I've been described by many men as the ideal woman. I used to be flattered by this, but then I realized that it makes me a doormat and attracts lazy, complacent guys who think that I'm zero maintenance and that they can do whatever they please because I'm just so "cool."
I'm not jealous. I like many traditionally male things like computers and video games. I'd never drag a guy along shopping with me. I don't demand expensive gifts or even flowers. I'm fun, smart, good conversation, and have eclectic tastes. I'm pretty. I don't have severe emotional baggage and I deal with my problems pretty well. All of these are attractive to men, and they see me as the ideal women. I'm not perfect by any means. Nobody is. Perfect people are nothing more than idealisms in people's heads that no human will ever be able to live up to. The perfect Hatshepsut in these guys' heads is basically a guy friend with a vagina, and it sucks royally. One chump even said, "Wow, you're too cool to be a girl." Another guy said in a disappointed tone of voice, "Maybe you are like other girls," when I mentioned that I liked Hello Kitty. I smell latent homosexuality.
This has gotten me:
1) A more-than-fling, less-than-boyfriend who farted in front of me after sex (not just letting one rip, I'm talking about multiple times), ate in bed after sex, and even admitted that foreplay was too much work.
2) A boyfriend who couldn't be bothered to see get his erectile dysfunction treated or listen to my problems once in a blue moon.
3) A boyfriend who had no qualms about talking about his intentions to get back with his perfect ex while dating me.
And many other losers (to my credit, I did eventually kick them to the curb). In retrospect, I realize that I was seen as "easy." Not slutty easy, but zero maintenance easy. Basically, they see me as a guy friend with a vagina.
How do I make it known that I'm not a zero maintenance girl who is going to be happy and completely accepting of them?
Things I've been doing:
1) When a guy is first courting you, he'll inquire a bit to test the waters. He'll ask things like, "Do you like shopping?" "What do you do for fun?" In the past, I told them the truth (I don't like clothes shopping and only do it once or twice a year, but I love shopping at Fry's Electronics. For fun, I'm gaming, hanging out, or leisure learning), and I've found that this is a critical point in how much effort they're going to put into me, so I'll be sure not to seem so low maintenance in the future.
2) I make it clear that although I like gaming and stuff, I'm still a girl, so farting in front of me so casually is disgusting.
3) If a guy has a problem, I don't help him out unless he asks for help. My last ex had erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation, but wanted to "wait until things worked themselves out as they should." I researched the problem and its remedies, gave up foreplay, gave endless blowjobs, tried to make myself sexier, etc. It took my sanity. In retrospect, I should have let him take care of the problem and not let it become mine, leaving when I was being shafted too much. I'm not going to dedicate myself to futile causes.
4) Learning to either shit or get off the pot.
5) Learning to date men instead of boys, and I'm not dating geeks anymore. Yeah, geeks are smart and fun to hang out with, but they lack the maturity and real-world experience to have a relationship. Also, they can't admit that they're wrong, ever.
Also, do guys like tomboyish women? Like I said, I feel like guys see me as a guy with a vagina rather than a woman who happens to like computers and stuff.




It makes you overlook certain character flaws and bad behavior .
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