Not sure if this goes here or hustle hut but basically this is how I'm feeling right now![]()
My club recently started a smoking ban in the club. It's really getting to me at this point because typically I only smoke at work. I get really nervous talking to people and just being around large groups of people so I'll smoke around them and it calms me down. This has worked...but now there's no smoking in the club so I'm fidgity and fumbling on my words!The other night I thought I'd found the cure....drinking an enormous amount of alcohol. Needless to say that didn't end very well. It got me thinking about how dependent I've become on that one shot or a few to help loosen me up and make me social. I don't like being dependent on something like alcohol because I'm paranoid I'll develop a problem (even though I rearely drink outside of work). So my solution was to give up alcohol at work for lent. I figured I'm a strong woman - any amount of anxiety I have I can overcome with my strong will.
Well I think I was wrong.I've been able to drink at work for almost 4 years now and I totally forgot how crazy a saturday night can be when you're sober. I swear I was going to have a heart attack! I wanted to cry by how paniced I felt! I was shy and observant, not participative and rather homicidal when guys tried to bargain with me for a lap dance. This proves even more that a few shots at the beginning of the night have been helping to push me a long. But I don't like this. I want to be able to do it without drinking. Is this possible? Any advice? I'm worried between now and the time Lent is over my money is going to go down drastically if I don't get ahold of myself! What's wrong with me?
Geez I sound crazy don't I? LOL!![]()



The other night I thought I'd found the cure....drinking an enormous amount of alcohol. Needless to say that didn't end very well. It got me thinking about how dependent I've become on that one shot or a few to help loosen me up and make me social. I don't like being dependent on something like alcohol because I'm paranoid I'll develop a problem (even though I rearely drink outside of work). So my solution was to give up alcohol at work for lent. I figured I'm a strong woman - any amount of anxiety I have I can overcome with my strong will.
I've been able to drink at work for almost 4 years now and I totally forgot how crazy a saturday night can be when you're sober. I swear I was going to have a heart attack! I wanted to cry by how paniced I felt! I was shy and observant, not participative and rather homicidal when guys tried to bargain with me for a lap dance. This proves even more that a few shots at the beginning of the night have been helping to push me a long. But I don't like this. I want to be able to do it without drinking. Is this possible? Any advice? I'm worried between now and the time Lent is over my money is going to go down drastically if I don't get ahold of myself! What's wrong with me?
Reply With Quote

Bookmarks