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Thread: going to club with wife

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    Default going to club with wife

    Hi everyone and thanks in advance for any replies.

    I have gone to a club a few times with my wife and my experience has been disappointing. It seems when it’s just the two of us; we have a hard time getting any attention at all. I am one of the lucky ones that has an attractive wife who enjoys the club quite a bit. We make a game of tipping each and every girl on stage by taking turns (not all girls are equal… so sometimes you get lucky and sometimes you don’t), and if we both like the girl we both get to tip ;-). We drink and smile and laugh. We are never rude or make disparaging comments. Sometimes, we are the only ones who tip at all (because not all dancers are created equal I guess).

    And now the problem…. We get avoided like we have the plague. We are both attractive (her more so than me!), so it isn’t that we repulse any dancers. Last week, my wife actually went off and ASKED several girls if they would come to our table and dance, and each said yes and never showed. The place was not busy. After about 1.5 hours, someone did show (a girl we tipped well when she was on stage) and we simply asked her if girls were avoiding us because of her, and she replied honestly…. Yes.

    I realize that many would say try a different club, but this one (Oasis in Atlanta) is one of the better clubs and close to our home (makes a big difference when you have a few drinks)

    I have read the threads and understand that sometimes the girl customers get a bad rap, but that stereotypical behavior is the exception, not the rule. So, how do we get any attention at all? How crazy is that to even ask? The wife generally wears jeans and a blouse that shows off her girls, but I have been advising her against wearing skirts or anything. The odd time we do get dances, mine is usually so tame that it’s almost an air dance (not a high contact club, but a far way from air dance… maybe medium contact?). We do our best to reassure the dancers that she isn’t the jealous type and we are here because we ENJOY it… but to no avail.

    So, please heap your wisdom on me so that we can enjoy our next visit. If the wife feels it’s a waste of time, it may end up our last visit for a while. That would be a bummer ;-)

  2. #2
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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    It's good your wife got up and asked the girls. I'm a dancer and still a female custy at other clubs and I know it's hard for me to get attention from the girls.

    1. Maybe ask girls yourself instead of your wife.
    2. Ask girls when you tip them to come see you after their stage.
    3. Tell waitress/server that you are interested in a certain girl and see if they will pass along the message.

  3. #3
    Chicagoeditor
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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    Quote Originally Posted by NewMoon View Post
    3. Tell waitress/server that you are interested in a certain girl and see if they will pass along the message.
    That's a sure-fire approach.

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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    Interesting... I'm not married but I have gone to clubs with women before, never had a problem like that, and all the times I have seen couples together in clubs, never seen them have a problem like that. I've actually had dancers tell me to bring my g/f or wife or whatever...

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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    Quote Originally Posted by NewMoon View Post
    ...
    3. Tell waitress/server that you are interested in a certain girl and see if they will pass along the message...
    Fantastic advice. Make sure to tip the waitress, you are taking away from her money-making time by asking for a favor, so she'd appreciate compensation! And it can be hard to get attention as a couple, instead of a single man, because some women who come to the club with their husbands/boyfriends are not as cool as your wife. Many are complete bitches, and totally jealous. Once you get a girl to your table and have conversation/buy dances, you'll start to get to know the girls at your club. You'll find the ones you have the most fun with, and when they see you again, they'll want to come see you.

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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    Quote Originally Posted by PrettyCurlieQ View Post
    Fantastic advice. Make sure to tip the waitress, you are taking away from her money-making time by asking for a favor, so she'd appreciate compensation! And it can be hard to get attention as a couple, instead of a single man, because some women who come to the club with their husbands/boyfriends are not as cool as your wife. Many are complete bitches, and totally jealous. Once you get a girl to your table and have conversation/buy dances, you'll start to get to know the girls at your club. You'll find the ones you have the most fun with, and when they see you again, they'll want to come see you.
    I am usually a good tipper. I even tip the waitress when she makes change in between drinks ;-)

    I understand about some women not being cool. I have to tell you, it is what I was worried about our first time, but she couldn't have been more the opposite. She is VERY cool in a club.

    We do have one girl who "knows" us, but she doesn't work every night. One of my buddies has suggested he and I do "recon" without the wife. Find girls, build customer relationships, and give them fair warning that we will be back with our wives on such and such night. I see that as having potential.

    I guess I was just wondering if there was some secrete handshake or something so the girls know we are cool ;-). OK, having said that I now realize that I am a dweeb.

    But at least a good natured dweeb!

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    God/dess Andygirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    If someone just wantes me to come to the table to dance, then I'm not interested. I won't hurry over for a few bucks. If someone wants a private dance, that's another thing entirely. But don't ask me over to your table to waste my time. I hate that, and it happens all of the time with female patrons.

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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    Quote Originally Posted by Andygirl View Post
    If someone just wantes me to come to the table to dance, then I'm not interested. I won't hurry over for a few bucks. If someone wants a private dance, that's another thing entirely. But don't ask me over to your table to waste my time. I hate that, and it happens all of the time with female patrons.
    It would help if I explained. It's Atlanta, not Vegas (or other areas). Tip on stage $1 (repeat as often as desired). Lap dances $10 (repeat as often as desired). VIP.. Never been, but from what girls have told me, between $200 and $300. I think the room is $50 of that. So there is no private area other than VIP. I think in Vegas it was private dance was $30 for another room sort of thing. Bless you if you can only do VIP and nothing else. I think many would be envious of you! But in this club, $10 dances seem to be the norm, not the exception. I hope that helps and I have read this correctly. If I am way off, I apologize in advance.

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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    I do not understand the difference between table dance and private? Said from the wife of Abacusdog . Where we go I guess thats table and VIP, but thats very different?

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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    I find this very strange. I always LOVE couples. Maybe you get airdances because they are not familiar with dancing for women. Dancing for a woman is kind of akward if you havent done it before.

  11. #11
    buffie06
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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    I stay away from women customers completely now (and I love women), but it is such a hit or miss with them. I have had too many bad experiences with jealous crazies that I don't want to waste my time trying to find out if they are going to be cool. I liked the advice about asking a waitress, b/c the waitresses at our club will come and ask specifically who doesnt mind dancing for women. We can decline and she will eventually find someone meeting the description you required, etc. A plus is to have the girl specifically ask, instead of yourself, so the dancer can get a feel for her attitude.

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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    I guess my other question would be, in knowing that there are these "jealous crazies" wives/girlfriends etc. that have given you'all hard times in the past... any one know why they would go to a stip club then?

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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    Quote Originally Posted by Lope View Post
    I do not understand the difference between table dance and private? Said from the wife of Abacusdog . Where we go I guess thats table and VIP, but thats very different?
    Depends on the club. In mine there are 3 options: table dance, friction dance and champange room.

    Differances:

    Table dances: $10 per song,air dance, not supposed to touch the girl(though some girls let them get away with this), right out on the floor...so your $10 is allowing every random perv around you to watch

    Friction dances: $20 per song, full friction(I grind on you with panties on), in a back room with partitioned booths so there is a bit of privacy...you arent paying to let someone else watch(except the few people getting dances in booths accross from you)

    Chanpagne room: From $400-$600 for 1/2 an hour. Includes room, bottle of champagne, and the girls fee. Here I can give full nude friction. It is totally private...nobody else can watch...it is behind a curtain..the couches are much more comfortable and you dont have to worry about counting dances...you can just have fun until they say your time is up. It is also a bit quiter so you can have an actual conversation(or hear the dirty talk if thats wht you like!) without screaming.


    I rarely do table dances and ONLY if asked. I dont bring them up. Taking my clothes off for $10 is a pain in the ass.

    If $10 dances are common there...make it clear you want her to dance for you. Not..."come over and see us when you can"...but "We'd like you to dance for us if you are free". Offering a drink too is a nice touch.

    I have had several cpls that were good customers and I very much enjoyed them .One such cpl came in last week and wanted me to come over, but I was slammed busy and never got there.

    Maybe you are going on nights that are super busy? I'll take a guy over a cpl most times if they've both asked for my company since theres a better chance the guy will spend more.I'll go to the cpl if I have time...but they wont be top priority.

    Try going on a quieter night...during the week maybe, and see if theres any differance.

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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    Quote Originally Posted by abacusdog View Post
    ...Tip on stage $1 ...
    If you tip more than ones, it shows you're interested in spending money. And yes, we want you to have fun, but we're at the club to work and make money. Therefore, if you spend, you get the attention. If someone tips me a twenty or bigger onstage, I definitely go find them afterwards, because that generally means they want to buy dances. And I don't do table dances. Our club allows them, but I hate dancing in the middle of the crowded floor.

    The moral of the story is: The more money you give to a dancer, the more attention you will recieve from her.

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    God/dess Sophia_Starina's Avatar
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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    The best advice that I can give is to approach the dancer.

    I will venture to say that 95% of my customers are male. The other 5% is couples. Having a lady around takes me waaaaay out of my comfort zone. Even though I love dancing for couples it isn't always easy to get past the first hurdle of coming up to an entity that is relatively unfamiliar.

    Either you or the wifey/girlfriend/date can come up to a dancer you both like and say "hi..." go from there. Once the dancer is approached with positive energy she will give it to you back 1000%.
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    Featured Member iseestars's Avatar
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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    I think personally it sounds kind of strange that over and over again these dancers aren't coming over to you after being asked....Usually when someone asks me to come over, I get over there as fast as I can and if I can't, I will always say that I'm not going to. I don't really go up to female/couple customers except when we do our lapdance specials and I'll ask them if they want one real quick but if I had a female who was tipping me in a non offense way and asked me to come over, I'd be over there. I have to say though, I have been to strip clubs where I will lay my dollar on the stage and wait for the dancer to come over and have had it happen where they completely ignore me. Have you ever tried going on couple's night if they have one and seeing if any other couples have luck getting dances?

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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    Quote Originally Posted by abacusdog View Post

    I understand about some women not being cool. I have to tell you, it is what I was worried about our first time, but she couldn't have been more the opposite. She is VERY cool in a club.
    also, define "Very Cool." Some of us are used to female dancers, and we either get good vibes or jealous/other bad vibes.

    Maybe what you are seeing as very cool, the dancers are seeing otherwise?

    just a thought....

    The only ladies I would NOT dance for, when they are with their men, are the ones where it's painfully obvious they are just there trying to make their man happy, but really they are burning or crying inside.
    ~Love From Alexis

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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    Quote Originally Posted by Lope View Post
    I guess my other question would be, in knowing that there are these "jealous crazies" wives/girlfriends etc. that have given you'all hard times in the past... any one know why they would go to a stip club then?
    Maybe to babysit their boyfriends and make sure they behave?

  19. #19
    stellaforstars
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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    I agree with the ladies who are suggesting that you might be approaching this in too subtle a fashion.

    Make sure they know that your intention is to spend good money on them and then live up to your word.

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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    I love women and dancing for women, but from a $$ making perspective, I definitely approach women/couples last of all.

    Why? Because if I approach a guy, any kind of guy, I stand a really good chance of getting him to buy multiple dances in a row. In my experience women/couples very seldom buy sequences of dances, or maybe 2 in a row MAX.

    So approaching women/couples is a less efficient use of my time.

    How is this relevant to you, the OP? Perhaps you should suggest to the dancers you like that you want to buy more than one dance!

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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    Real simple. I'm scared of girls. I'm a tomboy, and know how to relate to guys really well, but the only other chicks I understand how to deal with at all are other strippers.

    So mostly, I avoid women/couples unless they make it super obvious that they're into me and want me to come by and do some dances. So yeah. Go up to the girl and let her know you want to spend. Or better, let your wife do it. That would especially give me the picture.

  22. #22
    Kaylinn
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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    Quote Originally Posted by abacusdog View Post
    I am usually a good tipper. I even tip the waitress when she makes change in between drinks ;-)

    I understand about some women not being cool. I have to tell you, it is what I was worried about our first time, but she couldn't have been more the opposite. She is VERY cool in a club.

    We do have one girl who "knows" us, but she doesn't work every night. One of my buddies has suggested he and I do "recon" without the wife. Find girls, build customer relationships, and give them fair warning that we will be back with our wives on such and such night. I see that as having potential.

    I guess I was just wondering if there was some secrete handshake or something so the girls know we are cool ;-). OK, having said that I now realize that I am a dweeb.

    But at least a good natured dweeb!

    I think the recon idea is a good one. Meet a few girls you like, buydances, spend money, make sure you remember their names!!
    Talk about yoru wife and build her up about how cool she is in a club, loves to get dances, watch you getdances...Ask the dancer you like when they work, and tell her you will be back in with your wife.
    Then when you take your wife back, you can request the girls you made friends with previously. Since they know you and you spent money on them, they know it won't be a waste of time to come over.

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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    Quote Originally Posted by abacusdog View Post
    Hi everyone and thanks in advance for any replies.

    [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=3]. We make a game of tipping each and every girl on stage by taking turns (not all girls are equal… so sometimes you get lucky and sometimes you don’t), and if we both like the girl we both get to tip ;-). We drink and smile and laugh. We are never rude or make disparaging comments. Sometimes, we are the only ones who tip at all (because not all dancers are created equal I guess).[
    Not to be a bitch, but everyone sitting at the stage should tip each girl a minimum of a dollar a song, per person. Just because you are a couple doesn't mean you can tip like one person. If you don't like a girl you should get up and walk away from her stage.
    Sexy Jasmine after getting fucked over at work:

    God loves strippers and when guys do things like that its an automatic ticket to HELL!


    Quote Originally Posted by anomar View Post
    Perhaps you stopped spending money on her. Strippers need money to operate. They are like coin operated juke-boxes of love.

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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    Oasis is a very fast-paced, busy club. Especially on the weekends. A dancer can get a $20 stage tip and not even be able to find the customer afterwards!! Make sure you have her attention and point to where you are sitting when you tell her to stop by. Try a week night, also.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lysondra View Post
    Strippers are like ninjas. You never know how many there are or if the person next to you is one.
    Quote Originally Posted by Emily View Post
    ...I assume you probably don't want to deal with pervs, and the guys that just don't give a fuck about money are like unicorns...
    Quote Originally Posted by Sinder View Post
    I know I have said it before, and I'll say it again.... THE VAGINA IS NOT A CLOWN CAR!


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    Default Re: going to club with wife

    Thanks Paintgoddess... we were there this Sat.(OGE) and had the same luck. There are a couple of girls we know, but the rest seem to only hang with the all guy tables. Also, last Sat. was pre-xmas weekend and this one was pre-New Years. I wonder if that had any effect? There seem to be less girls?

    A few weeks ago we went on a Friday and met up with my husbands friends, it went much better then.

    I just thought going together would be a fun experience, and damn... I feel like a killjoy!

    And no offense taken Vegas Princess... the tables are set back from the stages, not right up against. So we are not taking away business by any means. Where we go I at times feel bad b/c the girls can go a full song (or 2)and no one will go up (?) don't get that? But hey... the owner is the dumbass that put all those tv's with sports on them .

    Anyway... we would spend the money if we could. My husband joked maybe we should go sit at a table with a bunch of men? Who knows? We did have two girls approach us... thats much better than last time. I guess all 5 feet of me is becoming less intimidating... ha ha ha!

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