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Thread: Drunk Hall of Shame

  1. #26
    Veteran Member ellebelle's Avatar
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    Default Re: Drunk Hall of Shame

    Oh God, where do I begin :S I've lost count of the number of times I've made an ass of myself drinking.

    One particularily gross example happened a while ago. One of my friends used to always jump on my back for a piggyback when she was especially hyper. Except one time she did it when I was really drunk and as soon as she wrapped her legs around my stomach I projectile vommited onto the floor, and then under her weight I fell to the ground and face-planted into my own vomit, her not far behind.
    The world's most uncoordinated stripper

  2. #27
    Veteran Member Casey4Now's Avatar
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    Default Re: Drunk Hall of Shame

    The one I remember the most was a few years ago..Me and a friend were at a party where we managed to polish off a fifth of Absolute, appearantly we felt that was not going to be enough so we get some guy to give us a ride to the store for more. When we get back I get out of the car with the fifth tucked under my arm and hands in my pockets, well it had been snowing and was very icy.

    The next thing I know the curb is about two inches from my face and my hands are still in my pockets. I slipped on the ice and didn't relieze it until too late. I ended up with two black eyes my lips were so swollen they were even with my nose for about a week. I have NOT drank liquor since. btw the fifth of absolute was NOT hurt in this accident.

    Oh yeah Alaska your Hyatt post reminded me of another. When I worked there we snuck up to a Celebs room and we were parting with them, well I did too many beer bongs and ended up throwing up everywhere. The sad part was my aunt was manager of housekeeping and had to clean it up. She bitched about it, but to this day I never told her it was me

  3. #28
    God/dess MrChristopher's Avatar
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    Default Re: Drunk Hall of Shame

    I went to a show with a friend in Philly. Terminal Sect, I think it was. Anyway, several Jack and Cokes were enjoyed there. Afterwards, we went up the street to Delilah's. The bartenders thought it was amusing that I was smashed, so they kept giving me shots of Jack, which I stupidly drank. PhillyDJ was working that night, and I ended up laying on the floor of the DJ booth, half way under the counter, using my jacket for a pillow. Apparently while I was semi-conscious a guy came up to ask who he should talk to about a possible DJ job. Philly DJ moved to the side, pointed at me, and said "That guy!". Strangely, we never heard from the guy. I think we stayed til the end of the night. My friend and I walk outside, he takes my keys out of my pocket like a good pal. I wanted to get something out of my car, and instead ended on my hands and knees in the Delilah's parking lot puking my face off. My friend then called MrsC and held the phone out so she could hear my retching and cursing, and told her I was going to be crashing at his house for the evening. We got back to his place, and I went downstairs to puke some more. After that, I was almost too exhausted to climb back upstairs, so I went into what I thought was the empty bedroom next to the bathroom and crawled into bed. Suddenly I hear a guy go "Um..dude. You're in my bed." It seems they had a new roomie which I didn't know about. I mumbled something and got up, putting on one of the guys red t-shirts, and stealing his sheet which was also red. I got back upstairs and my friend looked at me and asked where the shirt and sheet had come from, I didn't know. He dubbed me "The Crimson Intruder" that night. I do still drink, but I tend to avoid Jack. For awhile afterwards I would have to turn my head when I was bartending if I poured Jack, as even the smell made me queasy. I'm pretty sure I told this story on here once before, but it fits in this thread.
    waffles are just pancakes with little squares on them.

  4. #29
    God/dess VegasPrincess's Avatar
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    Default Re: Drunk Hall of Shame

    When I was 18 I started dating the drummer from a pretty well known band. I was going to move in with him, and was taking the train down from Milwaukee to Chicago to meet him, then we were supposed to fly to New York.

    I chickened out, and got off the train at some random stop. Went to this bar resturaunt to buy smokes, tell the bartender my story. He's all, "I feel bad for you let me buy you a drink." I wasn't going to pass that up, and I got a huge gin martini. Was so drunk that I couldn't read the numbers on the trains coming and going or figure out how to buy a ticket and get on one. My cell phone wouldn't work, so I called a friend from the pay phone but I didn't know where I was. I walked up to a bunch of people and it took forever to find somebody who would tell me because I was all wasted, and what city am I in apparently isn't a normal question.
    Sexy Jasmine after getting fucked over at work:

    God loves strippers and when guys do things like that its an automatic ticket to HELL!


    Quote Originally Posted by anomar View Post
    Perhaps you stopped spending money on her. Strippers need money to operate. They are like coin operated juke-boxes of love.

  5. #30
    Veteran Member Danielle_'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Drunk Hall of Shame

    My really drunk stories usually go something like this. Down a bunch of drinks to get hammered, but never stop when I should. Hit on or dance w/ a bunch of guys, but only the hot ones, sometimes kiss a girlfriend of mine who's basically always up for anyone kissing her, make out w/ some guy (even if I know I shouldn't), be loud & yell at people, blackout (losing hours of the story), then puke (sometimes I this happens during my blackout), & wake up the next day feeling okay, but sometimes embarrassed. Oh, I should also add that if I'm upset I call my mom & drunkenly cry to her, which is very embarrassing later.


    Quote Originally Posted by Darcy Foxx View Post
    ummm well on halloween night this year my friend and i were so drunk that we went to the park and thought we took a picture of a ghost, so we were running home almost in tears freaking out that we'd brought a ghost home with us, then we drunkenly posted bulletins all about it on myspace and we were probably more scared than we'd ever been in our entire lives.... until a myspace friend kindly pointed out that it wasn't a ghost, it was the camera strap.

    my friends and i get drunk and crazy all the time. i do so much stupid shit when i'm drunk.
    That's funny. It reminds me of a time from this past summer when I was dancing w/ some friends at a bar & was so drunk, I said "that looks really scary" & took a picture. The next day looking through my pics I saw one of a tarp hanging from the wall. I think I had thought it was scary looking due to it vaguely resembling the killer from I Know What You Did Last Summer.


    Quote Originally Posted by SundayMorning View Post
    Me neither. The worst I ever did was throw up outside my friend's car, get a massage from him and reciprocate with a blowjob, then tell The Hubby about it while the friend was right there. (We were open then and we're open now!)

    In retrospect, why in the world did he want a blowjob from me after I had thrown up? Grossssss.
    Well this guy I know & I both threw up repeatedly but still made attempts to have sex w/ each other once, so it doesn't surprise me much.

    Forgetting things we shouldn't remember is why god invented amnesia and Tequila. - Samantha Who

  6. #31
    cameron_keys
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    Default Re: Drunk Hall of Shame

    Quote Originally Posted by Taylorlila View Post
    I hope you guys aren't saying that because I said I parked my car at a gas station . I literally drove it about 500 ft. because I couldn't leave it where it was. And apparantly couldn't leave it where I left it becase it got towed...oops.
    Look at who was quoted when that original comment was made...they arent talking about you sweetie.


    Ok...me....about 5 years ago me and 2 friends are working in Key West. We were staying at the Hampton Inn(which isnt there anymore). We went out on our night off...got a little(ok a lot)tipsy and invited some boys we knew back to the hotel. We all pile in a cab and go. This hotel has a 24 hr pool and hot tub. In Key West. Where all there is to do at night is drink and they have a festival every year devoted to debauchery and topless women. Uh huh.You'd think the'd come to terms with the fact that there WILL be naked people in the hot tub at SOME point in time.
    We go to the hot tub...dot bother wearing anything but panties and a towel because 1)we're drunk 2)we know these guys so we know we are safe and 3) WE ARE IN KEY WEST....it is 4am and theres nobody else at the pool area.

    Security guard is NOT happy. Tells us to put our tops on. We tell him we cant because we dont have any. We invite him to join us(lol....he was about 60 and I believe gay). He is REALLY not happy. Tells us that other people and children will see us. We say...WHO?? Theres nobody else here and there wont be for HOURS..esp children.

    He calls the cops.

    We go back to our room giggling.

    Cops show up...come to the room with security man. They say "whats the problem". Security man says "the girls had no tops on" Cops say "Seriously...whats the problem??" Security man gets pissed he isnt being taken seriously(because nippular exposure is a SERIOUS crime in his eyes I guess) and says he wants us kicked out of the hotel.

    Now my friend is PISSED and starts mouthing off to security man,cops, whoever...that she may only be 5 feet tall, but she can beat any of their asses and she grew up with law enforcement and knows the "deal"..blah blah...So now I have to push her back and take over as the voice of reason.

    I make a deal that we can stay til checkout if she goes to stay with one of the guys(who was her KW piece of ass and she had stayed at his place many times before so I knew it was ok with them both). So she goes to his place, we crash for a cpl hours, wake up checkout, pick her up and hung over like you wouldnt believe drive the 4 hours home. Of course...we were planning to leave that day anyway so other then the picking her up part..nothing else was differant.

    But we have always been proud that we technically got kicked out of a hotel in Key West for being topless.

  7. #32
    Featured Member red red red's Avatar
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    Default Re: Drunk Hall of Shame

    At the first club I worked at, I once drunkenly decided that this little cubbyhole back in the DJ booth would be a good place to hide out. I started eyeing it up while talking to the DJ and finally was just like, "excuse me," and crawled in there with my knees up against my chest. I was very pleased with myself for discovering this, like no one could see me because I couldn't see them. I think the DJ also liked the idea of having a booth stowaway and kept lowering me more drinks down into the cubbyhole. At some point I went into the dressing room and put my T-shirt on over my dance outfit and crawled back into the cubbyhole and fell asleep for awhile.

    That's me, the consummate professional.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  8. #33
    Kaylinn
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    Default Re: Drunk Hall of Shame

    I was gonna post my funny drunk stories...but ya know, I just can't remember any

  9. #34
    Senior Member SuburbanSocialite's Avatar
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    Default Re: Drunk Hall of Shame

    I only have two, so far, decent drunk stories:

    -The first time was about 2 years ago, where I hadn't eaten anything in hours, had a "martini" made with Everclear and more than a few cups of a drink called Decatorade. I got wasted, went to a house party, did my nasty dancer routine on some random guys, puked on the sidewalk, and was taken home. My friends put me to bed and I passed out. Hours later I wake up, still in my own bed, but I was drunk and delirious, so I think I'm somewhere else. I get myself locked out, with no shoes, no keys, no phone, and no bra. My roomie lets me back in and I pass out again in a bed that for some mysterious reason is soaking wet at the top. The next day, I go to my neighbor's, where I was drinking to begin with, and get my stuff and they tell me that I gave a guy a lapdance and I won a beer funnel contest. Wonderful.

    -The last time was last spring and it started out the same way. No food, 2 Ameretto Sours, 3 or 4 Sex on the Beaches, and 2 Jager Bombs. I got trashed, threw up on the street outside of the club, and twice during the ride home. I wake up at 8:00 the next morning butt naked (thankfully, in my own bed), on top of the covers with my cellphone vibrating under my left ass cheek, still drunk.

    Boyfriend at the time had been frantically calling me all night (I had said before I left that I would call him when I got back) and naturally since my phone was on vibrate, I couldn't hear it. Turns out, I puked outside of my apartment, got inside, then barfed all over my clothes. There was even puke down my top and inside my bra (!). To make matters worse, I threw up again somewhere between my bed and the wall and tried to hide it from myself by throwing my conforter over it. So I had to wash my clothes and my new comforter. Also, I had to go grocery shopping and walking through a store full of food when you're sick and hung-over is not fun. I was running for the sliding doors by the time I was done, where I proceeded to throw up one more time outside of the Piggly Wiggly. Fabulous.

  10. #35
    Veteran Member Danielle_'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Drunk Hall of Shame

    This is just a small part of the story. But once at our fav bar, myself & most of my friends got very drunk. I don't remember this but was told that I called one of them & said "I can't get out" then hung up. She was freaking out a little & told another friend of ours & the bartender overheard. She said that she'd locked the door to the outside. So apparently, I was "stuck" in the small hall between the 2 doors.

    Forgetting things we shouldn't remember is why god invented amnesia and Tequila. - Samantha Who

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