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Thread: Sex is boring

  1. #1
    AudreyLeigh
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    Default Sex is boring

    Yea, it is. Its gotten monotonous. Boring. Lame. Its like hell be all "lets have sex" and Im like "ok, I guess" and then like 10 minutes later were back to watching Judge Judy. Uh huh. Pretty pathetic.

    Any ideas to spice up the sexiness in my home? Now that my parents have moved out I want to do something special for him...

  2. #2
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    Isn't this the same husband you regretted marrying and considered leaving after your miscarriage? Maybe the spark just isn't there. If there's no chemistry or spark at all, I don't think that can really be fixed.

  3. #3
    God/dess hockeybobby's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    How about trying some role playing? What turns you on, what turns him on? What would you like a handsome stranger to do with you?

  4. #4
    AudreyLeigh
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    Yea, thats him... I know... no spark - thats exactly it. We used to have great sessions that would last hours and wed be so exhausted and now its just - lame. I miss the old times....

  5. #5
    AudreyLeigh
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    Quote Originally Posted by hockeybobby View Post
    How about trying some role playing? What turns you on, what turns him on? What would you like a handsome stranger to do with you?
    I like rough rough stuff - like hold me down and "rape me" (not for real tho) . I knnow Im freakin twisted but we do that and its still not fun like it used to be - unless im wasted... this is bad.

  6. #6
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    I think if you really want to bring the spark back, you can't do that with sex. There has to be chemistry first for the sex to be any good later. If I were you I'd forget about the sex and focus on falling in love with him again. Get out of the house, turn off Judge Judy and go do something fun together that you haven't done in awhile. Make each other laugh. It was good when you were dating, so start dating again. If you can rekindle the relationship, the sex will take care of itself.

  7. #7
    AudreyLeigh
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    ^^^ And this is why I put you on the list of "Most Inspirational SWers"

  8. #8
    Veteran Member Nini Nieb's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    Quote Originally Posted by AudreyLeigh View Post
    I like rough rough stuff - like hold me down and "rape me" (not for real tho) . I knnow Im freakin twisted but we do that and its still not fun like it used to be - unless im wasted... this is bad.
    I like that stuff too. Not all the times but quite often. I think it is pretty normal. Many me girlfriends like it too.

    About being bored with sex ... I know of that too. My expirering/date is usually six month depending on frecuency. It's like the magic of sex is blowing in the wind. Like there is no challenging/adventure

    I really have no urge to fool around either. Weird !?

  9. #9
    God/dess hockeybobby's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    Would it be out of line to suggest a fuck-buddy? Of course, you would have to have a discussion with husby first...I'm not suggesting something hidden or deceitful.

  10. #10
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    Quote Originally Posted by AudreyLeigh View Post
    ^^^ And this is why I put you on the list of "Most Inspirational SWers"
    Aw. Thanks, I hope "dating" works and you get that flame burning again!

  11. #11
    Senior Member juggernutz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    Quote Originally Posted by hockeybobby View Post
    Would it be out of line to suggest a fuck-buddy? Of course, you would have to have a discussion with husby first...I'm not suggesting something hidden or deceitful.
    HB, I do not think Audrey Leigh is just looking for good sex but wants good sex with her husband.

    I agree with Yekhefah, save the relationship, save the sex.
    "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." - Dr. Seuss

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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    Quote Originally Posted by AudreyLeigh View Post
    I like rough rough stuff - like hold me down and "rape me" (not for real tho) . I knnow Im freakin twisted but we do that and its still not fun like it used to be - unless im wasted... this is bad.
    Whoa. This is me exactly, from the rough stuff to the wasted.

    Not having a genuine spark is obviously of concern, but medications could also have to do with it. Have you started anything new? If you're drive isn't affected then I suppose working on your relationship is whats needed. I'm just throwing the obvious out there because it would suck to take the long hard way around this issue if it could easily be fixed with a change in RX.

    HIH

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    Featured Member Sunshine73's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    Yes. And after you rekindle things, maybe bring some lube and toys and fun into the mix. Vibrating cock rings, vibrators...handcuffs, porn DVDs...dress up for him, etc. Sometimes C and I do all the above, and sometimes it's "just us" w/ no dress-up, toys, etc. We have our favorite positions, but it seems like every time we do it, it's different. We've been together for almost 3 years & sex is always a blast. Then again, we have a connection like no other and as Yek said, you have to have the connection down before the sex can get any better.
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  14. #14
    Senior Member curvycutie817's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    Quote Originally Posted by AudreyLeigh View Post
    I like rough rough stuff - like hold me down and "rape me" (not for real tho) . I knnow Im freakin twisted but we do that and its still not fun like it used to be - unless im wasted... this is bad.
    OMG I AM A HUGE FAN OF THE "RAPE" ROLEPLAYING!!!! SO FUCKIN HOT LOL...
    "LIVE FAST DIE PRETTY!!!"

  15. #15
    Veteran Member Nini Nieb's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    A good idea may be you have a special day !? Just you and him ... Doesn't have to be something that special ... A walk or picnic in the wood ... A drink in a cafe with oceanview ?! Him taking you out to dinner ... Taking a trip to a nearby museum ... Actually that can be fun ...

    But who am I to give advices ??

    PS I also like it when he is taking me from behind - he is slapping my ass. Only somewhat hard ... Just to give me a remainder of who is the boss

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    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    unfortunately i think that sex with the same person just gets boring. this has happened in every relationship i have been in. it just gets monotonus. role playing can help as u can pretend its not the same monotonus shit.
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  17. #17
    AudreyLeigh
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    Quote Originally Posted by Nini Nieb View Post

    PS I also like it when he is taking me from behind - he is slapping my ass. Only somewhat hard ... Just to give me a remainder of who is the boss
    That made me lol.. think it was the smilies...

    Well, we used to go to Tahoe a lot - a fun weekend getaway, we never do those weekends anymore. But last night he mentioned going away for a long weekend to in May like Ive wanted to do for months now. I think a small house on the sea for 4 days will be a nice start.

  18. #18
    Featured Member Ava Jadore's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    ^ I think a weekend getaway is a great idea if you can do it! It always steams things up for me! I LOVES me some vacation sex !
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  19. #19
    TheSexKitten
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    Quote Originally Posted by curvycutie817 View Post
    OMG I AM A HUGE FAN OF THE "RAPE" ROLEPLAYING!!!! SO FUCKIN HOT LOL...
    yupyupyup!

    Maybe go somewhere you guys don't usually go, meet up at a bar you've arrived at separately, and have him "take you home" and then have his way with you against your will.

    That sounds pretty hot and I got the idea from someone else on SW.

    Change of scenery always helps!

  20. #20
    AudreyLeigh
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    ^^ probably me lol. i used to do that with my ex all the time....

  21. #21
    Banned jasmine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    I really do think most marriages go through these phases. Mine has, then a few months later we are back to being really hot. Are either of you under a huge amount of stress? That was our big sex killer. It does seem a little early for a regular downswing though, so maybe it is the lack of connection as Yek said.

    If that is the case, you could always try massage. There is nothing sexier than rubbing all over your guy to make you feel close and sexy at the same time, and it can encourage some kink. If you use oil there are all sorts of possibilities.

  22. #22
    TheSexKitten
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    Quote Originally Posted by AudreyLeigh View Post
    ^^ probably me lol. i used to do that with my ex all the time....
    D'oh!

  23. #23
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    Quote Originally Posted by jasmine View Post
    If that is the case, you could always try massage. There is nothing sexier than rubbing all over your guy to make you feel close and sexy at the same time, and it can encourage some kink. If you use oil there are all sorts of possibilities.
    Ooh yeah. K and I like the massage bars from Lush, and every weekend or so we stretch out and just massage each other with a Lush bar. Sometimes it leads to sex and usually it doesn't, we just cuddle and sleep, but it's so nice and we have great sex in the morning afterward!

  24. #24
    Banned jasmine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    ^^ Massage with no sex! You blasphemer!

    If I'm getting the massage I can go to sleep without sex, but if I'm the one rubbing all over the hubby, there is no way in hell he is going to sleep without sex!

  25. #25
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Sex is boring

    LOL... we usually expect sex, but we give each other pretty good deep massages and afterward we're just too damn sleepy for all that work! We tend to be morning-sex people anyway.

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