Miss Bitch".

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    Senior Member anabella's Avatar
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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    I think there are a lot of possible ways to deal with this, but besides beating the shit out of this girl, dumping something on her belongings to get your point across, or ignoring it (that doesn't seem like an option for you), you should:

    1. Get there first if it's that important

    2. If it's that important and you just can't get there first, then complain to the housemom or manager until it's fixed.

    I've been at my club for a year and a half, and yes, I have a place that I prefer to get ready in. All the day girls leave their crap all over the counter. If I get there and I need the space, I just shove their stuff down the counter. If I get there and someone else is in my spot, I pick a new spot. You should probably just be grateful that you have any room at all to get ready in. I've gotten changed in a corner many times.

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    God/dess Mare's Avatar
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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    I always ask where it is ok to put my stuff when I start someplace new. It is just less of a hassle. Why piss everyone off that way? Plus I like to have my own space that someone else isn't foaming at the mouth about. I am very flexible, unfortunately some people are just crass.

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    Default Re: DR issue. HOw to handle? Rant & little long!

    Quote Originally Posted by Mare View Post
    I always ask where it is ok to put my stuff when I start someplace new. It is just less of a hassle. Why piss everyone off that way? Plus I like to have my own space that someone else isn't foaming at the mouth about. I am very flexible, unfortunately some people are just crass.

    Thank you! This is all we're asking for, we were considerate in that way when we were new, we're just asking the same out of the new girls now. You don't start in any job or any environment acting like you're head of the house, you EARN your way there with giving respect to the ones that have been there longer than you.

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