I figured this thread will be very humorous. So I gotta ask: Out of all the jobs you(or a friend) has had, what was the meanest thing you ever said or did to a customer? Please feel free to include retail, fast food, etc jobs as well.
My friend M--k, at the deli of Acme Supermarket:
Disgruntled male customer: "WTF $%#&@*!&!&#$ what do you mean you're sold out of this product?!" (starts arguing heatedly with M--k because the deli is sold out of the meat he wanted) "DO YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE?"
M--k: (nonchalantly, casually) No, actually I don't. Do you value yours?
Disgruntled male customerin a snobby, condescending tone) Yes I do, but I'd give up my life to protect my kid here. (points to toddler in stroller)
M--k: Ahhhh the answer's simple then. THE KID GOES FIRST.
Disgruntled male customer: (turns a pale of white, whiter than a sheet, look of fear on his face, then runs off to customer service to snitch out M--k)*
* M--k works 3 nights/week at Acme but gets reported to the customer service desk by angry customers about 4-7 times per week!
Another time at Acme Supermarket:
Old lady customer: Hi. Do you have [asks for some foreign-sounding delicacy meat product)
M--k: (splutters) WHAT?! (looks at her as though she just said "Your face is green and you have aliens coming out of your ears) I never heard of it before in my life.
Me at my current club, trying to sell a customer a shot:
Asshole drunk guy: "Hey whasssup! We're all partyin' over here! Yeah I'll take a shot. What do you got?"
I point out each type of shot and when I reach "Rocky Mountain Motherfucker," he puts his hand up to my face(as if to say "talk to the hand") and says, "Black motherfucker? Puh-lease" implying that I'm a racist when I'm NOT.
During this time, he is rudely stiffing the dancers on their tips and saying "That don't do nothing for me" when the one dancer shakes her ass in hopes that it'll motivate him to tip her(she just got off stage).
So I correct him, starting to get impatient with his overall rudeness. The guy demands Hennessy. For a $5 shot? WTF? I tell him we don't have that, and I end up explaining every freakin ingredient in each type of shot. He agrees on the Red Devil shot.
Another girl comes over, he is all snide and rude and not tipping. I try to coax him into tipping. He says "Gimme my shot, gimme my shot!" He starts getting irate and violent.
I start to give it to him and he says, "Hennessy, right?" after all that we already went through!
I say "no" and he says "Then I don't want it! Gimme my money back! I'm only taking it if you tell me it's Hennessy."
So I say, "Fine, it's Hennessy. Is that what you want, me telling you it's Hennessy?" He knows exactly what it is, and is just trying to play me.
He says "No way, get off me, you're not feeding me the shot."
So I teasingly try to entice him by climbing up on his lap, and he tries to push me off. "Don't even bother," he says snottily, "I'm way stronger than you."
"Oh yeah? Well I've raped guys before hahaha," I say jokingly.
"Gimme my money back," he barks, all PMS-y.
So I say, "I don't know if I'm able to after you already agreed to it. I have to go consult with the manager."
Right as I try to walk away, he PULLS my arm and I almost drop all my shots.
So I yell as I yank my arm away, "GET OFF ME, YOU COCKSUCKING COWBOY!" Hahahahahahahahahaha.
Good thing that guy got kicked out! Haha!


in a snobby, condescending tone) Yes I do, but I'd give up my life to protect my kid here. (points to toddler in stroller)
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I LOVE how you started it off by saying "the meanest thing a collective group of customers ever did" to you haha.
)
So one time when he visited my club while I was selling shots/waitressing, I was being even more of a jerk than usual to the flippant, snide cheap bastards. I was mostly doing this to entertain M--k. That night, guys were being cheaper and more saucy and sharp-tongued than usual. I was retaliating with snide comments myself, things like "Well the 'customer is always right' thing doesn't apply to you because I don't consider you a customer since you're not buying or tipping anything."
I don't think my feelings have ever been that hurt before by a customer. Here I was, trying to be pleasant and attempt to make up for any incompetency I had as a result of being brand new, and they used it as an opportunity to tear me apart. I was trying to be nice, but apparently my niceness was about as annoying as Barney the Purple Dinosaur. It was soooo mortifying.
Fucking cunts.

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