I am so sorry this happened to you. It is not your fault that he did it, ot your fault that you didn't "fight back" or "take it seriously", why would anyone seriously expect their friend to hurt them so badly. It is HIS fault for not stopping when you said no.HIS FAULT. Our minds do strange things when we are in fear and being traumatized.Telling yourself ":its just one more" is how you survived that horrific moment, but it doesn't mean you LET it happen.
When I was raped, I couldn't even fight, I just lay there uncomprehending that a trusted friend would not be noticing that I was crying and asking him to stop, urgh, he tried to get me into it by going down on me, I think I have just realized why I can't orgasm with oral sex.
Big hugs for you, maybe it might help to ring up a sexual assault hotline and talk it through with someone, see if they can recommend some resources (counseling or something) that might help you.




Reply With Quote
for kiki. I know there are no words I can say to make it better, but I want you to know that you have my support.

). I would have sought out drugs and alcohol as solace.

Bookmarks