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Thread: making friends with girls at work

  1. #26
    Featured Member noelle's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    When I first started I really kept to myself because I was so shy and some of the day shift girls were drama... but eventually I made friends and I always felt it motivated me to go to work and added to the fun like VegasPrincess said. Sometimes I'd get distracted and waste time that I should have been hustling just talking to my friends, though.

    So it really depends on what works best for you. For me, I think I'd rather have friends at the club but still be reserved and not try to befriend everyone. That what I can maximize the time I spend actually working

  2. #27
    Veteran Member Alia_of_the_Knife's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    Quote Originally Posted by TigersMilk View Post
    I view stripper friendships as mostly club only. As for you, don't bother making friends at first. You are new and possibly gullible to this new job. The longer you are there the easier it will be for you to see who are the party people and who aren't. Then you can see who you may or may not want to be friendly with.
    I pretty much agree with the above posters. A friendship can happen but for the most part I try to stick to myself. I am "friendly" at work but I am not trying to find people to hang out OTC with.

    You especially have to be careful as a newbie. A lot of the seasoned dancers may try to take her "under her wing" but don't fall for it. Most of the time they are just trying to use you.

  3. #28
    Veteran Member tennisqt's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    Alia_of_the_Knife---use you for what?
    "Maybe some women aren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they're supposed to run wild until they find someone, just as wild, to run with." -Sex and the City

  4. #29
    God/dess Dottie Rebel's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    Work is strictly business. A few times I have made the mistake of mixing friendship and work and I am reminded bitterly.

  5. #30
    God/dess Corgan's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    be careful who you trust, sugar.

  6. #31
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    Quote Originally Posted by Picaresque View Post
    IMHO it's better for your money to just ignore everyone.

    Agreed. I go to work to make money, NOT friends... although I do try to be friendly and cordial, because that's just how I am. Other than that.... LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!



  7. #32
    Featured Member sexy_celeste's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    Quote Originally Posted by CherryBomb954 View Post
    Just be careful. The ones who I thought were my "Friends" at my old club backstabbed me when I got in trouble for something I didn't do. I expected to have people on my side to help me out but instead they talked shit. Looking back, I realized one of the mistakes I made at my old club was talking too much and making too many "friends" I trusted people and told them things (stupid, stupid, stupid!) all for it to be twisted and thrown back in my face. I learned my lesson.
    The same happened to me, and I nearly went to gaol cos of backstabbing friends.

    Used all my stripping savings on lawyers, so it was one expensive lesson!
    Theres no sense crying over every mistake,
    you just keep on trying till you run out of cake

  8. #33
    Veteran Member Alia_of_the_Knife's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    Quote Originally Posted by tennisqt View Post
    Alia_of_the_Knife---use you for what?
    It could be a variety of things. They might use you to get back at other girls at work or use you for transportation since they have a suspended liscense or no car. They might expect to use all your sh!t instead of the housemom or just bringing their own. They might want to borrow and exchange outfits. Or they'll claim that they should be able to get at least one dance or at least tips from a guy who is getting multiple dances from you. They feel that you should be obligated to them for taking you under their wing. If you cross the line and try to establish boundries with them they think you're a bitch.

    It's pretty much a manipulation technique. This one girl was really sweet to me and I saw that she was an awesome dancer. I talked to her and she was very charming. We did double dances and she wanted a ride back to her "place". I ended up being her regular freggin taxi driver and later I learned she as actually homeless. (All the money she earned went to coke and her no good boyfriend.) I started making more money than her and she got jealous like hell. She ended up getting pregnant and moving down south with her boyfriend. I'm glad nothing dangerous happened to me by being involved with her.

  9. #34
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    I only have one friend at work because she is the only one that doesn't do drugs and get in drama, we typically make the most money and so we both get a lot of jealous girl drama because of that. It's nice to have her because I would have quite several times and vice versa. I am and will always be nice to all of the girls at work but she is the only girl I will hang out with outside of work. XOXO

  10. #35
    Featured Member la429's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    To me this is a double edged sword. If you make friends at work you will spend more time in the dressing room "hanging out" or involved in every one's drama. If you don't make friends dancers might talk about you constantly because no one really knows you but you won't be wasting your time in the back.

  11. #36
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    Girls at work r the people i can relate to the most in my life and the ones i stay the furthest away from...

  12. #37
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    ^^Haha makes sense.

    I'm usually the girl that everybody likes lol. Only at one club did I have a serious close friend, we still chit chat. Never hurt business too much(we talked a lot lol), helped it now and then(double-teaming occasionally).

    Some girls I try to keep far far away from. The dramatic ones that'll try and suck you in.

  13. #38
    Senior Member Desiree's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    I'm really nice to everyone at work, we are all friendly (for the most part) and have a ton of fun together. It really pays to have "friends" at work because a lot of times when someone is doing a CR and need a girl for the friend, I'm the first one they grab. Its good to be liked by the girls, but I definitely don't trust any of them. Girls in our line of business are often unstable, drug addicts or at the very least addicted to drama. There are very few girls I would hang out with outside of work. And I don't think theres a single one I would have over to my house. But most of the girls at work are my buddies. I have some of their numbers, sometimes we go out after work or whatever, but I don't consider them true friends and I ALWAYS stay away from drama and NEVER talk shit or take sides with anyone.
    Quote Originally Posted by sxybrat07 View Post
    Guys just don't know how to give a compliment, and they'll focus on whatever they can focus on first, typically tits or ass, and then shit starts spewing out of their mouth.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  14. #39
    AudreyLeigh
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    Quote Originally Posted by AudreyLeigh View Post
    Ive only made 3 friends at work in the 7 years ive been dancing. Im friendly with the girls and like them but its rare to come across someone who I hang out with outside of work. One was drama rama and didnt last long tho once in a while she calls me out of the blue. One moved to Reno so I only see her when Im working and the other is so busy with her f/t dayjob, dancing 3 days a week and her kids that we have to schedule in time to hang out.

    But for the most part - no to friends from the club unless it just happens naturally.
    This girl I was talking about - I saw her last night - first timein 2 years... and shes cleaned up her act, gotten married and had a baby. Were getting together later this week.

    I also went into my other club last week and saw girls from there and realized yea, they really are my friends.

    So I guess I have to change my perspective on friends at work.

  15. #40
    TheSexKitten
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    The only chix I hang with outside of my club at work are Lizzybethers and PuertoRicanPinup, and the girls from work they hang out with outside of work.

    Hmm, it seems like SW is the gratest common denominator!

    Yeah but I'm kind of scared of girls in general anyway, they make me nervous. It takes a lot for me to feel trusting enough to open up and start a relationship with someone, esp. in our kind of cutthroat working environment. However, I'm "friendly" with a handful of girls at my club.

  16. #41
    Senior Member Indira's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    I worked in a small club where the girlsl were a pretty close knit bunch. It was cool at times and major drama other times. It's kind of like falling in love sometimes you can't help it. Working with girls friendships are bound to develop. Just be very carefull, use your best judge of character. I have a few friends from my yrs of dancing and one best friend. We have been best friends for 12 yrs. We talk everyday, go out, been on vacation together, etc.

    IMO it can be cool to be friends with another stripper.
    For instance..I can tell her "remember when that fucking bitch was giving a guy head in the corner" or "remember that time that the DJ came in the dressing room and whipped his dick out, that was so funny" or "that guy over there wants me to spank him with a hairbrush that he brought in" (all true BTW)
    There is NO way I could talk that way with my non stripper friends. They would not understand.

    For the most part we worked well together, but from time to time little problems cropped up but we sorted them out and moved on.

  17. #42
    Featured Member xoxoGracexoxo's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    Quote Originally Posted by shift_6x View Post
    Girls at work r the people i can relate to the most in my life and the ones i stay the furthest away from...

    So true. And the girls I would consider being real-life friends with are the ones I never really get to know -- because they come in, do their job without drama, and go home.

    So many good answers in this thread. I agree, be friendLY, but not friends with girls, at least at first. Don't give out personal information, don't talk about your co-workers with anyone (other dancers, management, customers), and don't spend too much time in the dressing room. Do smile, remember people's names and say hi, and always be courteous. If you are totally unfriendly, you may get a reputation for being a bitch. Not the end of the world, but there are a million little ways that your co-workers can make life easier for you if they like you, and harder for you if they don't.

    As for real friendship, take it much, much slower than you might in the real world. There are two or three girls from work that I've hung out with outside the club. In all cases, it was months (or years) before both of us trusted the other enough...it's a high bullshit environment. It takes a while to sort out what's real from what's not.

  18. #43
    Veteran Member ellebelle's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    My five closest friends I've all worked with. But they were friendships that happened over months or years. Not those instant club-friendships some girls have..

    I've been burned more times than I've been blessed. Let's face it, most strippers are fucked up. It's not a stereotype. The normal ones are in the minority.

    (I'm not even saying I'm normal, but I try to hang around the normal ones to level me out, hah)
    The world's most uncoordinated stripper

  19. #44
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    I'm sure its been said already but i don't have the attention span to read everyones posts thoroughly enough but........

    I try not to make friends at work but believe me I try even harder not to make enemies.

  20. #45
    AudreyLeigh
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    Quote Originally Posted by Alia_of_the_Knife View Post
    I pretty much agree with the above posters. A friendship can happen but for the most part I try to stick to myself. I am "friendly" at work but I am not trying to find people to hang out OTC with.

    You especially have to be careful as a newbie. A lot of the seasoned dancers may try to take her "under her wing" but don't fall for it. Most of the time they are just trying to use you.
    Gosh - I am one of those veterans who will take a girl "under my wing". I made a very good friend that way. The one dancer who I really hang out with a lot.

  21. #46
    Veteran Member winterrose's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    Quote Originally Posted by saphire123456 View Post
    i think its largely affected by the club environment. Some of you guys may not have experienced this, but there are clubs out there where everyone really is friends, and hangs out outside of work. On the other hand, there are lots of clubs where, its better to keep to yourself, and every night you hold your breath hoping noone steals your shit. If I haven't worked at the 1st example, I wouldn't believe it either, everyone friends? ridiculous! AWw But I miss going to the diner at 3 in the morning, like 10 -15 of us, and going clubbing, and hitting garage sales afterwards
    this sums up a lot of us here in MS, we even hang with the girls from the other clubs. Like one big sorority sometimes. But then this is mostly the girls that have been around a while.
    My best friend and I trade babysitting off for each other, so the other one can work.
    A lot of non stripper women don't really want to be friends with you once they know what you do for a living....too scared you might want their man.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    "I'm gonna have a drink and walk around, I got a lot to think about, oh yeah"---Concrete Blonde

  22. #47
    Member MysteriousMystery's Avatar
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    Default Re: making friends with girls at work

    Quote Originally Posted by Brendita View Post
    I found out really quick at my last club that too many of the girls seem nice and normal at first, but then drag their stripper friends into their personal drama. No thanks, not for me.
    yah.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]SexxyBrasil


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