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Thread: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

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    Default quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    Alright, I have been thinking about quitting dancing for a little while now. I am getting sick of meeting new people and hustling. I don't have any troubles dealing with my regulars, in fact I really like them a lot. In fact, there are two that I would like to continue to entertain on a regular basis. Some people might think I am a dirty whore for even thinking this but I'm getting to the point where I really don't care what other people think. These two guys only come to see me (as far as I know) so I wouldn't be taking them away from anyone else. Both have hinted (hinted, not demanded, nor badgered...which is one reason why I like them, I feel there's some respect in that) that they want to meet me OTC. I'm fairly certain both would provide increased compensation were I to do that. At the amount of money I am getting from them right now, I would be happy to meet them OTC for dinner, cuddling and a lap-dancing style encounter, but that would be it. I'm not opposed to upping my contact level provided compensation increases.

    Is this crazy? I mean, if I take it OTC will that necessarily mean the end of money? I guess I'm hoping to kind of turn this into a sugardaddy/mistress kind of relationship. Is that even possible?


    Or maybe what I need to do is just try and cultivate some more regulars that I like. I don't know.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    Honestly, it sounds like you might be cut out to be a high class escort. Go independent and keep it out of the club. Do a google search for "Nikki Avalon" - Playboy named her the best escort in Vegas. Read her story. I have nothing against prostitutes. It's not for me, but it sounds like what you want to do.

    Oh, as for mistress/sugar daddy relationships - I've been there, done that. You go through a lot of emotional bull shit for very little compensation. They basically think of you as a hooker even if you really like them. You spend a lot of time on them, and are undercompensated. Good escorts in big cities can make at least $500 an hour (plus tips) and get a lot of repeat clientelle. Every second you work, you're compensated, unlike stripping, where the money is uncertain. Keep yourself safe and be smart.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    I'd say unless you're going to fuck them, they're not going to be into cuddling outside the club for long. They always want more. They are men, they can't help it. So maybe you can just use them for as long as you can then you'll be refreshed and ready to go back to the real club.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    Quote Originally Posted by ViolaStrings View Post
    Oh, as for mistress/sugar daddy relationships - I've been there, done that. You go through a lot of emotional bull shit for very little compensation. They basically think of you as a hooker even if you really like them. You spend a lot of time on them, and are undercompensated.
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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    i agree here, men can only handle OTC contact without sex for so long. if you want to do this while taking a break from dancing, then it may work!

    but not if you plan on stopping, period.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    Quote Originally Posted by NatalieFRPhilly View Post
    I'd say unless you're going to fuck them, they're not going to be into cuddling outside the club for long. They always want more. They are men, they can't help it. So maybe you can just use them for as long as you can then you'll be refreshed and ready to go back to the real club.
    I agree, but the OP already stated that she's willing to have increased $$ for increased contact and knows that that's a definite possibility.

    I think treating it as a possible break from the club and cultivating the OTC regular sounds like a good idea. Keep very close track of your finances so you know how it's really panning out. Good luck!

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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    Quote Originally Posted by NatalieFRPhilly View Post
    I'd say unless you're going to fuck them, they're not going to be into cuddling outside the club for long.
    True!







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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    Quote Originally Posted by oodlesofnoodles View Post
    . I'm not opposed to upping my contact level provided compensation increases.
    .
    Now that I re-read this, I agree with Viola. It does sound like your more interested in escorting instead of being a dancer. There are some forums out that are much like SW but geared toward escorts.







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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    i dont know. just because she said more contact that doesnt=sex.
    i know a few guys that would be thrilled just to have somone to come over, hang out and yes JUST dance. they would be happy to pay well for it too.
    ya'll are so fast to jump on the dirty hooker train.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    I wouldn't call it the dirty hooker train, I don't really see anything dirty about it...but it seems logical to me that beyond cuddling and lap dances, well...something "stimulating" is going on. But maybe that's just the inner guy in me. Not saying that there aren't guys out there who would enjoy just getting lap dances and spending time with a hot girl, etc. I just meant that she seems to be comfortable with things getting more physical.

    But yes, it does seem like you are more interested in being high end escort. And if you have the mental stamina for that and are comfortable with it, then go for it. Keep the custies away from the club if you decide to go back, and don't fish from the same pond (if you decide to go back).

    Be safe!




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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    I worded it the way that I did because I don't want to rush it. If they're happy with dancing and cuddling, then I'm definitely happy with that. But these two in particular, if after some time they wanted to do more, and they wanted to help me out more, I think that I could, and at least could consider it. With them. (And to be honest, I've had sex with guys I liked a lot less, who had nothing to contribute to my life beside headache and heartache, so it would probably be a step up for me. lol)

    So Viola's suggestion, about being an escort... is maybe much closer to what I was thinking of. Except I don't want to do it with lots of dudes, just a few that I like.. That's probably very naive of me, lol. But I already operate this way at work. I've gotten very selective about who I'll sit down with and that means that I get customers who I enjoy more.

    I know I have gone to customer's houses to do private shows before and it was exactly like doing dances in the club. So I know there are guys that do just want to have a pretty girl come over and dance for them or sit and chat, or go out to dinner.

    I guess what my dilemma is right now... is since these guys are used to come see me at the club, what they are paying for is like... the chase, right? Because I never give it up. But then eventually if I did give it up, maybe they wouldn't have any interest in me any more, and I am interested in maintaining this longer-term relationship.

    So then I think, maybe it's a bad idea to change things. I'm not getting any pressure from them to change things. I'm not totally sure I want to change things. But then again, I do get so tired of having to meet new guys over and over. I like to put my energy on people I already know.

    Anyhow I'm going out for coffee with one of the guys, and the other probably to dinner. Just to see if I even feel comfortable meeting them otc, cause who knows, I may not. I've gone out to coffee or dinner before and this usually has a beneficial result, so I'm not too worried about that.


    also: if I did end up doing anything with these guys, I would keep them away from the club, and if I did go back to dancing, I wouldn't do it that way again. Its just that I happen to like these two guys and... I already know them.
    Last edited by oodlesofnoodles; 10-31-2007 at 02:05 PM. Reason: clarity

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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    Do you work in the type of club where you could go in just every now and then? And maybe go in when one of these guys wants to come see you? Do they pay you enough to live off of just that? (not trying to be nosy, you don't need to answer that, just something to think about).

    If you do decide to go the escort route, I woould think unless you get really lucky you'de have to have more than a couple of clients.




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    Featured Member NatalieFRPhilly's Avatar
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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    I don't know why we are getting crap for this supposed "dirty hooker train" phenomena. I don't know about the rest of the girls here but frankly if I worked with oodles I'd be pissed at you for taking even more customers out of the club and out of dancers money. We all complain about extras girls and basically what she wants to give in the end is extras correct? I don't understand why all the girls here will be united against extras (because they ruin girls money) in one thread, and for them (just in different wording) in another. I don't get this site sometimes!

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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    Quote Originally Posted by NatalieFRPhilly View Post
    I don't know why we are getting crap for this supposed "dirty hooker train" phenomena. I don't know about the rest of the girls here but frankly if I worked with oodles I'd be pissed at you for taking even more customers out of the club and out of dancers money. We all complain about extras girls and basically what she wants to give in the end is extras correct? I don't understand why all the girls here will be united against extras (because they ruin girls money) in one thread, and for them (just in different wording) in another. I don't get this site sometimes!
    I'm against extras in the club. Nothing we do as dancers will satisfy a guy who wants to pay for sex. Strippers are like appetizers, prostitutes are like entrees. Some guys could nosh on appetizers all night and be perfectly happy, but some guys crave entrees and come out unsatisfied. Some guys want fairly anonymous, no strings attached sex, and are willing to pay well to get it. There will always be prostitutes. There have always been prostitutes. We can't control that. But a good escort keeps her business out of the club, and I don't think her trade will affect the consistent money to be made from appetizer-noshers, our loyal and polite customers. Keep those guys happy. Some guys don't want sex, and they're the ones we make money from. I promise the guys who demand extras will eventually "graduate" to frequenting massage parlors and escorts if they don't get extras ITC.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    My friend left dancing for awhile, and she had a plan. She had a customer who she went on a dinner/movie date with for $300 weekly. And she would meet other regulars a few times a week for drinks, etc to get some money. Not sure if she slept with them, but I think hooking was a rarity for her.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    Well.....

    Quote Originally Posted by oodlesofnoodles View Post
    I worded it the way that I did because I don't want to rush it. If they're happy with dancing and cuddling, then I'm definitely happy with that. But these two in particular, if after some time they wanted to do more, and they wanted to help me out more, I think that I could, and at least could consider it. With them. (And to be honest, I've had sex with guys I liked a lot less, who had nothing to contribute to my life beside headache and heartache, so it would probably be a step up for me. lol)

    Not all guys are the same. Don't give up on finding a relationship where love and affection is exchanged freely simply because you've had a few bad experiences, and the only guys you feel are currently treating you nicely are willing to pay for your affection. The guys who pay will eventually tire of you, or split when their wives find out - most men who frequent escorts ARE married. They're probably perfectly happy with their wives EMOTIONALLY but are craving sexual variety. Make them pay by the hour. Don't give them freebies because they act like they care about you. They don't. There's a saying that goes "I didn't pay the hooker for sex, I paid her to leave afterwards" Get it?

    So Viola's suggestion, about being an escort... is maybe much closer to what I was thinking of. Except I don't want to do it with lots of dudes, just a few that I like.. That's probably very naive of me, lol. But I already operate this way at work. I've gotten very selective about who I'll sit down with and that means that I get customers who I enjoy more.

    If you're smart, pretty, and a good businesswoman, you don't have to accept every client who asks. You can pick and choose. You can have your own screening process. Make them get tested for STDs. Make them pay up front. Charge as much as you want. If they can't pay - sorry! No loving. Speak to them on the phone before agreeing to a "date", and don't go if they're not polite. Make them go out for coffee with you first.

    I know I have gone to customer's houses to do private shows before and it was exactly like doing dances in the club. So I know there are guys that do just want to have a pretty girl come over and dance for them or sit and chat, or go out to dinner.

    There definitely is a market for this. But if they want more, charge accordingly!

    I guess what my dilemma is right now... is since these guys are used to come see me at the club, what they are paying for is like... the chase, right? Because I never give it up. But then eventually if I did give it up, maybe they wouldn't have any interest in me any more, and I am interested in maintaining this longer-term relationship.

    Talk to them about it. Ask them if they want more. Make it clear they have to pay to get it.

    So then I think, maybe it's a bad idea to change things. I'm not getting any pressure from them to change things. I'm not totally sure I want to change things. But then again, I do get so tired of having to meet new guys over and over. I like to put my energy on people I already know.


    Like I said, you can pick and choose if you want.

    Anyhow I'm going out for coffee with one of the guys, and the other probably to dinner. Just to see if I even feel comfortable meeting them otc, cause who knows, I may not. I've gone out to coffee or dinner before and this usually has a beneficial result, so I'm not too worried about that.

    also: if I did end up doing anything with these guys, I would keep them away from the club, and if I did go back to dancing, I wouldn't do it that way again. Its just that I happen to like these two guys and... I already know them.


    Do whatever you want. The people who judge you and hate on you don't matter for anything. You only have to answer to yourself.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    Quote Originally Posted by ViolaStrings View Post
    I'm against extras in the club. Nothing we do as dancers will satisfy a guy who wants to pay for sex. Strippers are like appetizers, prostitutes are like entrees. Some guys could nosh on appetizers all night and be perfectly happy, but some guys crave entrees and come out unsatisfied. Some guys want fairly anonymous, no strings attached sex, and are willing to pay well to get it. There will always be prostitutes. There have always been prostitutes. We can't control that. But a good escort keeps her business out of the club, and I don't think her trade will affect the consistent money to be made from appetizer-noshers, our loyal and polite customers. Keep those guys happy. Some guys don't want sex, and they're the ones we make money from. I promise the guys who demand extras will eventually "graduate" to frequenting massage parlors and escorts if they don't get extras ITC.
    Exactly this. If a guy wants sex, and he comes to the club, unless you are planning on giving him sex, you wont make money off of him anyway. Not saying that's what these two customers of her want. But if you're going to get upset about a girl giving a guy extras OUTSIDE the club, I think it's a waste of time.

    Honestly...if all the extra's girls took all the customers who wanted sex away to have sex with them, and left me the guys who don't beg/ask/whine/barder/harrass/bribe/insult and downright assume sex is part of the menu, well, I'd be one happy lil stripper!

    Sure, if I see "Sparkle" giving a handjob in the VIP and my custy sees it and asks for the same, yep I'm pissed. Heads will roll....but if they're not in the club for me to see it, what do I care?

    And again, this is not saying that sex is what the OP is providing...I guess I got a WEE bit off topic there.




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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    Quote Originally Posted by ExoticEngineer View Post
    Exactly this. If a guy wants sex, and he comes to the club, unless you are planning on giving him sex, you wont make money off of him anyway. Not saying that's what these two customers of her want. But if you're going to get upset about a girl giving a guy extras OUTSIDE the club, I think it's a waste of time.

    Honestly...if all the extra's girls took all the customers who wanted sex away to have sex with them, and left me the guys who don't beg/ask/whine/barder/harrass/bribe/insult and downright assume sex is part of the menu, well, I'd be one happy lil stripper!

    Sure, if I see "Sparkle" giving a handjob in the VIP and my custy sees it and asks for the same, yep I'm pissed. Heads will roll....but if they're not in the club for me to see it, what do I care?

    And again, this is not saying that sex is what the OP is providing...I guess I got a WEE bit off topic there.
    Yep.

    Well, she admits she'd probably have sex with them if they wanted to compensate accordingly. I think it's what she wants, but feels like she needs someone's permission or approval to do it.

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    Featured Member NatalieFRPhilly's Avatar
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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    Quote Originally Posted by ViolaStrings View Post
    I'm against extras in the club. Nothing we do as dancers will satisfy a guy who wants to pay for sex. Strippers are like appetizers, prostitutes are like entrees. Some guys could nosh on appetizers all night and be perfectly happy, but some guys crave entrees and come out unsatisfied. Some guys want fairly anonymous, no strings attached sex, and are willing to pay well to get it. There will always be prostitutes. There have always been prostitutes. We can't control that. But a good escort keeps her business out of the club, and I don't think her trade will affect the consistent money to be made from appetizer-noshers, our loyal and polite customers. Keep those guys happy. Some guys don't want sex, and they're the ones we make money from. I promise the guys who demand extras will eventually "graduate" to frequenting massage parlors and escorts if they don't get extras ITC.
    I think it's okay for prostitutes to do whatever the heck they want to do when they are not in the club. But she is taking away from the club. I get your point Exotic Engineer how you don't want them in your club anyways, but they probably already spend in there w/o getting sex, but now they'll get it so why would they go back. I dunno, this just pisses me off, just like it'd piss me off if prostitutes from the street just came in as customers and talked to the guys and talked them back to their hotel rooms. This seems like just the same thing to me. I think it'd be a whole different story if she was just a regular whatever she wanted to be, but the fact that she's gonna be taking all those regulars from the club annoys me.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    Quote Originally Posted by ViolaStrings View Post
    I'm against extras in the club. Nothing we do as dancers will satisfy a guy who wants to pay for sex. Strippers are like appetizers, prostitutes are like entrees. Some guys could nosh on appetizers all night and be perfectly happy, but some guys crave entrees and come out unsatisfied. Some guys want fairly anonymous, no strings attached sex, and are willing to pay well to get it. There will always be prostitutes. There have always been prostitutes. We can't control that. But a good escort keeps her business out of the club, and I don't think her trade will affect the consistent money to be made from appetizer-noshers, our loyal and polite customers. Keep those guys happy. Some guys don't want sex, and they're the ones we make money from. I promise the guys who demand extras will eventually "graduate" to frequenting massage parlors and escorts if they don't get extras ITC.
    thanks good point

    Quote Originally Posted by NatalieFRPhilly View Post
    I think it's okay for prostitutes to do whatever the heck they want to do when they are not in the club. But she is taking away from the club. I get your point Exotic Engineer how you don't want them in your club anyways, but they probably already spend in there w/o getting sex, but now they'll get it so why would they go back. I dunno, this just pisses me off, just like it'd piss me off if prostitutes from the street just came in as customers and talked to the guys and talked them back to their hotel rooms. This seems like just the same thing to me. I think it'd be a whole different story if she was just a regular whatever she wanted to be, but the fact that she's gonna be taking all those regulars from the club annoys me.

    in her post she said they are HER customers only. they dont dance with anyone else. i dont consider that taking away from the club

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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    Quote Originally Posted by velvet View Post
    in her post she said they are HER customers only. they dont dance with anyone else. i dont consider that taking away from the club
    EXACTLY

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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    i thought she was just planning on giving high contact dances at her home.

    well to the OP, you can make loads of money by escorting/hooking. good luck.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    All regulars have a use-by date and that will happen whether you do it ITC or OTC. I would be concerned as someone mentioned above that you might not be well compensated enough for the amount of time that you are spending with them. The more they feel they are on closer friendship terms with you - dinner etc the less they might feel that they have to pay you for your time.

    Set clear boundaries with them and be careful. There is a risk of doing it OTC because you don't have security to protect you. You never know what a person is really like just by knowing them ITC.
    Quote Originally Posted by Corgan View Post
    when regulars turn cheap, it's time to kill em off.
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    You're still a vagina.
    There are many stereotypes about the industry that I work in. Sometimes they can be true but human beings are very diverse creatures and cannot be pigeon-holed into one category.

    Some of the most effortlessly beautiful, kind, intelligent, successful, motivated, driven and ridiculously hilarious women that I have ever met have been dancers. I've met the best friends that I've ever had in this industry.

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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    Quote Originally Posted by NatalieFRPhilly View Post
    I don't know why we are getting crap for this supposed "dirty hooker train" phenomena. I don't know about the rest of the girls here but frankly if I worked with oodles I'd be pissed at you for taking even more customers out of the club and out of dancers money. We all complain about extras girls and basically what she wants to give in the end is extras correct? I don't understand why all the girls here will be united against extras (because they ruin girls money) in one thread, and for them (just in different wording) in another. I don't get this site sometimes!

    SO TRUE!

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    Default Re: quitting dancing...and taking some regulars with me? crazy? stupid?

    Quote Originally Posted by NatalieFRPhilly View Post
    I don't know why we are getting crap for this supposed "dirty hooker train" phenomena. I don't know about the rest of the girls here but frankly if I worked with oodles I'd be pissed at you for taking even more customers out of the club and out of dancers money. We all complain about extras girls and basically what she wants to give in the end is extras correct? I don't understand why all the girls here will be united against extras (because they ruin girls money) in one thread, and for them (just in different wording) in another. I don't get this site sometimes!
    IF they are her dedicated regulars and no one else's who does it hurt? The bar maybe looses cover and a few bucks each visit in drinks from them, but that is it.

    I am opposed to extras girls IN THE CLUB. I could care less if at 3:15am to wanna go in the bak alley and charge guys $.18 to snort coke off your twat while being gang banged by a group of midget clowns.

    That doesn't effect my job IN THE CLUB.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    Quote Originally Posted by ExoticEngineer View Post
    Feel like a damn salt lick at the goats petting zoo!
    <08SM>

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