I think I have a mild form of bipolar disorder called cyclothymia.
Within the past 6 month or so, I've gone between moods of what I was calling "laziness" and "productivity", but now that I think a bit more deeply about this, my mood and lifestyle has little to do with sheer laziness.
"The symptoms of cyclothymia are essentially the same as those of bipolar disorder, but they're less severe and the episodes of highs and lows are generally shorter in duration."
"A key feature of hypomania is the presence of at least one of the following:
-Unusually good mood or cheerfulness (euphoria)
-Irritability or angry outbursts
-Inflated self-esteem
-Nearly constant talking
-Driven engagement in work, relationships or hobbies
A key feature of mild to moderate depression in cyclothymia is either:
-Persistent feelings of sadness or, in children, persistent irritability
-Diminished interest or pleasure in all or most activities
-Change in weight
-Difficulty sleeping
-Excessive sleeping
-Loss of energy
-Difficulty concentrating or making decisions"
About a month ago, I was so damn unmotivated that I could barely even get myself into work enough to pay rent. Then, a few weeks after that, I started cleaning all the time, becoming overly talkative, and discussing my grand plans for and understanding of life and how much I had to offer, etc. Looking back, what a weird fucking conversation.
Now, I haven't gotten out of bed all day. I feel lethargic. I barely go to the gym anymore. The thought of work makes me cringe. Or tear up. Or both. A few weeks ago I would have jumped up to go be the perfect sexy being that I am.
I've been irritable with everyone recently, and I either overstudy or can't for the life of me open a text book.
I just got off the phone with my dad (Masters in psych, is schizophrenic/bipolar) and he says that it sounds to him more like Bipolar 1, but I personally think my symptoms are too mild to qualify for that. Either way, I have a psychiatrist recommended and I'll be making an appointment for sometime this week.
Wish me luck!I somehow knew this would happen someday...
I knew I wouldn't be able to escape the damn family curse. Physically, we're hale and hardy ('cept for skin cancer), but mentally my family is all quite damaged.


I somehow knew this would happen someday...
I knew I wouldn't be able to escape the damn family curse. Physically, we're hale and hardy ('cept for skin cancer), but mentally my family is all quite damaged.
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i know exactly what you're going through.


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