Well, actually, they TEACH you how. Check out the success stories!
Esp. as I am filipino, I am mad amused.
Well, actually, they TEACH you how. Check out the success stories!
Esp. as I am filipino, I am mad amused.
I would just settle for a girl who is friggin nice these days. She doesn't have to be submissive, just part of the team!





What's that saying? Like attracts . . .
So this is real?





Can you have two?![]()
They could just go to Asia themselves instead of paying for this middleman seminar shit. The girls there love foreigners and many are dying to get an American husband who can take care of them.
I somehow never feel much sympathy for these guys when their mail-order brides leave them a year later in their car after clearing out the entire bank account...
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]




I always found this to be an interesting subject... Although the only person I "know" who did it was a widower with a kid, and I'm pretty sure it had little to do with sex or anything of that nature...




Here in China I keep meeting and encountering this Western husband / Chinese wife combo. At first I thought it was a little weird (especially since I haven't seen any the other way round) but then I thought about it and realized how much sense it makes.
What it comes down to, I think, is that both parties in the relationship are staying on top of their gender politics game.
Western gender roles have shifted really fast... to the point that some people adhere to them somewhat and others just don't. Asian gender roles are at a different stage in that shift... Women here are still more traditionally gendered, but less than they were ten or twenty years ago, and since the men are slower to change on both sides of the Pacific, the average American guy's idea and the average Chinese woman's idea of a good marriage are going to be pretty well-matched at this point in time.
*(as have men worldwide when push comes to shove: it's nothing personal, I think; having an oversized pie wedge on the power pie chart re-portioned to half and half means you're losing some pie that you thought was yours, and no one likes that.)



This whole thread reminds of the the Oliver Stone 1993 movie, Heaven and Earth", with Tommy Lee Jones and Joan Chen. Even though its about a Vietnamese women and not Chinese. I Love Joan Chen.
I can't imagine how difficult it would be to assimilate into a whole new culture the way Joan Chens' character does.
GREAT movie by the way!! I highly recommend it. The BEST scene is when she walks into an american supermarket for the first time.





I have two friends that took a deliberate decision to go to Thailand and find Thai girls to marry.
They both wanted mildly submissive girls who'd stay at home/look after the house, etc.
And before I get flayed to death, I'd have to say that both sides seem quite happy with the arrangement - one pair having already had a kid.
I guess it's partially cultural - my friends wanted (2nd) wives with the "keep-the-house wife's" mindset of 30 - 40 years ago, and Thai girls are still brought up in that tradition, so both sides had the same expectation.
It's also a way of escaping from poverty over there - the two Thai girls have a far more confortable life style over here than when they were in Thailand.
Not saying it'll suit everyone, but I thought I'd give the other side of the picture as well.
Phil.
I recently watched a documentary on Thai brides. A foreign white husband is a huge status symbol to them, they don't go for Thai men because they are poor. These women use the internet and dating services to make their dreams come true, marry and perhaps purchase a house in their home country. That way, many people can see that they've come up. White men in Thailand and many Asian countries are treated like kings. But these girls are smart, they know what they're doing.
I've known a couple of guys who have done/are doing this and often things work out for a few years before a woman realizes how many opprotunities and entitlements she has here and gets rid of him. Often having a kid solidifies getting child support/alimony before going all weird a few years later. Most of them don't stay "submissive" for long.
If you had said they have been married for 10+ years that would be something. The whole "honey moon" period doesn't equal "happily ever after". From my understanding foreign brides/american husbands have a HIGHER divorce rate than average.
I know several Russian girls who have done this. All of them are divorced, and were able to stay in the US. Except for one girl.......her husband cutoff communication between me and her. It was really sad, and I think of her often. I am not worried about her safety, just about her happiness.
"Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
"And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion
Originally Posted by Mia M
My step-mom is a Russian mail-order bride!
My dad's divorce from my mom was his third divorce. Along the lines of what thechaosfairy was alluding to, he is extremely traditional in his thoughts of male and female roles in and out of the home. He chose to look for a European woman so he could find someone closer to his own ideals and values.
They were extremely succesful! Eight (maybe nine) years later they are madly in love, and have a great home environment. My dad adopted her daughter, and Diana (my little sis) is doing marvelously in the states.
Just thought I'd throw my two cents in.




In my stint here I've encountered some who are clearly trying to take advantage, and others who are in a mutually beneficial situation.
The big thing is respect. There has to be respect on both sides if anything is to last, if anything is to succeed...
And... as a sometime BDSMer with some friends who are full-time... this is just as important, perhaps even more so, in a situation where one party is submissive to the other. Whether we are talking housewives or collared cabana boys. =)
My neighbor Mila was Filipino and Stan met her through one of those marriage arranging websites. Hes in his 70s and shes in her 30s. They take two 3 month vacations a year to the Philippines. He bought her family a home there sends them money and everything seems good. Theyve been together 8-9? years now....
Theres someone for everyone.
well said chaosfairy




At the seminar South Sea Connections will have you chatting on line and viewing actual Asian women who could turn out to be interested in you!
hahahehe
Yup. I do think it's naive and smacks of exoticism, not to say racism, to assume that an Asian Woman is going to be inherently "Caring, Loving, and Non-materialistic" by virtue of being Asian. An enterprise like this is bound to attract some nice girls looking for better opportunities and some out-and-out gold-diggers, and everything in between.
But yeah, someone from a more traditional culture MIGHT have more traditional expectations about marriage and shared expectations are a big part of marriage. I'm sure it works some of the time. I'd be really curious to know what the divorce rates are for arrangements like this.
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