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Thread: What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

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    Member Mimi Mae's Avatar
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    Default What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

    Sorry if this topic has come up before. I looked through the last 10 pages of topics but it's not something I can search for.

    Last night was quiet and I only found one pair of guys who were good for a dance with me now and then, so I was talking to them quite a bit. They were generally good fun but they sometimes said stuff like "X is really annoying, isn't she?". I said things like "don't say that, I like her" (in the case of "X" I said something like "she's just really young, but I like her". I regret implying that I agreed a little bit). I suppose they were shit-stirring, but since they weren't saying anything that bad and they were nice otherwise I let it slide.

    I was just wondering how you girls deal with those situations. I've only just stopped being uncomfortable with being told I'm the best/hottest dancer, I really don't want to hear guys talking shit about the girls.

  2. #2
    Darcy Foxx
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    Default Re: What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

    i generally just slap them playfully and say, "be nice!"

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    Default Re: What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

    If you like her, defend them or tell them, or do what Darcy said. If you don't like them I always pull the "I don't know her really well so I wouldn't know."


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    Default Re: What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

    I tell them not to. I say "hey! We don't say mean things about dancers here. We say nice things or we maintain a conspicuous silence."
    I have taught that the sky in all its zones is mortal and its substance was formed by a process of birth

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    Default Re: What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

    ^^Good one. I also pay attention to what they are saying and who they are saying it about, in case it's a red flag for me. A surprising ammount, customers are complaining to me that a dancer was "rude" when "all I tried to do was touch her down there." This really floors me. First, I now know that they're going to try to grope me. Moreover, they seem to be asking me to agree with them that the girl is "rude" and to validate what they did. More often than not, if a guy says something like this, I start looking around for someone else to sit with. Similarly, if guys complain that a girl is "all about the money" that may be hint that this particular customer isn't tipping very well.

    In your situation, sounds like the guys were just saying things about other girls for the sake of being mean. You're right not to want to get involved. Joining the negativity can't do any good, and you never know when what you say will get back to the other girl, possibly via that same customer. Be playful and change the subject. After all, you don't want their attention, good or bad, on some other girl. You want their attention on YOU.

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    Featured Member Sunshine73's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Taylorlila View Post
    If you like her, defend them or tell them, or do what Darcy said. If you don't like them I always pull the "I don't know her really well so I wouldn't know."


    I do the same exact thing.
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    Maria Callas said it best: "When my critics stop hissing, I shall know I'm slipping."

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    Default Re: What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

    If a guy insults a girl, like says a girl is too fat or any other kind of insult, I'll say something like "well she does have beautiful eyes though, or she's a phenomenal dancer, or but don't you just love her long beautiful hair?" I'll match his insult with a compliment. Never agree with them.

  8. #8
    Lola Rose
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    Default Re: What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

    I always say it's not nice to say mean things, it's much nicer to get dances for the girl you Do like, me!

    they usually laugh, and get dances

    if they're bad again I'll say hey, what did I tell you! You beter be good, or I'm gonna have to give you a spanking! (especially good to say if he's with friends!)

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    Default Re: What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

    I give them a weird look like they are blind and then I say, "Well, I'd hit it!"

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    God/dess Taylorlila's Avatar
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    Default Re: What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lola Rose View Post
    I always say it's not nice to say mean things, it's much nicer to get dances for the girl you Do like, me!

    they usually laugh, and get dances

    if they're bad again I'll say hey, what did I tell you! You beter be good, or I'm gonna have to give you a spanking! (especially good to say if he's with friends!)
    I love that one!


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    Default Re: What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

    I always act very shocked as say "I can't believe you just said that! That's sooo mean!"
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
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    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    Default Re: What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Mimi Mae View Post
    Sorry if this topic has come up before. I looked through the last 10 pages of topics but it's not something I can search for.

    Last night was quiet and I only found one pair of guys who were good for a dance with me now and then, so I was talking to them quite a bit. They were generally good fun but they sometimes said stuff like "X is really annoying, isn't she?". I said things like "don't say that, I like her" (in the case of "X" I said something like "she's just really young, but I like her". I regret implying that I agreed a little bit). I suppose they were shit-stirring, but since they weren't saying anything that bad and they were nice otherwise I let it slide.

    I was just wondering how you girls deal with those situations. I've only just stopped being uncomfortable with being told I'm the best/hottest dancer, I really don't want to hear guys talking shit about the girls.
    Best policy is to be diplomatic. You never know if he'll go back and tell her what you said.
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    Veteran Member BeBe's Avatar
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    Default Re: What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

    Whatever you do, don't participate in the dancer bashing. It may get back to her that you said the whole thing, you never know custys can be very messy and play sides.

    Negative drama from a custy about anyone else doesn't involve you. What it does is get you off the subject of what you really want, which is his/her money.

    So, if at all possible bring the conversation back to closing the sale. Put a positive spin on everything and if he/she is not interested move on...

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    Default Re: What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

    If it's someone I like I defend her, if it's someone who gets on my nerves I'll say, "No Comment," with a wink. And then I change the subject.

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    Default Re: What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

    It depends. If they criticize a girl for being too aggressive with their hustling or something, I just defend her to them by saying she's trying to make money. If they criticize looks, I'll usually just generically answer: "All the girls here are beautiful." But sometimes they really piss me off. One guy I was sitting with criticized two dancers, so I just said: 'My, aren't we in a critical mood tonight!" and then he rushed to apologize. I said: "What are you going to say about me after I've left?" He ended up getting a dance though...?

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    Default Re: What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Darcy Foxx View Post
    i generally just slap them playfully and say, "be nice!"
    so funny! that's what I do!
    This way, they stop saying mean things, aren't embarrassed and can't turn around and say that I gossip about the other dancers.
    Please don't lick me, it tickles..



  17. #17
    cameron_keys
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    Default Re: What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

    I HATE this. You dont have to put someone else down to make me feel better. I say really indignant "Thats my SISTER"

    Then when he stammers and says "she IS???" I say.."no, not really...but she could be.You dont know..so lets not be mean to the other girls shall we? ALl of us girls get along REALLY well here..wink wink...so we dont like it when a bad boy is mean to our friends Lets play nice with the naked girls shall we?"


    Of course...on the rare occassions he's talking about a bitch I hate i just smile and say nothing. But its a passive aggressive acceptance. Kind of like when Paris laughed at the Firecrotch rant...she didnt SAY anything, but it was obvious she agreed.

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    God/dess ViolaStrings's Avatar
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    Default Re: What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

    I act like I didn't hear them and change the subject. Not my problem either way, whether I like her or not, I don't want an opinion to stand in the way of a sale.

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    Senior Member Noneya's Avatar
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    Default Re: What do you do when a custie says negative stuff about other dancers?

    If the custy says something about someone I like, I defend her - in a non offensive tone of course.

    If a comment is made about someone I dislike, I keep quiet as well and just smile. Then back to closing the sale of a dance!

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