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Thread: Well, my BA money is gone. :(

  1. #1
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    Default Well, my BA money is gone. :(

    I was going to use my year-end distribution for my BA I have been wanting for ELEVEN YEARS, but our car died two weeks ago and I have to get another one.

    I'm really depressed about it, since I am over thirty (more than one year) and it's probably going to be most of the year before we can save up a decent amount for the downpayment on the BA, now. Plus the fact that we will have a car payment factored in. I was hoping to get the BA in January and go back to work in Feb.; hopefully making enough to get another car then, but it is not to be.

    I can't help feeling I am going to be too old to get back into the business by the time I get the BA . I don't want to be one of those desperate, leathery-looking older dancers that some men get just because of the large tits or the less hassle of a younger girl - you know what I mean.

    I don't think I'm ugly,but I am not an absolute beauty queen either. My body doesn't look bad, just need some firming up (my posts in Body Biz can tell you my cellulite is well under control, almost completely gone) and I don't carry a lot of extra weight ( I want to lose about 8 to maybe 10 at the MOST); I just feel..discouraged. My face is ok, no wrinkles of a noticable sort, and I've been seriously stepping up the facial care this year, but I have slight cheek sag that is common in my family and that will only dissapear with 1) serious weight loss (too much for me to look normal other areas) or 2) surgery.

    My teeth are not in great shape. No pain or major cavities, but need some fills, straightening, and whitening. I can hide that pretty well with OTC stuff until I can pay for serious work, but again....no money for it now.

    I've been in the biz long enough to be as objective as I can about myself. I think I have a great attitude and I am a hard worker, but I really wanted to make a splash before I quit entirely. I really like doing this, so very much. I like men, I enjoy meeting all the different types of women who do this also. It's in my blood. I am heartbroken about the fact that I may have to just let it go, because I am a Leo...if I can't be one of the best, I don't even want to be there. I feel as if I never reached my full potential in this area, and that makes me dissapointed in myself - that I may never get to reach that potential.

    Husband tells me not to be so negative,and that I look in my late 20s - but he's my husband. However,he has been in the biz for 18 years now, so I give it some weight, just not a lot, I guess.

    It's not like me to be depressed, I just...have a lot on my mind at the moment, and the disappointment of losing the money to something else just did it for me.I've been waiting for so long...

    Just as a side note,since you may be wondering: I don't have ANY credit cards, and I don't want any. My credit is not so wonderful, but not in the crapper either, mostly due to my fiance who passed in 2001, suddenly. A lot of bills came due rather quickly, and a lot fell by the wayside.

    A ray of hope is a BA doctor one of husband's girls at Men's Club went to, she has repos and evictions on her credit and she got financed by the office, so I may have some leeway there - but I haven't seen his work, so I don't know if I 'm going to like it.

    Thanks for letting me vent. I'm just pretty down about it all, and not feeling like I'm going to be able to get out of this any time soon.

    Hopefully a new year will bring fresh optimisim.
    Grinding is for coffee and meat.
    "I want to entertain people who wish to be entertained, not be an expensive but poor substitute for someone who can't find themselves a prostitute."-Asurfel
    Those Who Hear Not The Music Think The Dancers Mad.
    “Belgian Trappist Organically Farmed Multiple Orgasm Inducing. Bed Shaking, Neighbors Complaining, Heirloom Radishes”

  2. #2
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: Well, my BA money is gone. :(

    It's SugarDaddy For Tetas Time! Heh.

    Seriously, don't beat yourself up. & I'm also a girl who will refuse to get onstage if I don't look great (hence my hiatus while seriously ill)...You are having normal growing pains in the biz.

    I know for sure older dancers don't all fall by the wayside- they consistently out-earn me. Look at the SILVER LINING of this situation- you have more time to look for a good surgeon or find a different, possibly better way to finance the BA.

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    Default Re: Well, my BA money is gone. :(

    Ya know, Maxine, you are so right. Thanks for the reminder.
    I'm a firm believer in everything-happens-for-a-reason, but had lost sight of that lately. Maybe the financing is going to come in some other way. I just don't like being beholden to anyone; I hope it does not involve that too much.

    I'm sure I'll feel better soon. It's probably just the dark of winter blahs. Off to the sunbed with me!
    Grinding is for coffee and meat.
    "I want to entertain people who wish to be entertained, not be an expensive but poor substitute for someone who can't find themselves a prostitute."-Asurfel
    Those Who Hear Not The Music Think The Dancers Mad.
    “Belgian Trappist Organically Farmed Multiple Orgasm Inducing. Bed Shaking, Neighbors Complaining, Heirloom Radishes”

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    Default Re: Well, my BA money is gone. :(

    There's always the good ol' trick of the tax deduction for 'professional sized' breast implants - which I assume would be fairly valuable since you are married (i.e. the write-off from your BA could be used to reduce hubby's income tax as well as your own). The only kicker is that in order to qualify you need to get your implants filled to over 1000cc !

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    Default Re: Well, my BA money is gone. :(

    Are your boobs the only thing really holding you back, dancing wise? I know it's less than ideal (I know how it is to want to make a splash and look HOT) but if you go in and work and at least bring in something extra you'll earn that money faster.

    If that one doctors work if reputable and your style, then go for it. But if it is anything less don't do it, no matter how tempting. I garentee getting them and spending the money and not loving them will really discourage you, work wise and put more financial stress on the situation.

    I say go get made up, new hair, nails ect. and try it again! You might be surprised how you fall back into things, plus you'll be motivated to get those boobies! Good luck with whatever you decide to do

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    God/dess velvet's Avatar
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    Default Re: Well, my BA money is gone. :(

    why dont you see if you can get financed for a car with no money down?
    right now is a great time to try. they are trying to get rid of the 07's.
    try kia. you can get a brand new car with a bumper to bumper warranty for 100,000 miles. the resale value of them has gone up and the cars are nicer than they used to be. we did this when my husband was first out of college. we now have had two kia's and they have been great cars.
    hang on to that BA money. it will spike your confidence and money!
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  7. #7
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: Well, my BA money is gone. :(

    ^^^That's what I was thinking!

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    Default Re: Well, my BA money is gone. :(

    Sorry to hear that hun.
    I waited a long time to get my rhinoplasty and it got really frustrating waiting.

    I hope u can find a solution and get your boobies.
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    There are many stereotypes about the industry that I work in. Sometimes they can be true but human beings are very diverse creatures and cannot be pigeon-holed into one category.

    Some of the most effortlessly beautiful, kind, intelligent, successful, motivated, driven and ridiculously hilarious women that I have ever met have been dancers. I've met the best friends that I've ever had in this industry.

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    Default Re: Well, my BA money is gone. :(

    Quote Originally Posted by lildreamer316 View Post
    I don't want to be one of those desperate, leathery-looking older dancers that some men get just because of the large tits or the less hassle of a younger girl - you know what I mean.


    I've been in the biz long enough to be as objective as I can about myself. I think I have a great attitude and I am a hard worker, but I really wanted to make a splash before I quit entirely. I really like doing this, so very much. I like men, I enjoy meeting all the different types of women who do this also. It's in my blood. I am heartbroken about the fact that I may have to just let it go, because I am a Leo...if I can't be one of the best, I don't even want to be there. I feel as if I never reached my full potential in this area, and that makes me dissapointed in myself - that I may never get to reach that potential.
    Those two paragraphs sound exactly like me! I quit dancing last March, and although I miss it, I realize that the sun has set on my career as a dancer. It is kind of depressing.

    I got my BA in 2004 at the age of 34. I felt so much better about myself after getting it done. I used to be borderline neurotic about personal care and upkeep to the point that eating anything with sugar was forbidden and working out 6 days a week was normal for me. UGH! That is no way to live.

    The BA allowed me to relax in other areas of my life and helped me accept my (aging) body in a very youth-centric career. My last 2-3 years dancing were the best of my entire career. I was happy with what I accomplished and felt good calling it quits when I did.

    FWIW, I re-financed my mortgage to afford my BA. I felt it was totally worth it. Maybe you can finance the car purchase to go forward with your BA plans?


    Promote yourself and earn more money! This is a business that is owned by strippers for strippers. Let's make that money!


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    Default Re: Well, my BA money is gone. :(

    I will never buy a another new car. You should look into local auctions for used (sometimes slightly wrecked) autos. I have friends driving basically new luxury cars that cost less than 4K.

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    Default Re: Well, my BA money is gone. :(

    Hey, thanks everyone for the supportive and informative replies. I really appreciate it.

    I perked up a bit after deciding to place my trust in the Universe (yes, I'm all spiritual-crazy like that,but it works for me!) and got financed for an 03 car. The perk of this financing is that it will report to the credit bureaus for both me and husband every thirty days, and it is a direct draft out of our checking acct.; which makes it almost impossible to miss a payment. AND, the payments are under $250, and the loan includes a warranty AND gap insurance! So I think we did pretty well, considering. This should up my credit score so that I will probably be able to qualify for a loan for the BA within a year or two.

    Mostly, I just have to hope that I don't look my age. I am in good health and have no problems with movement, etc.; so if I can just keep up appearances I think I may still have a chance. I keep my hair, nails and tan up constantly, but just FYI, we don't have anyone we can trust for regular babysitting duties, which is why I haven't been able to get back to work. Also, can't really afford it until season picks up for husband in Charlotte. It shouldn't be too long, now.

    When I can take some decent pictures I will post and you all can give me an informed opinion then.
    Grinding is for coffee and meat.
    "I want to entertain people who wish to be entertained, not be an expensive but poor substitute for someone who can't find themselves a prostitute."-Asurfel
    Those Who Hear Not The Music Think The Dancers Mad.
    “Belgian Trappist Organically Farmed Multiple Orgasm Inducing. Bed Shaking, Neighbors Complaining, Heirloom Radishes”

  12. #12
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: Well, my BA money is gone. :(

    ^Cool, can't wait to see the pics.

    Happy to hear you found a good car deal. Wish me the same luck ; P

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