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Thread: I'm really horny

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    Featured Member la429's Avatar
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    Default I'm really horny

    It's been four months now and we still haven't had sex. I don't really understand what's going on. Some of it was me.. I switched birth control pills and spotted for a while. Mainly though he's always tired or has some dumb ass excuse. He won't touch me when I bleed .. even if it's a little tiny drop and then he wants to wait a COUPLE of days after. We have sat down and talked about this problem. I told him that I need to have sex. He said he was/is under a lot of pressure and understands and will change. He even talked to his Father about it! Still no sex. I offer blow jobs and hand jobs because I'm like I have to keep my man happy. He says no to that. He says he feels bad to make me do something if he's not satisfying me. We fight all the time about this. All I need is for him to fuck me.. maybe not every day but at least 3 times a week. AT LEAST. So I brought up the open relationship thing. If you don't have time to take care of my needs can I seek out someone who will? I know this might sound selfish but sex is like water. I'M FUCKING THIRTSY.. oh yeah and I'm getting angry. I tell him it's just sex. I still love him but I need to be treated like a WOMAN. To be touched and kissed and everything else. He flat out refuses and tells me he will fuck me but guess what I'm still playing with myself. I don't think he is cheating on me. Besides the no sex thing there are no other "signs" but I'm at the edge ladies. I almost feel like going out and finding a new lover but I don't want to cheat. I just don't understand.

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    God/dess Dottie Rebel's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm really horny

    Word, sister. Word up. I'm interested to see if you get any advice...

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    God/dess TheTempest's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm really horny

    I'd like to offer some advice but I'm pretty sure after four months you've tried everything. Jumping on him, sexy lingerie, long talks to increase intimacy. Maybe he feels pressured to perform? I know when my ex used to ask me for sex it was a turn off. Although, he would whine, huff and flip out if I said "no" so that was more the turn off than the actual asking. I'm pretty sure you're not doing that. You seem really concerned about the situation and frustrated.

    Has anything changed recently in either of your lives, besides the B.C. you were on? New job? Impending loan payments?

    Sorry that you're going through this. It sucks.

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    Default Re: I'm really horny

    I think its time to let go babe. If you're like me, sex is an important part of a relationship. If your needs aren't being met within the relationship, and you aren't in an open relationship, you sexual needs are being neglected. It seems to me that you've let him know that he's neglecting you, and that he doesn't care enough to fix the problem. I think you need to have one last talk with him and let him know that either he needs to step it up sexually, let you look elsewhere for sexual fulfillment, or break it off, so you can find someone(s) who will fulfill you.

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    Default Re: I'm really horny

    It sounds like you've basically become roommates, but without the option to fulfill your sexual needs. Getting out on your own, and sharing an apartment with a roommate while being single might be a better all around option for you.

    It's hard to let go of the familiar, even after it has deteriorated greatly from what you originally had. From here on out, I suspect things will continue to deteriorate as your frustration builds. The value of the relationship to both of you diminishes as you close off from each other, and carry on without the intimacy.

    You are in a prison. Start planning your escape. It's a little scary, but it would be a bold, empowering move for you.

  6. #6
    ajbaer
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    Default Re: I'm really horny

    I agree with all above stated.
    E and I went through this for a very short time. He started a new job and had a lot of stress though. It was a couple months but all smoothed out and things are a ok. Now I feel like I'm the one behaving this way. It's just one thing after another, and I feel so tired and cold all the time it's hard. I wanna have sexerz too, sometimes my moods just not right
    Maybe he is depressed, or has an emotional thing he doesn't feel comfortable sharing?
    If it's been drawn out and spoken about though, I say move on. May be the hardest thing you've ever done, and it may hurt...but in time you might find it was the right choice.
    Whatever decision you make, we support you

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    God/dess SundayMorning's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm really horny

    Yeah, at my worst--most stressed because of job, low libido from BC, etc--I STILL managed to have sex at least once a month with the Hubby. This is a horrible situation to be in because any of a million things could be killing his sex drive. Have you tried seeing a couples' counselor? Maybe discussing options and solutions with an impartial 3rd party could help him get it straightened out.


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    Veteran Member Nini Nieb's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm really horny

    Quote Originally Posted by la429 View Post
    It's been four months now and we still haven't had sex. I don't really understand what's going on. Some of it was me.. I switched birth control pills and spotted for a while. Mainly though he's always tired or has some dumb ass excuse. He won't touch me when I bleed .. even if it's a little tiny drop and then he wants to wait a COUPLE of days after. We have sat down and talked about this problem. I told him that I need to have sex. He said he was/is under a lot of pressure and understands and will change. He even talked to his Father about it! Still no sex. I offer blow jobs and hand jobs because I'm like I have to keep my man happy. He says no to that. He says he feels bad to make me do something if he's not satisfying me. We fight all the time about this. All I need is for him to fuck me.. maybe not every day but at least 3 times a week. AT LEAST. So I brought up the open relationship thing. If you don't have time to take care of my needs can I seek out someone who will? I know this might sound selfish but sex is like water. I'M FUCKING THIRTSY.. oh yeah and I'm getting angry. I tell him it's just sex. I still love him but I need to be treated like a WOMAN. To be touched and kissed and everything else. He flat out refuses and tells me he will fuck me but guess what I'm still playing with myself. I don't think he is cheating on me. Besides the no sex thing there are no other "signs" but I'm at the edge ladies. I almost feel like going out and finding a new lover but I don't want to cheat. I just don't understand.
    I'm no way an expert or the one to give advices.

    All I know is ... if my BF wasn't constantly - 24/7 or close - was all over me - asking/begging/commanding for HJ/BJ/sex I would be very disappointed and frustrated. That's the dynamics in my book !! Being manly is a dirty job. Somebody has to do it !! It better be him or else ... Somebody else will do it

    He only can have sex if you also get satisfied ... Give me a break

    Something is wrong here !?!

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    Senior Member muhuwahaha's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm really horny

    first agree to have an open relationship with him

    after that's done contact me.

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    Curious Guest gameboy_kiev's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm really horny

    Quote Originally Posted by hockeybobby View Post

    You are in a prison. Start planning your escape. It's a little scary, but it would be a bold, empowering move for you.
    +100

    absolutely agree...

    If a man can't satisfy woman for so long period of time, he is a criminal.

    Don't get this in wrong way but that you say that you still loves him, it sounds very desperate of you.

    Rise up your standarts... You deserve much much more then that...

    Are you?

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    God/dess VegasPrincess's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm really horny

    Yeah, no doubt it's time to get the fuck out. Any rational person would realize that he should give it up once in a while even if he's not in the mood. And if he just wanted not to fuck, he could at least go down on you....what's the excuse for not doing that??

    And as for the bleeding paranoia, I mean, please. If its just a little bit whats the big deal it washes off. I don't see how that any more gross than what guys "leave behind" after sex if you catch my drift.
    Sexy Jasmine after getting fucked over at work:

    God loves strippers and when guys do things like that its an automatic ticket to HELL!


    Quote Originally Posted by anomar View Post
    Perhaps you stopped spending money on her. Strippers need money to operate. They are like coin operated juke-boxes of love.

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    Default Re: I'm really horny

    Quote Originally Posted by la429 View Post
    It's been four months now and we still haven't had sex. I don't really understand what's going on.
    Some form of temporary impotence? If your SO isn't firing on all cylinders, he may feel embarrassed to discuss it with you.

    And forgetting the sex for the moment, is he displaying general affection towards you, or are you just sharing a room (and a life)?

    Phil.

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    Featured Member la429's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm really horny

    Well thanks for all the advice Ladies and Gents! You all gave me A LOT to think about it.

    Has anything changed recently in either of your lives, besides the B.C. you were on? New job? Impending loan payments?
    Yes he is working at a really shitty low paying job right now and in process of buying his own store. We have been having these problems before the bad job and the store though. Maybe these new circumstances just have made it worse.

    It sounds like you've basically become roommates, but without the option to fulfill your sexual needs. Getting out on your own, and sharing an apartment with a roommate while being single might be a better all around option for you.
    HAHA it's funny you say that because when I am being a bitch that's what I say. I go around and call him "roomie."

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    God/dess TheTempest's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm really horny

    Quote Originally Posted by la429 View Post
    Well thanks for all the advice Ladies and Gents! You all gave me A LOT to think about it.


    Yes he is working at a really shitty low paying job right now and in process of buying his own store. We have been having these problems before the bad job and the store though. Maybe these new circumstances just have made it worse.


    HAHA it's funny you say that because when I am being a bitch that's what I say. I go around and call him "roomie."
    How long have you guys been together?

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