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Thread: Single moms , who watches your kid when you go out ??

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    Featured Member Sindi's Avatar
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    Default Single moms , who watches your kid when you go out ??

    I have lots of questions in this genre ....I am a single mom but I dont go out and NO one has ever watched my kid for me . I live with my mom and I have been out maybe 5 times since my daughter was born 2yrs ago , my mom watched her then ........

    I cant on like that forever but I am so scared of putting her in child care and then I mean like the guilt I am feeling just thinking about putting her with a sitter so I can date ......

    I just want to talk to other single moms about it , i am not here to judge anyone , really I promise !!! I just dont know other single moms and I am really scared .

    I am about to be living on my own for pretty much the first time ever and I know that I am going to want a life

    I dont want my little girl to be harmed .....omg I cant even imagine , like that 10yr old that just gave birth .......help calm my nerves please !!!!!


    Also guys that ask me out dont seem to regard the fact that I am a mom ,they just think I can go out whenever and where ever .....they are always asking me what i am doing this weekend ...I like going to the zoo or doing laundry ......lol .....
    Visit me on myspace , Let me know if your from SW !!!!

  2. #2
    High_Heel_Lover
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    Default Re: Single moms , who watches your kid when you go out ??

    Deep breath in and out.

    Ok you need to read Protecting the gift, Keeping Children and Teenagers Safe (and Parents Sane)



    It goes in to a deep detailed way in interviewing child care providers. Trusting your gut is always important in these matters ok and interviews, references and calling and speaking to others who have used the services of a child care provider are crucial.

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    Veteran Member RC's Avatar
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    Default Re: Single moms , who watches your kid when you go out ??

    I'm no longer a single mom but when I was my younger brother watched my son.

    I'd recommend one of those drop in childcare places. They let you drop your child off without advanced notice and charge hourly. Check references from other parents, check the place out before you leave and make sure they're liscensed.

    Oh, and don't feel bad for wanting to go out on a date. It's normal, natural and in no way makes you a bad mommy! Everyone needs to get out once in a while!



    Quote Originally Posted by madmaxine View Post
    How to pick up a stripper- have a thick cock, don't talk too much, and fuck like Satan. That is all.

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    Default Re: Single moms , who watches your kid when you go out ??

    How old is your little girl?


    I am very lucky, my mother has always been available for me to babysit, like ALWAYS, and although she does things that gives me the shits I trust her to keep my baby safe.

    I started working p/t when my daughter was about 2, and by then she was a very articulate speaker, so I knew if anything was making her unhappy she could tell me about it. I put her in with a child carer that one of my friends sons went to, so she knew another kid there and I had good references. Then I put her into a bigger childcare centre where I got a good vibe off the staff and it seemed clean and safe, they had lots of safety measures that I approved of.

    You cannot be too careful though, and trust your instincts.

    You are not bad for wanting to go out and have a life.

    My first few dates were baby friendly ones anyway. If that person likes you then let them tag along on your trip to the zoo, or to the pool, or the park or whatever. They can just be a friend when you introduce them to your child and if there are good vibes then leave your kid at your mums with a video for a few hours and go out for a drink with them. (if that would be appropriate)

    I dont know maybe you dont like the idea of having too many strangers around your daughter. But I was definatly only interested in people who wanted to be part of my g rated life as well as having an adult relationship with me.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

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    Featured Member Sindi's Avatar
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    Default Re: Single moms , who watches your kid when you go out ??

    Awww thanks you guys ! Its so scary !!!

    I am just having such a bad week I dont even know what to say right now ....

    HHL , I love you !! Your are my sanity this week , i swear , thank you .


    RC, Thanks xoox

    Flick , she is two .....I like it when guys want to take me and her out , its nice . Some people have made me feel bad for it , like its not safe .

    This guy I was seeing he was so good with her and its nice for her to be around men , she doesnt have a dad or brothers or uncles ...ya know ?? She wouldnt know they were my BF .....at this age .

    I am gunna go check out that link , thanks again xoxo
    Visit me on myspace , Let me know if your from SW !!!!

  6. #6
    High_Heel_Lover
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    Default Re: Single moms , who watches your kid when you go out ??

    You are loved right back

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    Default Re: Single moms , who watches your kid when you go out ??

    Maybe you could arrange with one of your friend to swap babysitting. One night, you keep their child/ren and another night they can keep yours. It will both save you money and you know how they are from the beginning. You could do this with a cousin or other family member too.

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    Default Re: Single moms , who watches your kid when you go out ??

    Well I don't have kids but was put in daycare (from 5am-7pm They took me to school when I was school aged) every day but the weekends from when I was born until I was too old to be there any more at 10.

    It was fine. Was there days I didn't want to go, sure because my friends didn't happen to be there. Where there days when other kids hurt me, which would not have happened if I wasn't at day care, of coarse. I was even moved to another day care after the management went to crap.

    Over all it was fun though. Getting to play house (well more like Spice Girls) with the other kids, talent shows, field trips, tag, painting, making that putty stuff, stealing other kids brownies, playing on the computer, watching power rangers, taking naps, feeding fish, having water gun days, hitting boys in the balls, it was all tons of fun (I was an only child too so the interaction with other children was needed).

    I went to a big chain daycare so I didn't get any individualized attention like kids do at the smaller ones. I will put my child in day care, it builds character. You probably need a night watcher, in which case the kid is going to be asleep a lot anyways, but as long as they have fun stuff to do when awake don't worry so much about them. She'll have fun.

    This is just a random fact but:
    When you first leave her, after she starts to realize that she's actually going to get left she'll grab on to your leg and cry her little brains out. It's all a ploy though, so don't fall for it. She's trying to make you feel bad. You'll finally walk out the door and she'll muster up the saddest most "mommy doesn't love me face" she can and when you see it you'll walk back in that door and hug her again. Then you try to leave and she'll scream again. Rinse and repeat a million times un till the parents late for work. All the other kids will sit and stare and wait for you to FINALLY leave so they can tell the crying kid (who ALWAYS stops the second you actually leave) that they look like a loser, and that they lose play dough privileges for 5 minutes because they gave everyone headaches. The previously crying kid will say okay and go get a snack come back and start playing and not think about you again until a "my dad/mom is better that your dad/mom!" argument breaks out.

    All that said just to warn you. Don't be fooled. That happened 30 times a day every god damn day when I was in day care. And it goes down EXACTLY like that. I wish more parents knew just to walk away or you make it worse for EVERYONE. I remember telling a parent when I was like 5 to "GO TO WORK and she'll stop crying!!!!" ugh...okay, end rant!

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    Featured Member Sindi's Avatar
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    Default Re: Single moms , who watches your kid when you go out ??

    Quote Originally Posted by kryssy View Post
    Maybe you could arrange with one of your friend to swap babysitting. One night, you keep their child/ren and another night they can keep yours. It will both save you money and you know how they are from the beginning. You could do this with a cousin or other family member too.

    Assuming I have family or friends , which I dont ....not in Florida anyways
    Visit me on myspace , Let me know if your from SW !!!!

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    Featured Member Sindi's Avatar
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    Default Re: Single moms , who watches your kid when you go out ??

    Quote Originally Posted by Joplin View Post
    Well I don't have kids but was put in daycare (from 5am-7pm They took me to school when I was school aged) every day but the weekends from when I was born until I was too old to be there any more at 10.

    It was fine. Was there days I didn't want to go, sure because my friends didn't happen to be there. Where there days when other kids hurt me, which would not have happened if I wasn't at day care, of coarse. I was even moved to another day care after the management went to crap.

    Over all it was fun though. Getting to play house (well more like Spice Girls) with the other kids, talent shows, field trips, tag, painting, making that putty stuff, stealing other kids brownies, playing on the computer, watching power rangers, taking naps, feeding fish, having water gun days, hitting boys in the balls, it was all tons of fun (I was an only child too so the interaction with other children was needed).

    I went to a big chain daycare so I didn't get any individualized attention like kids do at the smaller ones. I will put my child in day care, it builds character. You probably need a night watcher, in which case the kid is going to be asleep a lot anyways, but as long as they have fun stuff to do when awake don't worry so much about them. She'll have fun.

    This is just a random fact but:
    When you first leave her, after she starts to realize that she's actually going to get left she'll grab on to your leg and cry her little brains out. It's all a ploy though, so don't fall for it. She's trying to make you feel bad. You'll finally walk out the door and she'll muster up the saddest most "mommy doesn't love me face" she can and when you see it you'll walk back in that door and hug her again. Then you try to leave and she'll scream again. Rinse and repeat a million times un till the parents late for work. All the other kids will sit and stare and wait for you to FINALLY leave so they can tell the crying kid (who ALWAYS stops the second you actually leave) that they look like a loser, and that they lose play dough privileges for 5 minutes because they gave everyone headaches. The previously crying kid will say okay and go get a snack come back and start playing and not think about you again until a "my dad/mom is better that your dad/mom!" argument breaks out.

    All that said just to warn you. Don't be fooled. That happened 30 times a day every god damn day when I was in day care. And it goes down EXACTLY like that. I wish more parents knew just to walk away or you make it worse for EVERYONE. I remember telling a parent when I was like 5 to "GO TO WORK and she'll stop crying!!!!" ugh...okay, end rant!
    Thanks , i really want to believe that ...when I leave her with my mom my baby still misses me the whole time . She asks for me and wont sleep .....maybe with other kids it will be different ??
    Visit me on myspace , Let me know if your from SW !!!!

  11. #11
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: Single moms , who watches your kid when you go out ??

    When my oldest was 2, I started her at an in-home, night childcare place, which was run by a single mom. The home was fully licensed as a day care and it was awesome. Eventually, the owner bought a duplex, knocked out a wall and lived on one side and had her business on the other, hired employees and converted to a 24 hour facility. This was especially helpful when I took on a full time day job and still stripped 2 nights a week.

    My daughter continued to go to this facility until she was 6 years old and we moved out of state. The owner and her daughter were like family to us.

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    Banned jasmine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Single moms , who watches your kid when you go out ??

    I'm not a single mom, but basically I just don't go out. We have no one near us to watch the kids. My parents are the only ones that I trust. Soooo I've been out 3 or 4 times since before my 4 yr old was born.

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