Results 1 to 6 of 6

Thread: Please help if you can!

  1. #1
    Newbie Gia13's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Minne-snow-ta
    Posts
    9
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 1 Post

    Default Please help if you can!

    Hello all!
    I'm brand new to this forum but I am so grateful to have found it. I have already learned a lot just by browsing around the different threads, but I need some advice with something I haven't heard mentioned. If you have had the same type of trouble please let me know! I'll appreciate any feedback I can get.

    I started dancing about a year and a half ago and went on "vacation" 2 months ago. Obviously there were parts of the job that irked me (but what job doesn't have those?), but I loved it. But about two months ago I started getting burnt out with juggling work and school and some personal issues and decided to take some time off. I wasn't sure at the time if it was going to be temporary or for good.

    But here lies the problem. I have been dating my boyfriend for a little over a year now. He treats me very well and has been very supportive of me but had a lot of trouble with me dancing towards the end. Part of the reason I took a break from dancing was for him. He got upset seeing me upset some nights and hearing about the few disrespectful men who would come in.

    But I miss it. I miss dancing so much. I have dreams about it almost every night and when I hear songs I used to dance to I get a little teary-eyed. I miss the rush I got on stage, the interactions with some of the customers, the sisterhood between the girls, and of course, the money. I am torn because I know that I miss dancing but I also know how upset and sad my boyfriend would be if I went back. If you have any similar experiences, advice, or even just comments, please let me know. Thank you so much!

    -Gia

  2. #2
    God/dess papillonluvr's Avatar
    Joined
    Feb 2006
    Location
    japan
    Posts
    3,724
    Thanks
    315
    Thanked 1,186 Times in 703 Posts
    My Mood
    Goofy

    Default Re: Please help if you can!

    So I was in the same situation not too long ago. I dreamed about dancing for a long time while I was preggers and for a while after I had my baby. My husband is not too happy with my dancing but has learned to accept it as part of who I am.
    I told him I was going to dance, and if it really bothered him, as in, if it was a deal breaker and he would leave me, I would of course choose him over dancing. The money has helped. When I payed off my car and put a down payment on our house with money from dancing, he has come to see it as more beneficial than harmful to our relationship.
    talk to your guy about it. Tell him that the money helps and why you like your job so much. Make it clear to here to him that you would always choose him and that dancing is just that to you-a job, nothing more. Show him how much you love him every day and especially on the days you work.
    Good Luck!!
    "You can close your eyes to reality but not to memories -Stainslaw J. Lec

    Confuscius say: "Man who pull bra stap get bust in face"


  3. #3
    Newbie Gia13's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Minne-snow-ta
    Posts
    9
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 1 Post

    Default Re: Please help if you can!

    Thank you so much... that really helps! I appreciate the advice, my dear. I know I need to just sit down with him and tell him how I feel, but I'm a little scared. But I will. I know it's what I need to do.

  4. #4
    Featured Member paintgoddess's Avatar
    Joined
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Atlanta, GA
    Posts
    1,164
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 46 Times in 27 Posts

    Default Re: Please help if you can!

    I think I help my bf's sanity by letting him know that there is a definite expiration date on my dancing career (out by 2009) and that I have clearly defined financial goals (completely out of debt and down-payment on a home). He really doesn't like what I do, but he knows it's work. He hates that I "show my twat" all night at work and gets a bit depressed about it... I really can't make it all better for him, but I think we have a bit of a compromise as I'll be retiring sooner than later for him and moving on to bigger and better things.

    As it's been said, I have also let him know that if it comes down to him or dancing, I'll always choose him. When faced with that choice, the job I love becomes "just a job." I try to be understanding with him and told him the other week that there are army wives... and then there are strip club husbands. It's definitely a sacrifice for the partner.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lysondra View Post
    Strippers are like ninjas. You never know how many there are or if the person next to you is one.
    Quote Originally Posted by Emily View Post
    ...I assume you probably don't want to deal with pervs, and the guys that just don't give a fuck about money are like unicorns...
    Quote Originally Posted by Sinder View Post
    I know I have said it before, and I'll say it again.... THE VAGINA IS NOT A CLOWN CAR!


  5. #5
    God/dess SundayMorning's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2007
    Posts
    3,152
    Thanks
    5
    Thanked 7 Times in 6 Posts

    Default Re: Please help if you can!

    Paintgoddess, that was really well put! Wow!

    I'm not in the same situation at all, Gia13...my husband has never had issues with me dancing, but I think it comes down to the aforementioned things. It's just a job and my loyalty is first and foremost to him. I also see it kind of like acting--sure, it's my body but it isn't ME that these guys are falling in love with; it's my stage persona. It's like reading an erotic story about a celebrity. It isn't really them; it's the author's perception of them which is probably not at all who they are. But regardless, I wanted to share my sympathy and hope that you both find a way to resolve this to your satisfaction.


  6. #6
    Newbie Gia13's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Minne-snow-ta
    Posts
    9
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 1 Post

    Default Re: Please help if you can!

    Thank you again everyone. I appreciate your words of wisdom. Peace, love and happiness from me to you

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •