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Thread: psych problems and pregnancy/children

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    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Default psych problems and pregnancy/children

    I am very unsure about whether I ever want to be a parent.

    One of the reasons for this is because of my anxiety problems. I take anti depressants (SSRI's) and I don't know whether I would cope with pregnancy and then being a parent.

    For those of you who have similar problems with depression, anxiety or other mental illness:

    - did being pregnant have an effect on this? did your symptoms worsen?
    - were you able to still take your SSRI's while pregnant?
    - or did this stop you from ever having kids?
    - did you get post natal depression?
    - how do you cope with being a parent and having your own psychological problems?

    It really concerns me that if I do decide that I want to be a parent that it won't be possible due to my condition.
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    Default Re: psych problems and pregnancy/children

    I loved being pregnant. The hormones seemed to take away all my symptoms of bipolar. Of course after I had him all the same symptoms came back.

    There isn't any anti-depressants, mood stabilizers, or anti-anxiety drugs that have been proven not to have any effects on the fetus. Some are lower risk than others. But I felt, I could not take that chance.

    The way I cope with bipolar and my child is to send him to an aunt's or grandma's house if I feel that I cannot take care of him and his daddy's is working. I have never had to ask yet. Someone always asks to have him for the night once a month. Shawn has a job where he works 3-4 12 hour shifts a week.

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    Default Re: psych problems and pregnancy/children

    After I had my daughter I had the worst Post partum depression. I was thinking very horrible things. I told myself that if she died it would be a relief. Fucked up, huh? So I don't know how worse depression would be if you went through the post partum crap.

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    Featured Member Hatshepsut's Avatar
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    Default Re: psych problems and pregnancy/children

    I don't have any advice about pregnancy/childrearing and your condition, but I find it admirable that you are looking out for the welfare of yourself and others. My mom didn't. My mom had severe issues (molested by a family member as a kid, raised by parents who were in WWII Japan, panic attack disorder, depression, etc), but she didn't do a damned thing about it. You see, Japanese people don't believe in mental illness. As the oldest, I got the brunt of things. From a young age, I had to raise the kids because she was either pregnant or staying in bed all day. There was also a fuck ton of Freudian projection. In fact, she kept having kids so she wouldn't have to deal with her problems. She also took her shit out on me a lot. My dad acknowledges and confirms that this is true. Being pregnant and having kids gave her an identity and an excuse to hide from the world. When you have kids, you owe it to yourself and others to be a good parent and take care of yourself.

    I admire the fact that you acknowledge that you have a problem. However, if you do have kids, don't just acknowledge it. I absolutely fucking despise people who acknowledge their problems, yet do nothing and use their cognition as an excuse for their actions ("Oh, it's the way I am"). DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. Find a good counselor. Make sure that you have a good support system. Visit your psychiatrist often before, during, and after pregnancy so you don't go batshit due to changes in your body changing the kinetics and dynamics of the drugs.

    Good luck!
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    Default Re: psych problems and pregnancy/children

    Quote Originally Posted by Hatshepsut View Post
    I don't have any advice about pregnancy/childrearing and your condition, but I find it admirable that you are looking out for the welfare of yourself and others. My mom didn't. My mom had severe issues (molested by a family member as a kid, raised by parents who were in WWII Japan, panic attack disorder, depression, etc), but she didn't do a damned thing about it. You see, Japanese people don't believe in mental illness. As the oldest, I got the brunt of things. From a young age, I had to raise the kids because she was either pregnant or staying in bed all day. There was also a fuck ton of Freudian projection. In fact, she kept having kids so she wouldn't have to deal with her problems. She also took her shit out on me a lot. My dad acknowledges and confirms that this is true. Being pregnant and having kids gave her an identity and an excuse to hide from the world. When you have kids, you owe it to yourself and others to be a good parent and take care of yourself.
    My fear of being that kind of mom is one of the big reasons I'm not going to have kids. Well, that and I don't want to potentially give my kids mental issues like the ones I deal with.

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    Default Re: psych problems and pregnancy/children

    According to my father my mother never showed symptoms of mental illness until after I was born, however, my grandmother (her mother) disagrees. Mental illness runs heavy in my family. I know when I am not on meds I am crippled with anxiety issues. Because of this I think the less selfish thing to do would be for me not to birth children. I am not totally closed off to adoption. Of course then you still don't know what the background is. I am pretty selfish with my time. I throughly enjoy being alone quite a bit when I am not at school. I see babies and think for a moment I would like one but then I think about the possibility of the child having to suffer with a mental illness or my not being able to give that child all it needs. I am pretty wrapped up in my career right now. By the time I get really established I will probably be 32. I'll probably be taking care of my grandmother at that point. I don't see it happening and think it's more than likely best that way.

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    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: psych problems and pregnancy/children

    My mum has bipolar. It was not diagnosed until I was about 14 years old - when she had her first breakdown. She suffered terrible post partum depression but did not have another episode until I was 14. She has had several episodes since then but her condition is mostly controlled with her meds.

    One of my friends said she continued to take her SSRI's during her pregnancy and her doctor approved of it. I don't know tho it would def also be absorbed by the fetus and I would be concerned about the effect it would have on a developing brain.
    Quote Originally Posted by Corgan View Post
    when regulars turn cheap, it's time to kill em off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lysondra View Post
    You're still a vagina.
    There are many stereotypes about the industry that I work in. Sometimes they can be true but human beings are very diverse creatures and cannot be pigeon-holed into one category.

    Some of the most effortlessly beautiful, kind, intelligent, successful, motivated, driven and ridiculously hilarious women that I have ever met have been dancers. I've met the best friends that I've ever had in this industry.

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