This is way harder than I thought it would be.I retired from dancing after a long 13 years.I just burned out totally.I was traveling 2 hrs each way to atlanta.I bought a house in macon so I chose to travel,after a couple of years I got an apartment and would just stay up there for 3 or 4 days or until I had my bill money.I had a hysterectomy about a year before I quit,and I really gained alot of weight so money wasn't that good anymore plus burning out,over the years I tried a couple of different biz. to make money after dancing but they didn't work out for one reason or another so..I left dancing with no back up.Broke. Except for buying a house I totally blew it all thinking okay I'll go back next week and make more money...ya know how that goes.I really felt like I had atleast a few more years to get it together...not.I really let myself down when I walked out all dramatic(after a slow day and a few cosmos) threw my shoes,dress,and garter in the trash and walked out.Yay for me right...yes and no. I did't work for a few mo. then I got a bartending job a a bikini bar.Got to look at it from the otherside.Girls were mean and cheap. I was always good to my bartenders.In atlanta they would have kicked my ass if I acted like those girls.Anyway,that lasted 11 mo. I sold ins. for 5 mo. spent more trying to sell than I ever made,then my latest job was the easter bunny for three weeks at the mall! I had some real thinking time inside that hidious suit! Didn't matter how much I used to make or how popular I was in the club,or even if I looked "pretty" that day.I was making 8.50 an hr. and glad to get that! I worked 59 hrs. each week for 450 bucks.Though that was bad but now I have no job! put in sooo many aps over the last few weeks.Every time I go out I wanna cry.My husband makes barely enough to cover the main bills,I've had to go to food banks and ask for help. no nails,no shopping,staying home every weekend,no vacations. My daughters sweet 16 id next month she wants to go to myrtle for a few days,don't know how I'm gonna pull that one off.We don't have cable,we live in the city so luckily I can get "free" signal for my p.c. I never knew it would be so hard!!!!!!!I just can't seem to get this flubber off,I've been walking and trying to watch what I eat,I soooo want to go back,I look way younger than I am and I think I can go back for a couple more years,I am really sick of being broke.So here goes ladies I'm gonna post my weight monthly.I am sickend by looking in the mirror! I am now 174 ! I am 5'3 and have d size implants so I look like a jelly bean! I just had to turn down a private party for people I danced for every year for 6 years.Dam I needed that money.Any encouragement would be great,I want to find a club with an open schedual,willing to drive up to four hrs. or maybe fly. I'm sure on of the local places will hire me sooner or later so I need the club to be flexable,I'm also gonna take classes online to get a degree for the next time I quit. any advice would help.Thanks for you time ladies.



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