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Thread: making friends with girls at work

  1. #1
    ever7
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    Default making friends with girls at work

    is this a conflict of interist?

    do you find that the friendships last, or do you think it is not a good idea?

    should i try to keep it strictly business?

    alot of the girls at the club i just started at seem really nice, plus a bunch are really new.

    what is peoples experience with this in general
    have you met good friends in the biz? lasting friendships?

    one of my good friends is worried that i will make friends with girls who party too much and get in trouble.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    I try to be nice and friendly to the girls I work with, but not actually become friends with them. The ONLY girl I hang out with outside of work is zxcire, and I knew her long before either of us worked at my club. I found out really quick at my last club that too many of the girls seem nice and normal at first, but then drag their stripper friends into their personal drama. No thanks, not for me.

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    Member sexystar's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    Me personally I would say never make friends at work

    Reasons:
    1 they mess up your money like feel like they can come have a conversation w u while your with a customer
    2 if its a slow night instead of working you might sit and talk to them
    3 a lot of strippers have other motives like are pimps have pimps or you might be making more then them and they want to do something to knock you out of the box and get you fired


    Friendships take time anyone trying too hard to be your friend in the beginning believe me they have a motive. I met girls that were in the game for 9 years and they go to the strip club and tell girls omg i just started dancing im so scared just to make a girl feel like they have something in common w them and then they lure them to do what they want

    just be careful use your mind not your heart take your time
    They say money talks...well I'm the ventriloquist!!!!!

    sexystar sexystar sexystar, keep my name out of your mouth hoes its not a dick lmao

  4. #4
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    I met my best friend in the club 4 years ago. We have set boundaries for ourselves when we are at work so we don't sabotage ourselves or each other. It works out pretty well.

    Being friends with girls at work isn't for everyone, though. Do what you're comfortable with.

  5. #5
    Member kisskiss's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    This is a hard question. I work in a small club so it's really hard not to become friends or acquaintances with the girls that work there. I have one girl there that I would call my very good friend. We're both different body types and just have a different look altogether so most guys that like her usually don't like me so there's never a conflict of interest. However, there are girls that I work with that have a similar look as me and that's when things clash. You're suppose to be "friends" with these girls and when one of you gets chosen over the other that's when things get tense. No matter what though there is always going to come a time when money gets in the way of friendships.

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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    I view stripper friendships as mostly club only. As for you, don't bother making friends at first. You are new and possibly gullible to this new job. The longer you are there the easier it will be for you to see who are the party people and who aren't. Then you can see who you may or may not want to be friendly with.
    you live like an ivy vine
    you can only survive by clinging onto trees
    that's your flaw
    put down some roots so you can stand on your own
    -Kenpachi



  7. #7
    Veteran Member Daisa's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    I've always had very few friends at work. When you start befriending all of your co-workers, you start inviting drama. imo
    use myspace? Send me a friend request!!!
    http://www.myspace.com/bella_italia_a


  8. #8
    Member kisskiss's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    Sometimes it's hard NOT to make friends. The girls you work with all have something in common: the job. You're bound to make friends. Unfortunately money will always come in the middle of friendships and that's something you'll have to learn to deal with.

  9. #9
    Veteran Member alessandra's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    I agree with Brendita- I'm usually nice and friendly to the girls I work with, and we get along well at work, but we don't hang out together outside work. Sometimes I'll pair up with girls I get along well with to hustle customers for double dances, or sometimes I'll ride with another girl to work, but that's about the extent of it.
    In my experience, if you get really close with lots of dancers at the club, you will get involved in the bar drama whether you want to be or not

    Just have fun, be smart, and remember you're there to make money for you--not to make a bunch of new friends.

  10. #10
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    my best friends are girls i met at work.

  11. #11
    Featured Member CherryBomb954's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    Just be careful. The ones who I thought were my "Friends" at my old club backstabbed me when I got in trouble for something I didn't do. I expected to have people on my side to help me out but instead they talked shit. Looking back, I realized one of the mistakes I made at my old club was talking too much and making too many "friends" I trusted people and told them things (stupid, stupid, stupid!) all for it to be twisted and thrown back in my face. I learned my lesson.

    Stick to yourself. Be friendly, of course, but don't get too involved in anyone or anything. Stay neutral, and stay out of other people's drama. Don't ever give your opinion. You'd be suprised how one little comment can cause you world of hassle.

    This girl the other night was pissed at another girl, and for some reason she decided to come sit next to me and start talking shit about the situation, then she asked what did I think of it.....I told her I didn't know that I didn't know her or the other girl well enough and politely excused myself. I didn't state my opinion, fuel her fire, or allow myself to be seen sitting with her too long. Later on the when the shit hit the fan between management and the two of them.....so glad I was not involved. Situations like this are breeding grounds for unnecessary drama and even worse...losing your job for something you had nothing to do with.

  12. #12
    Picaresque
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    IMHO it's better for your money to just ignore everyone.

    I have two girls at my club that I like and will hustle with, but I didn't go seeking that. It just happened naturally--we started working a guy together, ended up keeping him in a CR for two hours, and realized we make a good team! But we don't hang on each other all night or talk about personal stuff, we just want to make $$ together when the opportunity for a 2-girl thing comes up.

  13. #13
    AudreyLeigh
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    Ive only made 3 friends at work in the 7 years ive been dancing. Im friendly with the girls and like them but its rare to come across someone who I hang out with outside of work. One was drama rama and didnt last long tho once in a while she calls me out of the blue. One moved to Reno so I only see her when Im working and the other is so busy with her f/t dayjob, dancing 3 days a week and her kids that we have to schedule in time to hang out.

    But for the most part - no to friends from the club unless it just happens naturally.

  14. #14
    God/dess VegasPrincess's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    For me its actually really positive. My old roommate (I need to call her btw) and I used to work together like EVERY single night, and we banked. We would walk around and do a lot of double dances, but if a guy wanted just me or her that was fine too we'd meet up l8r. For me it's really motivating to have a friend at work, it helps make me go to work and it just makes me feel all in all more comfortable knowing that somebody else there is looking out for me.
    Sexy Jasmine after getting fucked over at work:

    God loves strippers and when guys do things like that its an automatic ticket to HELL!


    Quote Originally Posted by anomar View Post
    Perhaps you stopped spending money on her. Strippers need money to operate. They are like coin operated juke-boxes of love.

  15. #15
    cameron_keys
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    I met my closest friends at work.But we are talking about being close friends with 4 or 5 girls out of hundreds and hundreds in almost 8 years. Few and far between. Otherwise...I try to be friendly,but distant. No personal info..that kind of thing.

  16. #16
    God/dess VegasPrincess's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    ^^^^^

    Off topic I been dancing 8 years in May....crazy ... it feels like my first time on stage at the good ol Sugar Shack was like yesterday
    Sexy Jasmine after getting fucked over at work:

    God loves strippers and when guys do things like that its an automatic ticket to HELL!


    Quote Originally Posted by anomar View Post
    Perhaps you stopped spending money on her. Strippers need money to operate. They are like coin operated juke-boxes of love.

  17. #17
    Featured Member Sunshine73's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    I find it best just to keep personal info to yourself...be friendly with the girls, but don't get personally involved with them. I too have trusted in the wrong people at times and blabbed about my personal life when I shouldn't have. Girls can be backstabbing bitches. But whatever. What goes around, comes around...

    I usually keep the chatter about work-related issues.
    Quote Originally Posted by Picaresque View Post
    Maria Callas said it best: "When my critics stop hissing, I shall know I'm slipping."

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    Veteran Member sexysunny's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    stick do doing your own thing for now... you aren't there to make friends. but still be friendly. but you probably will meet some girls and become good friends. try to be friends but distant and don't let it interfere with your work, you just need to know how to keep your distance in work time.
    SEXY SUNNY

  19. #19
    Featured Member Starfire's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    I met one of my best friends at work, but like other girls said it just happened naturally. At first, I would recommend just keeping to yourself-don't be unfriendly, or overly friendly. Sit back and observe what's going on, and maybe you'll want to befriend the other girls, maybe not. But if you keep to yourself first, you can weed out the drama queens you don't want to be associated with.

  20. #20
    Member Divalicious's Avatar
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    Lightbulb Re: making friends with girls at work

    The first thing I learned when doing this job was not to make friends with anyone. That this is a job and too much drama happens when you try to pry. I have heard so many bad stories about this that I decided to steer clear. And besides, what if you and that 'friend' or yours is eyeing the same custy? Do you try for a double? Or do you try to get the custy first? Desicions desicions

  21. #21
    Veteran Member UV69's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    I'm not friends with all the girls at work, but I would have to say I consider many of them (about 1/4 of them) in my main circle of friends and why not I do spend most of my time at work and I have worked in the same club with these girls for years. I have spent more time with many of them then those i went to highschool with or most of my family and definately more then most other who have come and gone in my life.

    I met my female BFF at work and she's the type of friend who would put her hand in the fire for me (I know becuz when she's drunk she tells me this about 100times along with the speech about how much she loves me/but not that way..ect.ect what and how I mean to her). Hell I love her 2 if she wasn't str8(and not realy my type) or I was a guy we would get married cuz day in and out there is very few that gets me that way and I have such a stronge bond with.

    I know alot of other dancers can be competive bitches and haters and do what they can to use, destroy, or fuck u/ur money up. However I stay away from those and have found that I work with some super hott, super down, super cool chicks.

    Ofcourse I'm a lesbian and I do have lovers and whatnot bizzness partners among the girls, but aside from that we have a group(circle of friends) that goes to the gym together, hits denny's or bebes or Space together after work, shops together, goes out together, looks out, and is there for eachother, gives eachother advice... I mean why would you even be on stripper net if you have no interest in bonding with other strippers?? and if so why close the door on it at the club you choice to be at?

    My club is ussually smaller then alot and many of us consider eachother as family. I remember when Unique died and all of us where the 1's cring and we all decided to pay our respects to her. I still cry over it like as if she was my little sister and I have many other friends among the girls I feel as deeply for and truely care about.

    Infact if anything happened where I died 2morrow I know for a fact the 1st people who would miss me and take it the hardest (aside from my mom and my BFF) would be those who I work with, know, and love me.

    i personally love being a stripper and love all my stripper friends. PS none of friends at work have ever affected the money I make at the end of the day --if anything they have help me improve and stay ontop of my game. My circle of friends at my club are the Hulsters and ussually they are the 1's on my back when they see me slack the same way they will be the 1st 1's 2 step up if I needed a place to stay or money or some1 to take care of me cuz something happened and why do I know that cuz overr the years we have been the 1's who have helped eachother out and I have seen it happen within our group that whenever 1 of us falls the other is there to lend on. I personally have moved girls away from abusive boyfriends, picked them up when thier car was on the side of the road, nursed them when some1 slipped something that hit them wronge into thier drink, bought thier children toys for christmas, been at the hospital with them when they needed some1 there for them. i'm not talking superfiscal BS friendships cuz I'm not the type that would just do that for any1. I've done that for my friends who I would expect noless from and I know have been there the same way 100times over 4 me.

    I don't see friendships with coworkers to be short term, problematic, or a conflct of interest. I think it's muvh to your benefit to have as many treu friends in this lifetime that you can make and the only problem is finding them in your life soo if you are blessed enough to find coworkers who you can call friends by all means don't self defent your friendship and shut the door on having those that you have so close in your life for whatever time you spend there. That's how I see it that it's those people I have day in and out in my life I want to be the 1's on my side and there for me becuz if for no other reason they are the 1's with the most potental to effect my life for the better by simply being there 4 me at the right place and the right time.

    Lets say for example you trip and fall and hit yr head/pass out at work. Well who would you want looking out for you. I tell you that if that happened to me I wouldn't even have to worry about it cuz I would be driven home(put into my PJs and bed) after they checked the and asseted damage if nothing was broken or they would take me to the hospital. I would have offers as to who would be there taking care of me or who would front my bills till I made it back (possible from the safe the club keeps) cuz quite simply I have it like that. However if they weren't my friends who knows they would probably just carry my body to the back room call my family and leave the rest up to them unless ofcourse they needed to call 911. Which if the case there was ever that kind of problem in my case till they got there my BFF at work is studying to be a firefighter and would drop everything to make sure I pull threw the way no1 else could as I have been in those shoes there for her soo though she would help any1 else there is noway she'ld let anything happen in my case cuz I know the girl couldn't live w/herself if something she could do could of saved my life and she didn't give it her 110% and knowing that gives me a sense of security in just knowing that which I couldn't even put a pricetag on if I tried.
    "Happiness does not depend on material things, but on having others pay for them"
    "Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition"

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  22. #22
    Featured Member CherryBomb954's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    Quote Originally Posted by Sunshine73 View Post
    I find it best just to keep personal info to yourself...be friendly with the girls, but don't get personally involved with them. I too have trusted in the wrong people at times and blabbed about my personal life when I shouldn't have. .
    I can't even stress this enough. I think it's one of the biggest mistakes made when it comes to these matters.

    Another thing is don't tell anyone how much money you make. Ever. I don't care if you "think you can maybe" trust them. It's hard sometimes when you have one of those really good nights and want to shout it from the rooftops! Trust me though, bad things can come from it.
    I learned my lesson by bragging about a killer night I had once. All of a sudden I had people I never knew before and asking to borrow money. Then guilt tripping me about how their starving kids at home need formula, etc....and how since I made XXX$ that I can afford to fork over 20 bucks and they "swear they'll pay me back" Now I am the biggest bitch in the world because I am not handing over my hard earned money to strangers to feed their kids.
    I also walked in on girls trying to fish money out of my locker vents! Then acted like they thought it was their locker.

  23. #23
    Featured Member saphire123456's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    i think its largely affected by the club environment. Some of you guys may not have experienced this, but there are clubs out there where everyone really is friends, and hangs out outside of work. On the other hand, there are lots of clubs where, its better to keep to yourself, and every night you hold your breath hoping noone steals your shit. If I haven't worked at the 1st example, I wouldn't beleive it either, everyone friends? ridiculous! AWw But I miss going to the diner at 3 in the morning, like 10 -15 of us, and going clubbing, and hitting garage sales afterwards
    These days I like to count my money. I like to wash it delicately and iron it. Sometimes I dry it with some bounty to make it all nice and cuddly. I love my money... did I say that out loud?

  24. #24
    Member pretty's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    friends SOUNDS nice
    but i dont know
    i wouldnt tell them too much
    and just keep busy on the floor instead of in the dressing room
    who cares if they like you?
    youre there to make mint
    not friends
    "i dont mind living in a mans world, as long a s i can be a woman in it"- marilyn monroe

  25. #25
    poca-sita
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    i think its wierd how difficult it is to make friends with other strippers. our club is big, like 70 girls/nite on weekends and in the 3 1/2 years ive been dancing there ive only made friends with 2 girls out of club. id like to make more but it seems like they all arent interested. i try to be nice and all but its like theres some rule against it. why just last week was the first time another girl has ever come over to my house! i guess theres lots of competitivness/jealousy since im such a bankmistress but itd be nice to have more hot friends, and im sure my husband would like it to, wink, wink. also i guess its cause dallas is huge and spread out so i never see any other girls out and about. wierd, us strippers, eh?

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