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Thread: Sex toy ban, has this been discussed?

  1. #1
    High_Heel_Lover
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    Default Sex toy ban, has this been discussed?

    In Alabama, you can sell guns on any street corner but you can't sell sex toys.
    That's right. Alabama is a vibrator-free state!
    Well, technically you can go across state lines and buy sex toys in Georgia and Tennessee and carry them home. But the Alabama Legislature, in its infinite wisdom and in the spirit of protecting citizens from moral turpitude, a while back banned the sale of sex toys (or "marital aids" as some lawmakers coyly call them).
    Today, the U.S. Supreme Court has shown a gleam of interest in this controversial state law, which has been challenged in Alabama courts by adult toy retailer Sherri Williams. She has been fighting the law for nearly 10 years.
    Williams has been in district court three times on this issue and has won twice. But both times her victories were struck down by the U.S. 11th Circuit Court of Appeals. She filed a petition to the Supremes and has hired well-known First Amendment rights attorney Paul Cambria. Also joining in the appeal petition with Williams are the Free Speech Coalition and the First Amendment Lawyers Association.
    (At the very least, this case seems to be a restraint-of-trade case as much as anything else, since the devices are sold in all the neighboring states. You'd think she would win on that, alone.)
    Anyway, the Supremes have informed the state of Alabama that it must file an answering brief with the High Court, which is an indication that the case might be taken up in the next session. If so, I would like to be a fly on the wall when oral arguments are heard.
    SCALLIA: You say that the sale of the Twizzler-Twister should be banned?
    ALABAMA GUY: Yes,Your Honor.
    ALITO: And the Buzzer-Master?
    ALABAMA GUY: Yes, that too.
    THOMAS: What about the coke can with the fake pubic hair?
    ALABAMA GUY: That one doesn't vibrate, so that one's okay.
    THOMAS: Whew! Thank goodness.
    But seriously folks, I am hoping that y'all have stopped snickering at the Victorian attitudes of our fine Alabama lawmakers because I want to talk for a minute about sexual attitudes in the Land O' Cotton.
    There is, and always has been, a strong strain of paternalism among lawmakers down here. And that paternalistic attitude makes them believe that they are the keepers of the Moral Keys. Us wee folk need protecting from sexual pleasures derived from plastic thingies made in China.
    The same lawmakers also have protected Alabamians from the glittering vice dens called casinos, the dangerous Mega-Ball lotteries and betting parlors. All for our own good.
    They do, however, let us have SOME fun. We have fireworks stores at every interstate exit. We can buy all manner of guns easily and openly as long as we are of legal age. And we can shoot off the aforementioned fireworks and guns pretty much wherever and whenever we want.
    In other words we are free to blow ourselves up at will.
    We just can't blow up a dolly with big red lips and openings in her lifelike vinyl self.

  2. #2
    Veteran Member LexxusLovely's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex toy ban, has this been discussed?

    Thank god that coke can w/ the fake pubes doesn't vibrate. Who knows what kind of shennanigens people could be getting into because of vibrating motors!
    Quote Originally Posted by StrawberrySwitchblade View Post
    As I was walking by the dressing room to the little girl's room, I heard this gem:

    Stripper: "And that wasn't the first time I lost my panties while bull-riding."



  3. #3
    God/dess SundayMorning's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex toy ban, has this been discussed?

    Isn't Oklahoma the same way? Or just can't sell porn? There's something weird and backwards about Oklahoma's sex laws, but by the time I was old enough to buy stuff I was living in TX so I forget.


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    God/dess
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    Default Re: Sex toy ban, has this been discussed?

    Here in Texas, vibrators are sold as 'novelties'. Any shop selling these always has signs up saying they are for novelty and not for actual use. Whatev..

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    God/dess xdamage's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex toy ban, has this been discussed?

    HAHAHA - can anything be more pathetic then ego's afraid of vibrators. LOL

  6. #6
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Sex toy ban, has this been discussed?

    ^^^ Word. My friend used to date a guy who was horribly threatened by vibrators and wouldn't "allow" her to have one. (She did anyway, she just didn't tell him about it.) I don't understand, how insecure would you have to be to feel threatened by a plastic toy?

  7. #7
    Banned gingerlee's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex toy ban, has this been discussed?

    I know there is a really big sex shop right over the line into TN on I-65, and there are always cars in the parking lot. There are also certain porn companies that don't ship to AL *OR* TN, but then there are companies that don't have a problem doing it. I was actually bitching about all the repression we have concerning sex in my neck of the woods a couple hours ago, because it sucks.

    Let me be naked! Let me buy porn! Let me have sex toys! Let me strip in peace!

    *Grumbles*

  8. #8
    God/dess Will's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex toy ban, has this been discussed?

    Quote Originally Posted by Yekhefah View Post
    ^^^ Word. My friend used to date a guy who was horribly threatened by vibrators and wouldn't "allow" her to have one. (She did anyway, she just didn't tell him about it.) I don't understand, how insecure would you have to be to feel threatened by a plastic toy?
    If you are theatened by, or out performed by, a plastic toy, you suck in bed. She should "allow" him to find the door out....
    A cunning linguist...

  9. #9
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Sex toy ban, has this been discussed?

    She did, eventually. He was no great loss in her life!

  10. #10
    God/dess Will's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex toy ban, has this been discussed?

    Quote Originally Posted by Yekhefah View Post
    She did, eventually. He was no great loss in her life!
    No surprise there!
    A cunning linguist...

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