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Thread: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

  1. #1
    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
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    Default WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Last night I went out with a guy I met here..I had him take me to Safeway so I could get a few things but, my main purpose was to get flowers. As many of you know I've had a rough couple of weeks and really needed to be cheered up. I've been wanting to fill the room with flowers since I first arrived in Honolulu but, refrained cuz my roomie commented on every penny I spent.

    So now that she's gone I thought what the hell, I'm going to start treating myself. That and I haven't gotten a get better card, a balloon or anything..
    So whatever..Anyway, I picked out 2 dozen roses @ $14 each ( dirt cheap IMO), a vase @ $5 ( again dirt cheap IMO), local flowers @ $7.99 & $3.99 and a vase $8.99. Not one time did this guy offer to buy me any of the flowers..He struck me as a broke loser or maybe he was wanted to get to know me before he did whatever..Who knows,Who cares..

    We get to the register, the bill is rung up and everything including my groceries came to $104..
    You should've heard this guys response..I was totally fucking turned off.

    Gesh, I had even thought about giving him some..(I've been horny as hell since my piercing has healed. And he's very fit ) On the way home he passes by a stripclub and an adult book store, which I think he did to see what my response would be..
    When I didn't say anything about it of course he mentions them.

    I came home arranged my flowers, took a bath, masturbated to him eating my kat and went to sleep. (I might as well get something out of it..LOL )
    In my mind he was simply another one who bit the dust.

    He called me tonight while I'm on SW, I'm trying to multi-task but, ended up focusing more on the board and ended my call with him. I called him back and he started in on the flowers again..OMG, I went off. I told him that commenting on what others spend their $$ on is rudeand beyond inappropriate..Gesh he's calling me now, I just let it go to VM..Anyway, I went on to say what I spend my $$ is my business and it's not like I asked him or he offered to cover my bill,so what business is it of his. I also went on to say that not one time did I mention the CAR SEAT that was in the backseat, I didn't mention it cuz I didn't care..

    Guys can be so fucking stupid sometimes !
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    ugh! and you KNOW he drove by the club/book store on purpose! and how slimey of him to MENTION them! I'm assuming your stripperness is a secret there?


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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Car seat? Totally a bitter, has to pay child support, tight in the wallet weekender dad. Okay, a generalization, but that's been my experience.

    Totally not his business if you want to spend on flowers. Or Godiva, books, booze, crack, whatever. Especially on first date. Isn't that the time to establish common interests and stuff, not peruse their old tax returns or something?

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    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Quote Originally Posted by LoveSexMoney View Post
    ugh! and you KNOW he drove by the club/book store on purpose! and how slimey of him to MENTION them! I'm assuming your stripperness is a secret there?

    Yes, my profession was never mentioned..No, I'm wrong it was and I told him I was a designer, which I am also..IMO the only people who need to know I dance are the ones paying me in the club.

    OMG..What a loser ! He could hit the jackpot if he'd only played it right. Fucking idiot.

    At least I found out about a new club..Wow, he's calling me AGAIN !
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


  5. #5
    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Quote Originally Posted by RoseLeigh View Post
    Car seat? Totally a bitter, has to pay child support, tight in the wallet weekender dad. Okay, a generalization, but that's been my experience.

    Totally not his business if you want to spend on flowers. Or Godiva, books, booze, crack, whatever. Especially on first date. Isn't that the time to establish common interests and stuff, not peruse their old tax returns or something?
    OMG, he's calling yet again ..

    So you think he's a weekend dad ?? You're most likely 100% correct in your take on him. I just acted like the carseat wasn't there, any smart dude would've had the sense to remove it in the first place.

    To me when someone comments on others money they either 1. don't have any, 2. want yours, 3. they need not be in my world.
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


  6. #6
    BrunetteGoddess
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Or in this guy's case: all 3

  7. #7
    Senior Member GentlemanX's Avatar
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Ahhh... Where to begin. This is so entertaining.

    Some of the other stuff he did was really weird and commenting on how you spend your money isn't right. But, that would be an awkward situation if a girl I'm taking on a date for the first time asks to go to the store and has a bill of over a hundred dollars. I would offer to buy flowers, but if you are shopping for lots of stuff and we just met, am I supposed to spend a hundred bucks on a girl's groceries on a first date? Buying all the flowers alone is more than a romantic guesture. I wouldn't pay for house decorations on a first date and wouldn't expect to be in the situation where if I don't then I look like a cheapass.

    I prefer to take a girl on a date, spending money on things that help us get to know each other. Gifts come on the second date or after depending on the situation. And really, Safeway, on a first date (or any getting to know you date)?

    And maybe the reason he is calling you back is because you let him get intimate with your private parts. That might have sent a signal that you are into him. lol.

    This post illustrates I will never fully understand the way women think. lol.

  8. #8
    Callyish
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    She never slept with him.... she was playing with her parts thinking about him eating her out (or thats how I read it lol maybe im wrong)

    Also umm ugh im not even going to get started...

    Farrah sorry your having such a shitty run of luck lately *hugs*

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    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Quote Originally Posted by BrunetteGoddess View Post
    Or in this guy's case: all 3
    Thanks babe ! He's fucking calling again ! LOL
    Yeah, he wasn't a keeper..He works for a local time agency..But, like Rose said the child support is probably killing him. Yet another reason the wear condoms if you don't want that expense.
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


  10. #10
    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Quote Originally Posted by Callyish View Post
    She never slept with him.... she was playing with her parts thinking about him eating her out (or thats how I read it lol maybe im wrong)

    Also umm ugh im not even going to get started...

    Farrah sorry your having such a shitty run of luck lately *hugs*
    I need a hug. The flowers have brightened the room and I'm feeling better because of them. In hinesight I'm glad he showed me his true colors BEFORE I did the deed..I might have been upset with myself if I'd learned he was a loser after the fact..Ya' know .
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Dear guy: Stop calling Farrah! Is he that lonely and desperate? Maybe time to pick up (I'm assuming you're ducking the calls?) and tell him to never, ever, ever call back. And that you are on the way to the florist's right now to buy a million dollars of flowers.

    I usually leave the 'errands date' for later, but maybe this a good way to weed out the wierdos?

  12. #12
    Callyish
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    A hug for you Farrah!!


  13. #13
    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Quote Originally Posted by GentlemanX View Post
    Ahhh... Where to begin. This is so entertaining.

    Some of the other stuff he did was really weird and commenting on how you spend your money isn't right. But, that would be an awkward situation if a girl I'm taking on a date for the first time asks to go to the store and has a bill of over a hundred dollars. I would offer to buy flowers, but if you are shopping for lots of stuff and we just met, am I supposed to spend a hundred bucks on a girl's groceries on a first date? Buying all the flowers alone is more than a romantic guesture. I wouldn't pay for house decorations on a first date and wouldn't expect to be in the situation where if I don't then I look like a cheapass.

    I prefer to take a girl on a date, spending money on things that help us get to know each other. Gifts come on the second date or after depending on the situation. And really, Safeway, on a first date (or any getting to know you date)?

    And maybe the reason he is calling you back is because you let him get intimate with your private parts. That might have sent a signal that you are into him. lol.

    This post illustrates I will never fully understand the way women think. lol.
    We'd gone for a walk on the beach and I'd told him that I needed to go to the store during an early convo to get flowers and other things. I'm in Waikiki, everything is expensive here ! A half gallon of OJ is $7 !

    WE DIDN'T HAVE SEX !! I masturbated to THOUGHTS of him..I suggest you REREAD the OP.

    At least you would've offered to buy flowers. A dozen roses is usually $30+.
    It's good to see you're a gentleman, just one who needs to get a good grasp on the situation before posting. I believe your other head kept you from doing that.
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


  14. #14
    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Quote Originally Posted by RoseLeigh View Post
    Dear guy: Stop calling Farrah! Is he that lonely and desperate? Maybe time to pick up (I'm assuming you're ducking the calls?) and tell him to never, ever, ever call back. And that you are on the way to the florist's right now to buy a million dollars of flowers.

    I usually leave the 'errands date' for later, but maybe this a good way to weed out the wierdos?

    Thanks Rose ! I'm not ducking his calls as much as I don't feel like being bothered. My time on SW is my personal time, ya' know..This is something I do for me..I don't feel like hearing his shit right now. I give so much of myself to others and many don't appreciate it. I blow off another dinner date to hang out with them cuz, I liked he's convo. I mentioned that while I was telling him off. THAT'S probably why he's calling.

    I've spent so much on cabs here it's ridiclous and I'm at the point in my life that like you said I'm ready to weed out the weirdos. So I'm just being me and if others have a prob w/ it that's there issues, not mine.


    I had one who stopped me on my way to the mall yesterday, he asked me out and I said sure but, I have to get these shoes I saw at Aldo that were on sale. He tagged a long and before you know it I was looking for a way to dump him too. Luckily MM called, I talked to her instead of listening to him.
    Out of the blue he said something about can we hook up and get busy later. ..Now I wasn't attracted to him AT ALL..So I said hell no, lose my number.
    He then called me back and said something about meeting up now cuz he wasn't going to be on my end later..I was like "DID I ASK YOU TO CALL ME !" And he hung up, he hasn't called back since, thankfully ! Too bad this jerk doens't follow in his footsteps
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


  15. #15
    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Quote Originally Posted by Callyish View Post
    A hug for you Farrah!!

    Aw Callyish you're the best ! The kitties are so cute.
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Hey wonderful Farrah,

    Seems to me it would be a guy's job, especially after the time you've been through, to bring a sense of joy into your life--not stand around and watch you buy flowers for yourself and then troll by the places to suggest his own gratification. You need to find a guy who honors you, gets you the flowers and chocolate and cards and lets that be just the beginning of a night which brings you back to some joy and restores you.

    You're the best, and you deserve the best--and you know I am rooting for you!
    JK Jim

  17. #17
    cameron_keys
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    What did he say in the store/ now I'm curious!

    What a loser. You dont answer him so he blows up your phone??? I HATE HATE HATE people who do that. Leave a message..if i dont call you back..get the hint. I'm not going to fall in love on the 700th phone call dude.

    And I wouldnt have expected him to pay the grocery bill either...but if he liked you and wanted to impress ou a cool thng would hav ebeen "oh...you like flowers?(grabs pretty bunch)..thhen this bunch is from me..maybe you can keep it by your bed so you think of me before you fall asleep tonight"

    THAT would have been cool and romantic and cost him a whole $20.


    But no...not only didnt he do that..he BITCHED about what you spent YOUR money on?????? WTF???

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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Quote Originally Posted by GentlemanX View Post
    Ahhh... Where to begin. This is so entertaining.

    Some of the other stuff he did was really weird and commenting on how you spend your money isn't right. But, that would be an awkward situation if a girl I'm taking on a date for the first time asks to go to the store and has a bill of over a hundred dollars. I would offer to buy flowers, but if you are shopping for lots of stuff and we just met, am I supposed to spend a hundred bucks on a girl's groceries on a first date? Buying all the flowers alone is more than a romantic guesture. I wouldn't pay for house decorations on a first date and wouldn't expect to be in the situation where if I don't then I look like a cheapass.

    I prefer to take a girl on a date, spending money on things that help us get to know each other. Gifts come on the second date or after depending on the situation. And really, Safeway, on a first date (or any getting to know you date)?

    And maybe the reason he is calling you back is because you let him get intimate with your private parts. That might have sent a signal that you are into him. lol.

    This post illustrates I will never fully understand the way women think. lol.
    From another guy's perspective, I agree. The guy was a douche for a bunch of his actions (especially the stripclub/adult book store comments), but taking a guy shopping on a first date sends a lot of weird signals. He should not have commented on the amount spent, but he may have felt backed into a corner and reacted the wrong way. Also (and this may sound weird), but shopping for groceries is sort of intimate in that you're letting a guy into your daily routine, which may have also caught him off guard. I'm sure that I'm missing some facts, so maybe the comments are off base...so sorry if they are.

  19. #19
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Quote Originally Posted by cameron_keys View Post
    What did he say in the store/ now I'm curious!
    Do tell!!

  20. #20
    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Quote Originally Posted by jhuka View Post
    Hey wonderful Farrah,

    Seems to me it would be a guy's job, especially after the time you've been through, to bring a sense of joy into your life--not stand around and watch you buy flowers for yourself and then troll by the places to suggest his own gratification. You need to find a guy who honors you, gets you the flowers and chocolate and cards and lets that be just the beginning of a night which brings you back to some joy and restores you.

    You're the best, and you deserve the best--and you know I am rooting for you!
    My thoughts exactly ! Even though I'm progressive in my thinking and my profession..Yes, I am an independent woman . I still want to be courted, treat me with respect, wine and dine me, let me get to know you as a gentleman. Not an asshole !

    I called him on his behaviour the 10th time he phoned. I told him he knew how rough my week had been and he should've been the one to be there for me instead of nit picking my spending..I also told him that he reminded my of the idiot who hit me with his crap. I let him know I don't need a controling asshole in my life. Period. So he decided to call me 3 more times.
    I had walked to a Vietnamese place to oick up my take-out order, he called 2 while I was there. I decided to take the call, so I'm placing the order and he's making comments about please give him a chance etc. I'm like dude, I'll call you back. 3 minutes later the celly rings again, it's him of course..Whining again, he'd been ultra ballsy early..So I'm wondering what happened to that person.. Now that you see I'm not some weak woman, you change your approach ?? Please ! Anyway, I told him that I'd call him and to stop calling me.. As soon I walked through the door of course the phone rings, now he's saying don't shoot us in the foot.. WTF ?? I'm getting annoyed at this point..
    I've had enough and this is the main reason, I don't date.
    I told him there is NO us and he'd done a fine job or ruining any chances of there being a connection. Thankfully he didn't call back.

    I did however get a call from the guy I blew off, he'd invited me out to a dinner with him and his collegues from work. I didn't go cuz, I thought there would be a lot of drinking and thats not my cup of tea. Anyway, I told him I wasn't feeling well, he shared an old cold remedy with me that made me feel better instantly. So, I decided to meet him and go for a walk. He ended up buying me a necklace, bracelet, earings and 3 matching toe rings. All of which I think I should give back to him today, minus the toe rings. He was going to buy them for me originally but, the sales woman kinda pressured him in the beginning to get the other stuff..I was like thats okay, let's go and he said wait if you give it to me for x dollars I'll buy it. They did and he bought it for me. We also went out to dinner afterwards and had a great time. It's obvious that he wants something more, he's really nice and smart but, so not my type.

    He mentioned something about he didn't want to spend too much cuz he needed to eat this week. I don't want him to have to make any sacrafices due to overspending and start resenting me. What do you all think..Give it back or keep it ??
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


  21. #21
    BrunetteGoddess
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Wow Farrah...just...wow.

  22. #22
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Keep the gifts. He bought them because he wanted you to have them.

  23. #23
    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Quote Originally Posted by cameron_keys View Post
    What did he say in the store/ now I'm curious!

    What a loser. You dont answer him so he blows up your phone??? I HATE HATE HATE people who do that. Leave a message..if i dont call you back..get the hint. I'm not going to fall in love on the 700th phone call dude.

    And I wouldnt have expected him to pay the grocery bill either...but if he liked you and wanted to impress you a cool thng would have been "oh...you like flowers?(grabs pretty bunch)..thhen this bunch is from me..maybe you can keep it by your bed so you think of me before you fall asleep tonight"

    THAT would have been cool and romantic and cost him a whole $20.


    But no...not only didnt he do that..he BITCHED about what you spent YOUR money on?????? WTF???
    CK, we're seeing eye to eye on this hon ! I buy flowers for chicks like..Hell, I buy them for people in general, I'm learning I'm a freak of nature. To me if someone is down, I'll do my best to lift them back up..Isn't that what lifes about ? Helping out our brothers and sisters.

    He said something like "you're going to buy all those flowers ??!!" "I've never been with anyone whose bought flowers before", he's not a spring chicken. I never asked his age but, he's retired military and has to be at least in his middle to late 40's maybe older. My dating window is 27 - ??..People are people and age doesn't really matter. Anyway, this goes on and I'm like okay no wonder you're divorced..I asked if he ever bought chocolate,flowers,etc for his wife and he said " no, she didn't like anything"
    He also made a bizarre comment about a bouquet of flowers I'd asked his opinion on, he said "those are ______ people roses ! I replied with " I didn't know roses had a race, and if they did.. these actually came from Colombia..So wouldn't these be Columbian roses then." He laughed

    I never asked him to foot my bill but, he'd have done much better by just picking up a single rose and giving it to me..You don't have to spend oodles of cash to catch my eye. I know most people don't make as much money as I do. As A I workers we make more than your average Jane, even w/ my degrees dancing still pays more. And it's more exciting than a 9-5..

    I was sure to tell him again the zillionenth time he called that I'm independant and since I never asked him to buy me anything I didn't appreciate his comments.. and I take that back he didn't stop calling, when I got back to my room he called at least 3 more times. When my phone rang the 4th time, I looked at it prepared to tell him off again but, luckily it was Glenn ( the other guy).
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


  24. #24
    BrunetteGoddess
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    At least your life sounds like it's hardly ever boring!

  25. #25
    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: WTF!?!?! Next ! A 1st date story..

    Quote Originally Posted by Glamazon View Post
    Keep the gifts. He bought them because he wanted you to have them.
    Okay..I'll keep, them they do look cute. I just wasn't sure if they came with strings attached. I'm used to being bought nice gifts but, I don't need anything that comes with expectations..Ya' know ?
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


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