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Last edited by dreambig; 09-24-2008 at 04:52 PM.



I still don't see why some of you feel your family members need to know that you dance.
Don't tell them. If they find out deny it.
Family is the most important thing.....protect them.



I say just do what you want, when you want. I mean I don't think it would be necessary to make a big speech or write a letter to anyone saying "I don't want to talk to you anymore because...", but at the same time if you don't want to call, just don't. Or if they call you and you feel like answering, answer. If you don't, don't. It's never a good idea to burn bridges because you may change your mind one day or need them for something or just have a change of heart, but in my opinion this is a situation that can change over a period of days, weeks or years so why worry? Just do what you want.



Sorry, one other thing, to answer your question.
I feel you should talk to your family but do not bring up dancing. If they bring it up then ignore it and change the subject.
Thanks for the advice. He's the only one who knows, although my dad kind of guessed that I was doing it, but he never ever talked to me about it or tried to make me feel bad about it or anything.
I have a huge family but I only see them a few times a year. You're fine. That's the thing about family... you're generally stuck with them. You can have a fallout and not talk for years and then reconnect at a later time. Don't worry about it too much.
He was right on some level... this job is hard. He said it in an ignorant way, though. There are plenty of pretty girls who can't handle this job and MAINTAIN their dignity. That is why they stock shelves at Walmart.
If you think school is hard, try being stupid.
I believe that family is very important and you should try to stay close with them. You are an adult and shouldn't be treated like a child and reprimanded for the life style/profession choices you have decided to make. My immediate family all knows what I do for a living and don't give me any shit about it. Some of my family members I have choose to not include on my secret though and I feel like I do that for their well being. Some people just can't handle it. I would have a talk with your family member who gave you the hard time and let them know the pro and the cons of the business. Allow them to understand that your smart enough to work and save your money and actually have some goals. Let them know you love them and they need to accept your choices. Sometimes family is toxic though and you need to walk away. So give them a chance and do what's best for you!
I dunno I personally do not think that family is important , I think having people who care about you and that you consider family is important . Just because they have the same blood running through their veins as you do doesnt mean they were meant to be in your life . The ONLY family of mine that I have anything to do with is my mom and my daughter , the rest of them can kiss off , my brother , my father , my aunt (my moms sister) her whole family .......they suck and all for different reasons . They add NOTHING To my life and only take from it so ya know what ?? bye bye . That sucks what that guy is putting you through and you dont need it , make your own family and never let someone make you feel bad about the legal choices your making .......my brother does drugs and his GF beats their dogs but I am the asshole because I dont like her and I am a stripper ......ok , sure![]()
Visit me on myspace , Let me know if your from SW !!!!





Dreambig: do whatever makes you the happiest, whether for the next 10 minutes, 10 days, or ten years. It's as simple as this.
Really, it is.
Sindi I like that, it's true, not because they are family it makes them some kind of fantastic thing unless they really do mean something to you.
Protect them from what? Your bad, shameful job? I'm very sorry you feel that way about it. It must suck for you. I would only deny something I was shamed of. And, honestly, I try not to do things I'm ashamed of. Especially habitually.
I am as proud of my job as I would be of any occupation that I enjoy, am good at, and make great money doing.
I'm with Sindi--family is who you choose, not who you're "stuck with". Not all family is worthy of being chosen.
I am too, but when my family knew I danced it was awful for them. I wish I had never told them about it. My poor mom lost sleep at night and I know my dad did too. They really took it hard and it was a source of conflict for many years.
Now my mom knows I dance, but my dad doesn't. It just isn't worth going through all of that again for everyone to know. My family is precious to me and I know that my dancing hurt them. It doesn't make them bad people, judgmental, yes, but that's just how they are. I wouldn't trade them for anything.






I'm protecting my family from the stress, worry, and sleepless nights that I know they would go threw.
You can be proud of being a dancer without having to tell and discuss it with family.
I agree with you in regards to not all family is worthy of being chosen. I know certain family members on my mothers side I keep out of my life completely because I feel they are toxic. With that said, I think too many people today do not cherish family enough.





"Protecting" is what I say I do by not telling my family I dance. I'm not ashemed of my job in the slightest but my mom is very bible thumper-esque and I'm my daddy's perfect little angel. I really am, and want to stay that way. If I told them they would freak out and worry about me all the time. After my bro died my mom is really protective over me like I have to leave their house at a certain time so I'm not driving at night because it's more dangerous...stuff like that. Imagine the stress I'd put on them if I told them I drove over an hour home, alone, exhasted at wee hours of the morning...that's not even addressing the fact that I'm a stripper. I feel I should protect them from that. We have enough stresses in our lives why pile on more...?
OP I think you should just ignore any stripper comments you family makes. Eventually they should get the hint that it doesn't bother you and that they aren't going to make you feel bad about what you do so you'll change your mind. Hope things work out...
I hear what ya'll are saying--I really do. I guess I just wanted to give my folks more credit. My parents both thought that strip clubs were brothels and that "private dances" were just a euphemism for sex acts. Not that these things ocurred occasionally, but as a matter of course. They thought that strip clubs were dangerous awful places. But when they began to wonder about this new job I'd gotten that kept me out all night, I didn't lie. They were concerned, had a lot of questions, and ended up being kinda like, "You mean that's it? Huh. That's not so bad."
I guess I can relate to you all though, because my grandma does not and never will know. She could never possibly understand. I just knew my parents were hip enough to get with it eventually.
It was within the last year. People can still suprise you.





There are many stereotypes about the industry that I work in. Sometimes they can be true but human beings are very diverse creatures and cannot be pigeon-holed into one category.
Some of the most effortlessly beautiful, kind, intelligent, successful, motivated, driven and ridiculously hilarious women that I have ever met have been dancers. I've met the best friends that I've ever had in this industry.
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