
Originally Posted by
Morgan_TX
Wow. Jumping in late here...
We're talking about relationships here, and relationships ideally will take into consideration the needs and desires of both partners. When a dancer is dating someone who disapproves of her job, it's not about "right" and "wrong". It's simply that her job makes him uncomfortable. She can try to figure out why he's uncomfortable with it and educate him to alleviate his concerns. For instance, a lot of guys here have said that they would be fearful for her safety. Have him come into the club and meet the bouncers, and let the bouncers explain to him how they walk you out at the end of every night and take care of you if anything happens. Or perhaps he's nervous because he has this image in his mind of all strippers giving handjobs in the back room. Show him the kind of lapdance that you give.
If he simply doesn't like it, then you have the same choice as EVERY OTHER PERSON whose partner dislikes their job: ditch the partner or quit the job. This isn't unique to stripping, though. Some people hate their spouse's job because their spouse has to travel all the time. Some people hate their spouse's job because of their spouse's co-workers. Some people don't like their spouse's hours.
When I met my fiance, we met at a local coffeeshop. I tend to dress like a lot of strippers when I'm out and about, so I was all grunged up in my PJs and flip-flops with glasses and greasy hair when we met, but he knew through the grapevine that I was a stripper. He is NOT the type to go to stripclubs and had only been twice before he met me. When we started to get serious, I asked him if he had a problem with my job. He told me he didn't think so, because he understood that I treated it like a job. I invited him into the club a couple of times. Once was when I worked a very, very slow dayshift. I spent a few hours hanging out with him and having a few drinks because there was no other customer in the club, but it gave him a chance to see my stageshow, meet my co-workers, and familiarize himself with the layout and staff of the club. He was fine with that. Then I gave HIM a "standard" lapdance at home, and we talked about the fact that at work, I did that to other men. He was okay with that. Then I had him come in on a day when one of my best regulars was in. This regular had already met him (because I've done lunch with this guy a time or two) and was very laid-back. I gave the regular a lapdance while my FIANCE was watching, and then when I got home, we had a long talk about it. My fiance is now perfectly okay with my job. He's not the type to get jealous in any event, but now he KNOWS what happens at work, and he's fine with that.
My future-mother-in-law asked him one time if he ever worried for my safety. He said, "Mom, I've been to her club and met her managers and bouncers. I know nobody's going to hurt her and they keep a close eye on her. I'm more worried that she's going to bust her head open from falling off the pole or the stage!" (I'm clumsy.)
I know that I AM lucky. But if he had a problem with my dancing that couldn't be resolved by showing him the reality of the situation, then I'd have to choose between dancing and him. Part of being in a relationship is caring for the other person.
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