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Thread: another relationship problem (plese advise)

  1. #1
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    Default another relationship problem (plese advise)

    hey guys
    i made a post a few weeks ago regarding me and my gf..
    i kind of broke up with her out of anger, and ive been trying to get back with her ever since..

    anyways lets fast forward to now..

    i got fired from my job 2 weeks ago because i havent been focusing on work (because all my focus and attention was on the GF and getting the relationship to work)

    2 weeks ago, i was also involved in a car accident, where i spun my car 6 times on the highway, hit the wall twice, and managed not to hit anyone else, and i wasnt hurt, and my car is already fixed.
    i text her saying i got into an accident , and she TEXTED me back (not called), saying "are you ok"...
    she then called me the following morning. ERGH

    during that time, she was diagnosed with a life long disease that requires her to take a bunch of pills everyday... after thinking about the consequences of all this, i STILL wanted to be with her..

    anyway, we made plans to go to my friends birthday party, and when we got there, there was a problem, and she couldnt get in...
    long story short, we ended up just chilling at her place, watching tv and spooning..

    then some shit went down with her step sister, she got drunk, and got into a fight with her ex bf and got hit in the head with a bottle..
    her parents, herself, and i went to see her, and i ended up in the middle of a fight between her dad and some drunk punk..

    anyways, long story short i helped them, and the pops thanked me, and everything was ok ..

    that night, before i left, SHE kissed me on the lips instead of on the cheek like she did before...
    the FOLLOWING DAY, i came over just to chill, and she wouldnt kiss me on my lips because "i wanted it"...
    then i brought up our status, and she told me not to push her, and to let things take their course.. ERGH


    fast forward two days later (tuesday night), i go to see her, and i tell her
    "listen, all this shit happened, i lost my job, and now i have to focus on myself, and my future. i am going to start my own business, and i want to make money so i can have a family in the next few years, and a house and all that.... i want you to be in my future"...

    she said that i kept on pushing it bla bla bla ..

    now keep in mind , its been almost 4 weeks since we "broke up"
    BUT at the same time, she has told me she hasnt been fucking around, and that same morning, she called me , and thought she heard a woman in my apt... and there was absolutely no one there..

    so i get really confused and am depressed...
    SHE calls me the following day inviting me to get sushi with her.. we go, have a convo, and then she invites me to her place to watch tv... we watch tv, we're spooning, she's resting her head on my chest, and i have my hand on her ass, then i sneak my hand into her panties... and after a few minutes (didnt get to her vagina), she takes my hand away.. ok no problem...
    we chill for a few more minutes, and then SHE kisses me back on the lips..

    thursday comes.. she calls me kuz i offered to pick her up in the morning to go to school but she never confirmed it , so i didnt get her... we spoke for a few minutes... and i told her i was really sick that day... she recomends some anti-biotics and we dont speak for about 9 hours...


    i text her that night simply saying "hey, just thinking about you"
    she replies with "im covered in syrup"... (she is into baking, and was spending time with her sister)

    i really feel like im being treated like gold one day, and like shit the next...
    so i decided not to contact her yesterday, and to ignore her calls if she calls , yesterday, today, and tomorrow..

    to let her know that she cant have me only when she wants..

    so far she hasnt contacted me yesterday, she hasnt contacted me so far today, and i cant predict the future..


    i wanted your ladies advice as to wtf is going on in this girls head ?

    if she didnt want to be with me, why is she showing me affection one day, and getting jealous because she THINKS she hears a woman in my house, and she even told me if she saw me with another woman, it would hurt her...


    what do i do to resolve this..
    i want to be with her, i hoenstly feel she's my soul mate, but i dont want to be taken for granted....

    ladies, HELP !!

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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    we can't tell you what is going on in her head unfortunately.
    What disease was she diagnosed with?
    Maybe instead of bringing up the question of status just let things happen. If you don't say that she wont feel so much pressure.

    How long were you guys together?




  3. #3
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    I'm going to be really blunt here: She doesn't want to be with you. Maybe (very remotely maybe) she wants to be friends, but that's it. You keep trying to force something that just isn't there. Not only that, I recall someone in the other thread saying it sounded like she doesn't want you but doesn't want anyone else to have you either. It still sounds like that. She's stringing you along. It sounds like she might be keeping you around as an "option" in case nothing else works out. Whatever the case may be, it's game playing and it sucks. Get out now.

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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    chrones disease
    we were not together for a long time, but we clicked IMMEDIATELY.. and everything moved fast

    we were barely officially together for 2 months, BUT we were messing aroudn and seeing eachotehr since august..
    i met her last february, and the second i saw her, i KNEW she was going to be mine ... (she has 2 different colored eyes, and im attracted to things like that)

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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    this is way too much drama for a 2 month long relationship.

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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    i honestly dont believe there is anyone else in the picture because of a few reasons
    #1 she is EXTREMELY intimidating, and most guys are afraid to make a move
    #2 she is a very "wierd" person, and is quick to catch an atitude
    #3 she has told me that she hasnt been fucking anyone else

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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    do you guys think im doing the rigth thing by not contacting her this weekend ?
    maybe it will make her realise she cant keep on doing this shit... and to make her up and tell me once and for all if she wants to be together or not ?

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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    i dont want to sound cocky or anything like that
    but i have NEVER had this happen to me before...
    every woman ive been with has always always always been "into me' more than ive been into them

    when we FIRST started dating (first few weeks), that was the case..

    i cant get myself to go out with my friends... everyone is telling me to forget about her, but something is telling me to keep on pushing.. and its KILLING me inside.. ive been going through this for nearly 4 weeks, and i fucking lost a great job, and got into a horrible accident, and im still focused on her..

    even last night, i met up with a fuck buddy (because she has said it to me over and over tht i broke up with her, and she's not my gf, and im not her bf) and i couldnt pull the trigger... i burned that bridge last night..

  9. #9
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    Quote Originally Posted by SteveK View Post
    i honestly dont believe there is anyone else in the picture because of a few reasons
    #1 she is EXTREMELY intimidating, and most guys are afraid to make a move
    #2 she is a very "wierd" person, and is quick to catch an atitude
    #3 she has told me that she hasnt been fucking anyone else
    Nobody said there's someone else. Just because she'd keeping you as an option doesn't mean there's someone else.

    Man, why are you going to come here and ask for advice and opinions if all you're gonna do is give us reasons why we're wrong? Dude, she doesn't want you, move on!!

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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    Quote Originally Posted by Glamazon View Post
    Nobody said there's someone else. Just because she'd keeping you as an option doesn't mean there's someone else.

    Man, why are you going to come here and ask for advice and opinions if all you're gonna do is give us reasons why we're wrong? Dude, she doesn't want you, move on!!
    because he wants to hear what he wants to hear

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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    Quote Originally Posted by britt244 View Post
    this is way too much drama for a 2 month long relationship.
    This is too much drama for a 2 YEAR relationship.

    Dude.

    She doesn't want you. She doesn't want anyone else to have you. But she still does not want to be with you. Got it?


    No?
    Ok. Dogs like to piss on trees. Some dogs pee just a little on lots of trees to mark their territory. Do they need all these trees to pee on? No, but they don't want anyone else using their trees.

    Stop being pissed on.



    Because there ain't no tits on the radio

  12. #12
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    Quote Originally Posted by SteveK View Post
    i dont want to sound cocky or anything like that
    but i have NEVER had this happen to me before...
    every woman ive been with has always always always been "into me' more than ive been into them

    when we FIRST started dating (first few weeks), that was the case..
    Therein lies the problem. You've never been rejected before. It hurts, but you'll get over it as soon as you realize that the relationship is over and she doesn't want to be with you.

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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    Quote Originally Posted by hardkandee View Post
    Ok. Dogs like to piss on trees. Some dogs pee just a little on lots of trees to mark their territory. Do they need all these trees to pee on? No, but they don't want anyone else using their trees.

    Stop being pissed on.
    Bwahahaha, this is totally going in my siggy!
    I believe you Dottie and you have my support

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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    so do i just completely forget about her ?
    im NOT interested in being friends (only) with her..

  15. #15
    BrunetteGoddess
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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    Quote Originally Posted by SteveK View Post
    do you guys think im doing the rigth thing by not contacting her this weekend ?
    maybe it will make her realise she cant keep on doing this shit... and to make her up and tell me once and for all if she wants to be together or not ?
    YES. This girl can't have her cake and eat it too. Either she wants you or she doesn't. If she doesn't contact you first this time, you've been given your answer.

  16. #16
    BrunetteGoddess
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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    Quote Originally Posted by SteveK View Post
    i dont want to sound cocky or anything like that
    but i have NEVER had this happen to me before...
    every woman ive been with has always always always been "into me' more than ive been into them

    when we FIRST started dating (first few weeks), that was the case..

    i cant get myself to go out with my friends... everyone is telling me to forget about her, but something is telling me to keep on pushing.. and its KILLING me inside.. ive been going through this for nearly 4 weeks, and i fucking lost a great job, and got into a horrible accident, and im still focused on her..

    even last night, i met up with a fuck buddy (because she has said it to me over and over tht i broke up with her, and she's not my gf, and im not her bf) and i couldnt pull the trigger... i burned that bridge last night..
    Maybe that's why you can't seem to let this go quietly, because she's a challenge.

    Challenges do not equal good relationship. Just forget about her. Period. End of story.

  17. #17
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    Quote Originally Posted by SteveK View Post
    so do i just completely forget about her ?
    im NOT interested in being friends (only) with her..
    No, keep pursuing her with no success, then come here in another month and ask for advice again.

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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    ladies youre the best...

    thanks for the advice
    i actually feel better about myself...

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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    Quote Originally Posted by SteveK View Post
    so do i just completely forget about her ?
    im NOT interested in being friends (only) with her..
    I think this a red flag that you need to look at.
    Consider this idea: Most people who really want to be with somebody will really go the distance and try to prove themselves worthy. Even if it means being friends for a while. If you are not willing to be friends with her you need to contemplate if you really do care about her as much as you think you do.
    She still hangs out with you. So either she wants to be just friends or she wants to see you but there is something thats wrong, something you are not quite fulfilling.
    As some of the other ladies have mentioned is rather a lot of drama for a short relationship. But we truly cannot see what you see and what she sees nor can we completely understand what is going on here.
    If she is worth it to you then you need to go the extra mile, even if its not the way you like at first
    It may be far more beneficial for you to be friend with her for a while. you are still getting to know her i presume. get to know her better without the stress of a relationship and it will really help you get to know her better.
    i am sure if you do this she will respect you more if she is a great person like you say.
    hope this helps




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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    ok
    thats completely understandable
    BUT
    its already been 4 weeks
    and #2, i might sound like a jerk saying this, i want to have sex.
    when im with her, i dont think about just being her friend, and talking about what she learned in school, i dont mind that stuff, but when i take her home, and she gives me a kiss on my cheek, it kills me
    because i want to fuck...
    i want to be her friend AND lover..

  21. #21
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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    How old are you?



    Because there ain't no tits on the radio

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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    Quote Originally Posted by SteveK View Post
    ok
    thats completely understandable
    BUT
    its already been 4 weeks
    and #2, i might sound like a jerk saying this, i want to have sex.
    when im with her, i dont think about just being her friend, and talking about what she learned in school, i dont mind that stuff, but when i take her home, and she gives me a kiss on my cheek, it kills me
    because i want to fuck...
    i want to be her friend AND lover..
    you might wanna keep it in your pants, fortunately hands fit into pants.. your hands...

    this is why God created masturbation... or was that Adam?




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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    im 24.......

  24. #24
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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    .............. ?




  25. #25
    BrunetteGoddess
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    Default Re: another relationship problem (plese advise)

    ^^ HK asked him his age.

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