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Thread: I chickened out

  1. #1
    Member SweetHoneyHole's Avatar
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    Thumbs down I chickened out

    Well, I feel like the dumbest bitch on the planet. I went to the club, drove back and forth in front of the place for 15 mins., then drove home in tears. I didn't even went in. (to clarify, I went in on Fri. and was told to come back tonight to start) So I doubt they'd give me another chance after I didn't show up tonight.
    But thank you to those of you that answered my questions! Much appreciation!
    SHH
    Last edited by SweetHoneyHole; 12-23-2007 at 10:31 PM. Reason: to clarify

  2. #2
    God/dess
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    What stopped you from going in? Have you decided you no longer want to strip or will you try another day?

  3. #3
    AudreyLeigh
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    Ah. It was just nerves. Give it some time and try again hun!

  4. #4
    OdysseusNJ
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    Quote Originally Posted by SweetHoneyHole View Post
    Well, I feel like the dumbest bitch on the planet. I went to the club, drove back and forth in front of the place for 15 mins., then drove home in tears. I never even went in.
    But thank you to those of you that answered my questions! Much appreciation!
    SHH
    If it helps your nerves to go back your avatar is gorgeous! Good luck if you give it a second shot. Maybe it would help to just hang out at a club a few nights with a friend first to get comfortable in the atmosphere. I know a couple of dancers who did this first.

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    God/dess kitty260's Avatar
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    Awww...that's okay. It took me ages to finally go to interview with the booking agents to start dancing. A few times, I actually made it downtown just to lose my nerve and go home again. Don't worry about it! Just try again tomorrow.
    \

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    Member SweetHoneyHole's Avatar
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    Oh yeah, I still want to do it...I have wanted to since I was 16.
    But I got so nervous I thought I was going to puke.
    It was totally my nerves.
    Do they give you another chance? Or does it depend on the club? (the club near me is Cheyenne Gentlemen's Club in Roland, OK.)

    Thank you OdysseusNJ, your compliment is very sweet!

    All of you, thank you so much for even taking the time to read this.
    Have a great night!
    SHH

  7. #7
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    I agree with Odysseus that hanging out at the club should make you more comfortable. I also set a date about a month ahead of time and made myself a to-do list of things to do to get ready (buy shoes, lose weight, ect.) so when the day came I felt super ready. Let us know how it goes! I'm sure you'll be great!

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    Senior Member Angela18's Avatar
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    Checking out the club before hand really helped me out went I went in for an audition. I even went as far as planing my dance routine before hand. So when they told me to get on stage and see what I was like I would not freeze up. I still did freeze a little and my nerves where shot. But just like you SweetHoneyHole its something I wonted to do for a couple years. I knew if I did not at least try I would regret it.

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    Senior Member LittleMissy's Avatar
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    Don't feel dumb. I'm sure a lot of girls have gone through this. I know I did. I checked the place out & drove around a few times even though I already had friends who worked there. I was so scared & I didn't even know of what! so I can feel you out on it. Just give it another shot, you'll be really proud of yourself after you've accomplished it! <3 g'luck!
    "Maybe some women aren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they're supposed to run wild until they find someone - just as wild - to run with."







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    Default Re: I chickened out

    I worked as a cocktail waitress in the club for 2 weeks before switching to dancer. It helped me, b/c I got to know everyone and how the club works with my clothes ON, drummed up some regulars who couldn't wait to come back and see me nekkid, and I made pretty good money in the process.

    Maybe you can do that?

  11. #11
    Featured Member paintgoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    Hmmm.... short term fear of walking into the building... or long-term regret that you never danced. Pick one. It's one or the other.

    That being said, don't feel bad or beat yourself up. I worked with a girl who was so hot that she had a spread in penthouse five years ago (saw it with my own eyes) and she said sometimes she'd drive to work, and then drive right past it without ever going in. Everyone's had their night.

    The club should be understanding since it's holiday mayhem right now. Perhaps try again the first week of January.

    Good luck.
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  12. #12
    Member SweetHoneyHole's Avatar
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    Thumbs up Re: I chickened out

    Quote Originally Posted by paintgoddess View Post
    Hmmm.... short term fear of walking into the building... or long-term regret that you never danced. Pick one. It's one or the other.

    That being said, don't feel bad or beat yourself up. I worked with a girl who was so hot that she had a spread in penthouse five years ago (saw it with my own eyes) and she said sometimes she'd drive to work, and then drive right past it without ever going in. Everyone's had their night.

    The club should be understanding since it's holiday mayhem right now. Perhaps try again the first week of January.

    Good luck.
    I know, you are so right!! I have been kicking myself in the ass all day for not going in there last night.
    I almost called the club and asked them if they would give me another chance but I thought they'd brush me off.
    I just have to kick these nerves and do it...I KNOW I will have fun. I have ALWAYS wanted to dance in a club.
    Thank you thank you thank you for your response...immensely!! I think you have a good idea...I will go back in Jan.
    Heck, maybe they won't even remember I flaked...hee hee. *fingers crossed*
    I wish you a very Merry Christmas, and very much appreciate your taking the time to respond!

  13. #13
    Member Cheer4lyfe's Avatar
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    I think a lot of clubs will understand if they really like you from the first impression they got when they FIRST saw you. They understand it can be tough. It won't hurt to tell the truth and ask for a second chance. Maybe you could start off waitressing or bartending?

  14. #14
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    At least you got as far as getting in the car and driving there.

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    Default Re: I chickened out

    It is scary. I understand. Like others have said give it another shot. It takes balls to go into a club and start working. For the first few months i got nauseous and had diarrehea(msp) while and after i was dancing. (A little embarassing but oh well its true) We are here for u and totally understand. shift_6x

  16. #16
    PhillyDancer1982
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    Quote Originally Posted by SweetHoneyHole View Post
    Well, I feel like the dumbest bitch on the planet. I went to the club, drove back and forth in front of the place for 15 mins., then drove home in tears. I didn't even went in. (to clarify, I went in on Fri. and was told to come back tonight to start) So I doubt they'd give me another chance after I didn't show up tonight.
    But thank you to those of you that answered my questions! Much appreciation!
    SHH
    Don't feel too bad...there were so many times that I clammed up and chickened out of auditioning because I felt self-conscious, had stage fright, etc. Sometimes it just takes time, and adjusting to the environment so that you feel comfortable. Other times, however, it takes giving yourself a mental shove and just pushing yourself in there. (for me, that mental shove came in the form of being left penniless a month after my family kicked me out, with my savings dwindling to zero and my other job giving me tiny work hours and shit wages)

    I don't know your situation, but it sounds to me like you wanted to try dancing because you wanted to live the dream(since age 16) of doing it, more than just doing it out of financial desperation(as the case was for me). In that case, perhaps it is best to wait until you are more comfortable so that you can actually enjoy it. I'd suggest visiting strip clubs more as a customer, and conversing with the dancers about all of the aspects of what it's like to work there. (I used to answer questions for a LOT of female customers who were thinking of dancing, and they were surprised to hear about how friendly and positive and UNscary the workplace actually was)

    If you're worried about the dance moves, I'd suggest taking a pole dancing class(they're the new fad these days!) or perhaps renting a video on pole dancing so that you'll know a few basic moves and feel comfortable. Or if you happen to have a few dancers friends, ask them to show you some stuff. Practice so that you know what you look like and so you won't feel as self-conscious. When I first started dancing, I didn't know jack-shit about how to dance, so that was the #1 source of my stage fright/self-consciousness.

    If you're worried more about someone you know finding you there, then I'd suggest looking at clubs that are at least 1-2 hours away. This will minimize the chances of running into someone you know, which might help you to relax more, and relaxing will help you to make more money because then you won't appear as stiff.

    As far as the club...I'd suggest calling the manager and explaining that something came up, apologize, and ask if you could try again. But if you don't feel ready, that's okay too. Just take some time off and when you think you're ready, reaudition. Strip club managers probably run into a LOT of first-time dancers that either realize dancing's "not for them" or chicken out. Strip club managers run into a lot of dancers in general, so odds are that if you wait a few months and reaudition, the managers might not even remember you, esp if you change the color of your hair.

    Remember this: Dancing is not run as strictly as a regular job, so dancers flaking out, quitting without notice, showing up late or off schedule, etc is very common. Don't think that you'll be automatically banned or fired just because you didn't show up to work one day. I was in a similar situation as you and after I didn't show up at a club I was scheduled to audition at, I was afraid that I'd lost my chance so I avoided the club for a long time because I didn't want to face management after that. I realize now that I should have been more assertive and gone right back there.

  17. #17
    God/dess Lexi's Avatar
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    Quote Originally Posted by SweetHoneyHole View Post
    Well, I feel like the dumbest bitch on the planet. I went to the club, drove back and forth in front of the place for 15 mins., then drove home in tears. I didn't even went in. (to clarify, I went in on Fri. and was told to come back tonight to start) So I doubt they'd give me another chance after I didn't show up tonight.
    But thank you to those of you that answered my questions! Much appreciation!
    SHH

    Hey! Dont give up. I did the SAME exact thing my first night dancing.

    I drove a whole hour to the club, circled the place a few times, and then just drove back.

    Luckily I called and explained to the manager. (They knew it was my first time) Maybe you can say that something came up but that you would love to start on another day. Dont make it a huge deal that you didnt show. Just sound confident and I am sure they will give you another chance.

    Good luck

  18. #18
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    Girl, don't be scared! It's really not that bad. My stomach was freaking before I walked into my club and then I sat down an got "hired" and changed and was like OMG!!! then got shown around and talked to this girl and realized they were normal (well most of them) people just like us! It was so fun!

    Next time you work up the nerve to drive there just go in. JUST DO IT!! and go into the dressing room and see how normal all these girls look in the real lights and remember something to post in the "overheard in the dressing room" thread! I wanted to be a stripper since I was like 7, for real. Just turn those nerves and dreams into excited anticipation. Once you get there you'll be good to go!

  19. #19
    Senior Member Brooklynn06's Avatar
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    If it makes you feel any better, I've been dancing for 3 1/2 years. When I got pregnant, I wasn't able to dance for 6 months, my first night back after having my daughter I was wreck! I felt like the new girl all over again. But then I hit the stage and it was like I never left. So, even girls who've danced get nervous after taking some time off.

    Good luck!! I'm sure you'll do just fine after you do it once.

  20. #20
    Member SweetHoneyHole's Avatar
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    OMGosh, you chicks rock! Thank you all immensely for responding to this! I haven't given up the dancing dream...I just decided to take ya'll's advice and take a slower approach. (the night I went into the club & got hired was a "bad money situation" night) Now that we found a temporary money fix, aka borrowed from in-laws, hee, I am going to visit the club as a customer a couple times. I'll take my hubby, and I'll buy him dances, ask the girls some questions, and tip them super super good for their time and so they remember me and think well of me.
    Then, when I am more familiar and comfortable with the atmosphere and the girls/staff there, then I think I will feel more comfortable dancing there.
    In the meantime, I'll start purchasing some stripper shoes and outfits so that when I do go back to that club to dance then I will feel prepared and there should be nothing stopping me.
    I think that is a good plan...yeah?
    Again, super big thanks to all of you...I was a tad bit intimidated at first, but your kind responses have really made me feel a lot better.
    HAVE A WONDERFUL NEW YEAR!!
    SHH

  21. #21
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    Sounds like a great plan! Good luck and keep us updated.

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    Veteran Member sexysunny's Avatar
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    good luck babe! starting in a quiet time is a really good move. give yourself some time to realax. let us know what happens!
    SEXY SUNNY

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    Senior Member Angela18's Avatar
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    Good to hear it SweetHoneyHole. Thats close to what I did be for I started dancing most of the time. I asked the girls I worked with alot of questions while I waitressed during the evening hours and during the day when it was slow I would come in early and get stage time. I was able to get more one on one time with the custie's. They would tell me what they liked and didn't like too.

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    Veteran Member katerina29's Avatar
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    I thought about dancing for years before I got up the courage. I started as a waitress, then started dancing at a dive and doing the day shifts to build confidence. When I got the hang of things I moved to a better club. I wouldnt bother going in with your husband and tipping the girls it may make things uncomfortable if you end up working there.

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    God/dess whirlerz's Avatar
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    Default Re: I chickened out

    Soorry, bumpie for this too....I know it's old, but some good comments!


    MANY MEN WANTED TO LAY ME DOWN, BUT FEW WANTED TO LIFT ME UP

    -Eartha Kitt

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