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Thread: Best friend rant

  1. #1
    Featured Member la429's Avatar
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    Default Best friend rant

    So my best girlfriend just met this guy who is a total asshole. She just tried breaking up with him and he grabbed her by the neck and threatened to bury her dead body. She didn't tell me this until after the fact and I flipped out because she is still talking to him. I told her that sooner or later this episode would be repeated but God forbid with worse results. She claimed that he was really sorry and promised to never do it again. I stated my feelings about it but didn't want to push it to much because I was afraid she would shut herself off from me and take his side. So the other night she called me all drunk telling me how much she loved him. It took all of my strength to not freak out and yell at her but I told her that I didn't approve of the relatiopnship and do not think he was the one for her. I told her she could do better but I am her friend and will stand behind her decision. So he called me the other night because she told him what a scum bag I think he is and was apologizing to me and saying what a fuck up he is and he regrets everything and would do the right by her blah blah blah..... So when she wants to bring him around me can I just tell her that I think he should die and I don't want to hang out with a woman beater or give him a second chance?

  2. #2
    cameron_keys
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    Default Re: Best friend rant

    I would def say that you dont want him around you or calling you. I've done this before. If time goes by and nothing else happens and you see that it really WAS an isolated incident(which I dont hold much hope for...but since he called you apologizing and not telling you to mind your own business there is a slight hope)then you can re-evaluate. But tell her that until he has proven his worth beyond a shadow of a doubt...you cant be around him.

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    God/dess hockeybobby's Avatar
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    Default Re: Best friend rant

    Why should you compromise your principles for appearance sake? If the man disgusts you and you don't want his company, sure, tell your friend. Make sure you also tell her you care for her and her well being and continue to be supportive. Perhaps suggest a spousal abuse informational type website.
    hb

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    God/dess xdamage's Avatar
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    Default Re: Best friend rant

    Well, a part of me is thinking that some people are drawn to major drama, even abuse, like a moth to a flame, and until they get burned enough, you're wasting your breath trying to make them see it your way. The best you can do then is protect yourself, let them take their beatings/bumps until they grow tired of it, see the folly of it, and make a decision to protect themselves. I know that sounds cynical, but sadly people, even our friends and families, some times choose to self destruct and there is often nothing we can do about it but avoid letting them drag us under too.

  5. #5
    cameron_keys
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    Default Re: Best friend rant

    Also...if he IS a psycho abusive guy and she's telling him things you say about him and giving out your personal info(like your phone number)to him..she isnt to be trusted either. You dont want the abuse to end up on YOUR doorstep, so watch what you say to her.

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    Veteran Member BmiWMT14's Avatar
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    Default Re: Best friend rant

    I would stand By your descision, but let her know that you are there for her. The worst that can happen is months or even years down the road, you might have to eat a little crow, and appologize to him if he proves his worth.
    You Cant Quit until you try, You cant live until you die, You Cant learn to tell the truth until you learn to lie.You Cant Breath Until you choke,You gotta Laugh When your the Joke, Theres Nothing like a funeral to make you feel alive! Will you swear on your life, that no one will cry at my Funeral!
    Quote Originally Posted by cameron_keys View Post
    Yes please save me from this life of debauchery! You can all kneel down and worship at the Church of the Holy Clitoris to convince me!!

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    Veteran Member Ina's Avatar
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    Default Re: Best friend rant

    This is def a very hard situation to be in i'm actually going through the same exact thing with my youngest sister. She is attracted to the most lowlife men she can find. I just don't understand it he treats her like shit. Let me give you guys an example.... on their FIRST date (if you can call it that) they went to a club, well he ended up leaving her there & if that was not a big enough of a slap in the face he took her purse & her cell phone with him and that was their first date!

    She has put up with sooo much crap from this guy but she refuses to see that he is no good for her. It is so hard to just stand there & watch her go through this but she does not want to leave him. So unfortunately all we can do is tell her that we're there for her and hope that she comes to her senses.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

    "It is better to be an open sinner than a false saint"

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    God/dess Bella21's Avatar
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    Default Re: Best friend rant

    Ew, creepy. I would definately tell her not to bring him around me.
    If you think school is hard, try being stupid.

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    Default Re: Best friend rant

    Thats pretty extreme behavior. If I were you I would stick by my principals, and demonstrate to her that that it IS NOT OK, by not having anything to do with him. But let her know you love her and want to spend time with her and will not judge her for her decisions. That if (haha WHEN) somehting else happens she can come to you for help.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

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