so there's this customer.....
actually, let me start with a little preamble:
it's no big secret now that the typical strip club customer isn't my "type" nor is he someone i would be close friends with. i speak even of the "hot" young ones. this is not so much because of the fact that they visit strip clubs. it's more because, i generally don't have anything in common with them and they just aren't the kind of guy i go for. you know, "red blooded american male". not that i'm judging anyone who is, just making a point. so because of that, i don't usually get all friendship-like with customers. i mean, i have fun conversations a lot, but they aren't the REAL kind of fun conversations. the ones where i can "be myself" and it actually works..
you probably know what i mean.
anyway.........
so there's this customer.....
i wouldn't say he's a regular in the "usual" sense. he's a few years older than me. he comes in with some guys from his work and he generally stays a bit afterwards by himself. sometimes he'll come in alone. he generally spends about 60-100 bucks on me (not including drinks). i know it's not a lot, but i actually have FUN when he's there and i know he's giving a generous amount for his budget. not that he's poor at all, he's just not, you know, rich.
anyway, i always sit with him (unless i really need to go elsewhere) because we have such a good time. it's the closest to a real friendship vibe i've gotten at work. this has been going on for maybe a year. sometimes i wont see him for a couple weeks, sometimes i'll see him every week once or twice.
anyway, he just recently started hinting to hanging out. i've been blowing it off, untill, i just got the blatant "want to meet me for a cocktail tomorrow after you get off work" email.
FUCK
here's the problem:
i only lie about -1- thing at work. the fact that i have a boyfriend (of 4 and 1/2 years now). i didn't USED to, but i got so tired of all the questions about my relationship, that i figured it was easier this way.
i've only ever felt guilty about it once before (and i think i may have posted) but no where NEAR this bad. i have 0 interest in cheating on my boyfriend or being with anyone else...
but i REALLY like this customer as a friend.
i never lead him on or told him i would go out or anything, but the fact that he's thought this whole time i was single...
arrggg
and here's why i feel stupid:
i really thought we were hitting it off as friends. i didn't think he had any interest in seeing me. ............ i know i know i know I KNOW how ridiculous i sound. i just, i don't know, it didn't start crossing my mind till recently.
what do i do?
it's not even about getting money from him or anything either. i don't give a shit if he never spends a dime on me again... not just because he's not a big spender either. i just ........... arg! it's so frustrating. the one customer i like as a person right now and this happens.
is there any way i can tell him without
A. sounding conceited like "i know you're into me but..."
B. sounding like i've been hustling him this whole time. you know, pretending to like his jokes, etc... cause that isn't true
C. making a damned akward fool of myself
also, what do i do about this email? should i respond or just wait till he comes in (if he does) ......
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FUCK
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