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Thread: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

  1. #1
    Member Alpaca's Avatar
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    Default I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    Hello everyone. I have kind of a confession... I've been a silent member of this site for a long time. I didn't have anything useful to offer, so I didn't post anything until last week, when I asked for advice on LA clubs (thanks so much to the ladies who helped me out) but after my first night at an LA club (Friday), I think I'm going to need some kind of support system. I tried to do a second night at the club, but had to just turn around and come home because I started crying on the way there!! I was prepared to deal with low money and high hustle/contact, and knew from reading posts on here that the atmosphere would be less than pleasant, but.... I don't even know how to describe it. I've danced around clubs in the midwest for two years that were high hustle/contact and have always been confident, happy, and a good money-maker. I love this job, and have learned to deal with what I thought were all kinds of negative people and situations. One night in the valley and I'm reduced to feeling sick and miserable. I really had good intentions to go try it again tonight, but just couldn't. Ack. I know I just need to keep looking and I'll find a club I can work in, but Friday was just so horrible. I'm an emotionally strong, stable person, but you must have to have your soul coated in titanium to keep it intact in the clubs around here. I have a million times more respect for you ladies that have prevailed.

    So.... that's my rant. Thanks for listening. I don't have anyone to talk to out here, so to be able to type this out where at least one person will probably read it and sympathize helps a lot. I'm going to drink a bottle of wine and spend quality time with my cat.

  2. #2
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    Oh, honey. I'm so sorry. I have nothing to offer but a cyber-hug because I've so been there. You're right about the titanium-coated soul; I didn't have it either and I was a nervous sobbing wreck.

    Good luck. PM me if you need to vent. I've worked at a couple dozen L.A. clubs so I can sympathize.

  3. #3
    Member Alpaca's Avatar
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    Thank you, Yekhefah. The cyber-hug helps a great deal. I feel a little stronger already.

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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    beh. we all feel your pain. i have a bruise on my neck from today to prove it. so... i litERally feel your pain. (grrrr) yeah... la = not ftw.

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    Featured Member AmazingKat's Avatar
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    "Oh, honey" were the first words in my mind...but I see Yek has already covered them lol. I travel to the Midwest a lot to dance and it is quite different from LA (my home for now) to dance in. I'm not sure I even have the balls to go back to dancing while I'm here in the mean time. I haven't even been brave enough to venture into the valley region of LA yet. Its a different beast. I do hope you find something that works for you though.

    Btw, cats+wine+alpacas= my idea of a sexy time.

  6. #6
    Banned i.breathe.in's Avatar
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    what makes it so bad i have never made it out there? is it just high contact or?

  7. #7
    God/dess
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    Yeah. What's it like out there?

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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    Quote Originally Posted by ColetteCalahan View Post
    beh. we all feel your pain. i have a bruise on my neck from today to prove it. so... i litERally feel your pain. (grrrr) yeah... la = not ftw.
    JFC! A bruise? *continues with evil world dominating plan to cut off certain unwanted states and push them into the ocean* to all the LA girlies.

  9. #9
    Featured Member Corey's Avatar
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    I still work out here. i think it depends where in the Valley or in LA you are dancing. I have mainly worked the topless and/or bikini bars in the valley.

    I haven't had many problems with custies and one of my regs, I've had for over two years and he does not expect anything OTC.

    I find that the custies tend to be working class, for the most part, so unless you have some good regular clientele the $$$ just isn't that great here.

    Also, most clubs in the valley tend to be smaller, with a couple of exceptions. And some of the dancers have been working the circuit for years! I mean like well over ten years or so! Also, there are a ton of clubs all over LA, just check zbone.com. There are so many clubs and dancers and the custies can have their pick.

    This is where the drama comes in! The older circuit dancers and some younger ones have made the mistake of becoming to 'chummy' with the custies. So if a new girl comes around and she's hot and guys like her, there will for sure be dancer drama....in a big way!

    I try to work around this by working in several clubs without schedules and just being polite and not getting too close to anyone. I made the mistake of making 'friends' in my last club in which I was there for three years. (Yek knows, she was there briefly).

    Sorry for threadjack, but this is for the ladies who wanted to know what it was like.
    (Formerly known as 'Korina')

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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    Quote Originally Posted by Zinaida View Post
    Yeah. What's it like out there?
    Judging from the posts by members (not just Yek and Alexxa) who have posted on SW - LA is a nightmare. Thats description is pretty damn close. I'm at least both Yek and Alexxa could take a whole thread telling you horror stories of LA clubs. It seems to me, from an outside perspective, that most LA clubs are places where guys hardly ever tip, grab at anywhere at every chance, where everyone asks/expects for HJ.BJ.FS, where everyday you're most likely to have a pimp approach you....the list goes on.


    for Alpaca..sorry you had to go through that.
    you live like an ivy vine
    you can only survive by clinging onto trees
    that's your flaw
    put down some roots so you can stand on your own
    -Kenpachi



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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    Quote Originally Posted by RoseLeigh View Post
    JFC! A bruise? *continues with evil world dominating plan to cut off certain unwanted states and push them into the ocean* to all the LA girlies.
    yeah, a one of my "i like fake s/m" boys got waaaaay too rough. it's on my NECk, which REALLy makes me mad. By the time I was gonna go back on the floor to charge him extra he had left... next time. eh... hazards of the job? shouldn't f*cking be like that. I get a lot of the freaks.... but wow, the stuff you gotta tolerate, esp. in LA, where touching, grabbing, and everying TM mentioned is really standard... if you don't have the right mentality for it, it can burn you out/really jade you. If I didn't have school and all my awesome riding pals to keep me sane I mighta burned my club down (i KEED) a long time ago, just because it seems so abysmal sometimes. I love the $$ potential when it's THERE, but THAT hasn't even been there for a while... so it's really hard to justify a lot of the stuff. I find that the more evil stuff I heard about going on, the tamer my dances get, esp. if I don't know the guy... ha.

  12. #12
    Member Alpaca's Avatar
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    Thanks for the support everyone, and for sharing your LA tales. I'm sure if I try hard enough I'll be able to find my 'niche' out here, so to speak. Even though more money seems to be in nude/high contact, I might have to find a topless or bikini club like Corey mentioned. My old club was nude with incredibly high mileage, but this was just different. . . The guys I dealt with (at Rouge in Van Nuys) all just had this creepy smug sense of entitlement to more than I wanted to give, and felt because they gave me 40 whole dollars they had the right to grab and try to lick (YUCK) me everywhere even after I repeatedly told them no, then complain I gave bad dances. After awhile, I stopped trying to be evasive about my rules in trying to get dances cause I didn't want to deal with it, and told them right up front what I wouldn't allow.... and of course didn't make any more money. Add to this the fact that the club got raided and a girl got arrested for prostitution, and it was a really stressful first night. On the plus side, many of the girls were very nice and helpful. And I know the good customers are out there, they're just way way way outnumbered, and spread too thin across the many clubs. We should build our own club where we get to interview all customers first.

  13. #13
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    ^^You need to look up tips on keeping guys from licking you. Well, licking you twice-hand sanitzer, lotion, stuff like that on the lickables. Heh. Works though. Unless they don't have taste buds. Seriously, do a search on 'licking' or 'bitter apple'.

  14. #14
    cameron_keys
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    Quote Originally Posted by TigersMilk View Post
    It seems to me, from an outside perspective, that most LA clubs are places where guys hardly ever tip, grab at anywhere at every chance, where everyone asks/expects for HJ.BJ.FS, where everyday you're most likely to have a pimp approach you....the list goes on.

    I empathize with everyone out there.Here in Miami/Ft Laud its exactly the same. It seriously sucks your soul dry.

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    Member Alpaca's Avatar
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    Quote Originally Posted by RoseLeigh View Post
    ^^You need to look up tips on keeping guys from licking you. Well, licking you twice-hand sanitzer, lotion, stuff like that on the lickables. Heh. Works though. Unless they don't have taste buds. Seriously, do a search on 'licking' or 'bitter apple'.
    Like the salves you can get for your pets! Brilliant! Thanks!

  16. #16
    Veteran Member Delilah27's Avatar
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    Yeah L.A. can be pretty vicious, it's very competitive and like another poster said not for the weak. PM me if you want some feedback about clubs around L.A. of if you just need to vent.

  17. #17
    Veteran Member MonicaF's Avatar
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    I'm really sorry you had such a hard time in LA. People in metro/urban areas can be cold as ice - don't look at this as loss though, maybe you'll wind up trying again another time, maybe not. Regardless you've learned something about yourself.

  18. #18
    Banned roxanna's Avatar
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    Ive given up in LA for now. I was at Red Velvet before it got sold, but after not getting hired at rouge or valley ball, I just got really frustrated and took a break. Im cocktailing in woodland hills, just couldnt take it anymore. Might go back to red velvet with the new owner, but we'll see.

  19. #19
    LoveComesFromWithin
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    try the 605 freeway clubs, there a little nicer...

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    Veteran Member Delilah27's Avatar
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    Quote Originally Posted by LoveComesFromWithin View Post
    try the 605 freeway clubs, there a little nicer...
    Industry is just as competitve and known for high mileage...(not trying to bash any industry dancers)

    If you can deal go for it..but it's pretty similar to L.A.

  21. #21
    Member Alpaca's Avatar
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    I very much appreciate all the advice and support. My current solution is to fly back home this weekend and work my tail off at my old club. Not thinking past that yet.

    If worse comes to worst, you only need one kidney, right?

  22. #22
    LoveComesFromWithin
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    i consider industry the 60.
    i was talking about tabbo in arcadia, spicy sante fe springs, imperial pico rivera, holiday sante fe springs

  23. #23
    Featured Member london's Avatar
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    Alpaca,

    Sorry to hear that you were unhappy with the club you picked. What you may want to look into are the amateur nights at various clubs throughout southern California. Always make sure to call ahead so you can verify that the club does them every week and that you can enter the contest.

    That way, if nothing else, you are guaranteed a bit of stage money (and a possible win!), a look around the club and at the clientele, and possibly be offered a job there. Additionally, it may provide a welcome change, knowing that you can leave right after the contest either way or potentially stay on for the night if hired at a club which piques your interest.

    One low-contact bikini club is Cheetah's in Hollywood for low pressure environment and dances done out in the open: so you won't get mauled! Another recently re-opened bikini club is Crazy Girls on Sunset (not sure how/where dances are done or level of contact expected.)

    I have worked at Cheetah's in the past (late fall/winter 2006)and although big money was uncommon, I never had a problem making at least $200/night...There seemed to be a ceiling for higher earnings(which is why I left), perhaps because dances are a tough sell of $25/dance for clothed, non-private air-dances (no grinding allowed). However, they always had the most laid-back clientele and decent stage tipping. Good luck!

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  24. #24
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    Crazy Girls has tanked. The worst managers in the world are running it into the ground.

  25. #25
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    Default Re: I thought I was strong enough for L.A., but....

    I worked in the LA area 3-4 years ago at TJ's and 3-4 other places and it was a constant struggle.

    Now I work in the rural clubs of the Upper Midwest and there is no comparison in the types of customers. These clubs aren't as easy as they were in years past, but the clubs are run more old school with stage tipping, regulated amounts of dancers, and no extras allowed in the club.

    LA metro area guys are rough around the edges, predominately non white, and are full of game. They will be more prone to play the dancer instead of letting the dancer play them. The owners and the customers are faster paced.

    Plus many clubs there have dancers who have "seniority" and stake claim on their own dressing rooms, and dare new girls to fuck with them.

    Most of the clubs that have business are juice bars, which play ridiculously short songs for ouitrageous prices and the club owners due to the lack of a profitable bar gouge the dancers on dance fees and tip outs.

    The guys in the rural Midwest are predominately white, plaid shirt farmer and sportsmen type guys, who are kinda back in time, and lack game. They don't have access to massage parlors, escorts, and tons of clubs with large amounts of hot dancers in them, so more of these kinds of customers latch on to girls who attract them physically and mentally, and can be talked out of money much easier. They are more slow and square, and those are the types of guys more prone to give us money for minimal contact and bs.

    California is a decent place to live for a person who has enough cash flow from their own business to afford a nice house that is centrally located, has great shopping, restaurants, concerts,and night life, but being that it is an area that is old and established in not a good place for someone to start out in anything.

    I'm not saying you can't find a club or two that will hire you where you could do ok, but it will take some work, and the club you find may end up being miles away from where you live.

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