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Thread: combative customers

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    Featured Member xoxoGracexoxo's Avatar
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    Default combative customers

    Do you ever get this? Guys who act very interested in you but at the same time want to start some big confrontation over everything. Usually when guys accuse me of lying and just wanting money and all that nonsense, I know they're wasting my time, but sometimes I swear they're really into me and it seems like if I could just figure out the angle I could sell a dance.

    Last night, I notice this guy watching me on stage and walk over to him after I get off. He immediately says "Oh no, I've been watching you all night. I was hoping you wouldn't come over here, cause I know I can't resist you" blah blah blah. For a minute it seemed really promising, then he started asking "what my boyfriend thinks" and all that bullshit. I started being a smartass and next thing I know we're in this kind of subtle contest of the wills where he's clearly going to try to prove his superiority to me by NOT buying a dance from me. So I said goodnight and got up and left. But I was a little disappointed, cause I felt like I blew the sale.

    I'm just not sure what this kind of guy WANTS. Maybe this is the time to reeeeally play the Stupid Stripper card. It seemed like he really wanted to feel superior to someone. I should have just let him have it. My and my big dumb mouth.

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    Moderator charlie61's Avatar
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    Default Re: combative customers

    Yes--to me, this screams POWER TRIP.

    His Mission:

    Step 1: Get the stripper to talk to you, to take interest in you. Pretend to be wowed by her feminine charms, so she gets close and thinks she's about to get some $$.

    Step 2: Engage in conversation. Get her to open up.

    Step 3: Mindfuck her. Try to use the hole she gave you (accepting compliments, displaying interest) to get her to listen to your clever insults and passive aggressive life "advice."

    That's bullshit. I can smell these losers a mile away.

    Surely someone can hustle them, but not I!

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    Default Re: combative customers

    Sometimes I'll give it a quick big eyed 'time for me to get naked for you', but if they don't bite I run away. These are those guys who read those books and have a "method" etc.

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    Featured Member BrodieLux's Avatar
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    Default Re: combative customers

    Yeah these guys are pretty much the standard customer in Jersey. It sucks. I once saw Cameron post a good line to say when they accuse you of being after their money. You just reply, "And you only want me for my body. Let's trade!"
    Quote Originally Posted by CuriousSeeker View Post
    ^Pssssttttt, your stripper is showing.

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    Featured Member noelle's Avatar
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    Default Re: combative customers

    That's interesting you bring this up, as I rarely have issues with customers but last night this dude was just asking me a barrage of questions and getting whiney and pissy over everything I said! Totally not worth it to me to argue with some random. So, being the brat that I am, I rolled my eyes and stood up to walk away, and his friend was like "no, no, I want a dance"

    I don't understand why guys suddenly want to give you money when you act like you don't want or need it... but when you really need money, they can sense it and won't spend on you!
    Quote Originally Posted by lokikola View Post
    If success meant being savage my woes would disappear.

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    Featured Member vivianbear's Avatar
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    Default Re: combative customers

    These guys get under my skin so bad! I have a temper that I have to really try to control and these guys make me want to escalate so easy. When I see this conversation coming, I have to walk away immediately. I can't get fired every night!
    Btw, I don't think you blew the sale, Grace. This guy had no intentions of buying and was just trying to feed off your energy for free for as long as he could.
    "SS=stripper shit, in the same spectrum as CS=customer shit, which is within the spectrum of SaS=sales shit, which is all contained in the universe of BS=bullshit." -- Jay Zeno (mod)

    "Show me a hot chick and I'll show you someone who's tired of fucking her."






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    Featured Member xoxoGracexoxo's Avatar
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    Default Re: combative customers

    Quote Originally Posted by BrodieLux View Post
    Yeah these guys are pretty much the standard customer in Jersey. It sucks.
    Ouch. That's awful. Fortunately I don't have to deal with guys like this all that often, but when I do I'm always at a loss. I just have to get the hell out. Fortunately I didn't spend that much time with him last night, though more than I would've liked cause it was slow like molasses.

    I think the final straw was when he started launching into some bit about how hot girls don't like nice guys. I hate this line, and I said something to the effect that girls love nice guys, which is why all the nice guys were out getting laid that night. There was pretty much no going back from there. I should really learn to

    The point of no return for me with guys like this is always when I start to stand up for myself or state an opinion. Do you think if you just played completely dumb and flattered his ego he'd go for it?

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    Featured Member xoxoGracexoxo's Avatar
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    Default Re: combative customers

    Quote Originally Posted by vivianbear View Post
    I have a temper that I have to really try to control and these guys make me want to escalate so easy.
    Me too, girl. I have to really remind myself never to argue with a fool, cause I am way too easily drawn into pointless pissing contests if I let myself. Which I think is what certain guys want anyway. Like maybe they've given up hope of getting positive attention from a woman, so they just want attention of any kind.

    Which is real dumb, cause a strip club is the one place where you can positive attention from a woman for the low, low price of $20. Way to shoot yourself in your own foot, dude.

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    Featured Member CuriousSeeker's Avatar
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    Default Re: combative customers

    Quote Originally Posted by charlie61 View Post
    Step 3: Mindfuck her. Try to use the hole she gave you (accepting compliments, displaying interest) to get her to listen to your clever insults and passive aggressive life "advice."
    Strategies from the seduction communities and Mystery. Pretty readily transparent upfront, especially since those routines are so codified. I just visualize the show from VH1 and any compulsion I have to respond in kind, hustle, etc., vanishes since they're not going to spend anyhow or appreciate that I'm not looking to get laid by a customer. It helps if you go super sweet and super vacuous, as in too apparently clueless to get insulted or to play his power game. Your lack of hostility is definitely not what he wants and not what he's prepared for. Good to end with, "If you change your mind, I'd still love to dance for you." Huge smile as you're already turning and walking away. It helps if you can then talk to someone where he can see you and see that you weren't turned sour or angry and you're still on your game, as if he weren't even a blip on your radar.

    Of course, there are enough men with no game like this: they simply harbor hostilities toward women who need an outlet and want someone to abuse. Bouncer time!
    "Don't piss off a motivated stripper."


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    Featured Member xoxoGracexoxo's Avatar
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    Default Re: combative customers

    Quote Originally Posted by CuriousSeeker View Post
    Of course, there are enough men with no game like this: they simply harbor hostilities toward women who need an outlet and want someone to abuse. Bouncer time!
    Yeah, I think in this particular case it was natural-born jerkery. And in the realm of jerks, he was far from the worst I've ever met. It seemed like he wanted a) attention and b) a superiority boost -- a feeling of "winning."

    Once I got combative in-kind, it was hopeless, because "winning" for him became about refusing me money. I feel like there HAS to be a way to convince guys like this that winning = getting a dance from me -- I mean, it's true, right? $20 for me naked is a hell of a deal and I give a mind-blowing, attentive dance -- but I just can't quite put my finger on it.

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    Default Re: combative customers

    Quote Originally Posted by xoxoGracexoxo View Post
    Yeah, I think in this particular case it was natural-born jerkery. And in the realm of jerks, he was far from the worst I've ever met. It seemed like he wanted a) attention and b) a superiority boost -- a feeling of "winning."

    Once I got combative in-kind, it was hopeless, because "winning" for him became about refusing me money. I feel like there HAS to be a way to convince guys like this that winning = getting a dance from me -- I mean, it's true, right? $20 for me naked is a hell of a deal and I give a mind-blowing, attentive dance -- but I just can't quite put my finger on it.
    You can make it about his manliness if you want to (either by implying that some manlier guy over there wants your company, talking him like a toddler or just insulting his heterosexuality), but I still think this sort of guy is NOT worth it.

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    Featured Member AznExtasy's Avatar
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    Default Re: combative customers

    Don't give them the free stripper attention their power-tripping ego seeks. They deserve a kick to the nuts, nothing less.

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    Default Re: combative customers

    Fortunately I haven't run into too many guys like this but here's what I would've done. If you can sense that he's going to be a difficult customer, try to close the sale really fast, present a sense of urgency so that he doesn't have enough time to suck you in with his bullshit/insults. Press yourself really close to him, look into his eyes (or do something else equally intimate) and say something along the lines of "You're right - you can't resist me" literally take his hand and confidently lead him to the lap dance area "We're going here NOW." Don't hesitate. I swear, this works often! If he resists, just let him go and walk away, thus sparing yourself any emotional crap that you would've had to put up with by talking to him. Do not even try to reason with this type of man.

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    Featured Member xoxoGracexoxo's Avatar
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    Default Re: combative customers

    Quote Originally Posted by Elusive21 View Post
    If you can sense that he's going to be a difficult customer, try to close the sale really fast, present a sense of urgency so that he doesn't have enough time to suck you in with his bullshit/insults. Press yourself really close to him, look into his eyes (or do something else equally intimate) and say something along the lines of "You're right - you can't resist me" literally take his hand and confidently lead him to the lap dance area "We're going here NOW." Don't hesitate. I swear, this works often! If he resists, just let him go and walk away, thus sparing yourself any emotional crap that you would've had to put up with by talking to him. Do not even try to reason with this type of man.
    AWESOME! Thanks, Elusive.

    Yeah, I think this could've worked with this particular guy. It was just once we started talking that everything got weird so quickly. Lesson learned: talking to customers is a brain-killing waste of time. (OK, not really...but sometimes.)

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    Veteran Member KennedyWinters's Avatar
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    Default Re: combative customers

    I'm the same way with being all sassy back, even when I'm dead sober I can get a little mouthy. I think it comes from years of shyness and now like whoa, i'm a big important takes-clothes-off goddess kiss my feet or something.

    The best thing to do is to be very aware of your personal temperature. Like, how mad did the thing he just said get you? DId you feel a squirt of adrenaline? Take note of how things are making you feel and try to keep a lighthearted attitude.

    I try and practice this very healthy form of DENIAL where I ignore and filter through all bad things I hear from customers. I don't really answer questions that are clearly meant to be rhetorical. I sort of keep on a glassy smile, seeming a little distracted but still in a hot sexy and playful mood.

    Sometimes they will drop the whole act...but not always. I think about how when you are raising kids and they misbehave- before you scold or give a reaction, you IGNORE the bad behavior and look for something that they're doing right. Otherwise, the energy you expend responding back aggressively is just sucked up by him.

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    Default Re: combative customers

    oh, the superiority game...love it , not! I even have a male friend that still does that sometimes though I think he has a hormonal imbalance since he is fine for weeks and then bam!

    I would say "hey, my dog just died a couple of days ago so I really don't need this right now, ya know?" Feed shit with shit, I say.

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    God/dess Pretty_Penny's Avatar
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    Default Re: combative customers

    i have -zero- tolerance for these guys anymore.

    depending on what exactly they say, i have 2 responses

    #1 - MAYBE say something short in retort, and then walk away
    #2 - have them thrown out. (this happens maybe a couple times a year. it has to be pretty bad).

    so basically:

    i'm not playing your little game, you worthless, arrogant, insecure, douchebag.

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    Senior Member kat 3322's Avatar
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    Default Re: combative customers

    a sales book i read suggested asking combative customers why they dont want to buy before they say no. he's acting like a jerk and then you just cut him off and say "so why dont you want to get a dance" at this point if they want to keep "winning" they are gonna have to disagree with you and that means that youve turned the conversation. now he will have to defend why he does want a dance.

    i doubt it would always work but its better then nothing right?

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    Featured Member Perry's Avatar
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    Default Re: combative customers

    I freaking hate those guys. They're total douch bags. And it feels good to snip at them, but it feels way better to take all their money.

    I've had the guys whine, "This is all fake, I see right through it, blah, blah, blah." I just smile and go, "I know right! They make us wear sooo much make-up! I don't like it either." And the, "It's all about the money with you girls." "Huh? Not really. I used to deliver pizza - and I got lots of tips. That was cool, but I got lost all the time. This is more fun."

    Just play dumb, agree or look confused and in the end they think they win. After all, if there's no battle, there's no reason not to buy a dance. But they've lost all their money while you're counting it and giggling for real.

    ETA: Customers are there for a fantasy. If they want to feel smarter than a girl, that's fine with me just so long as they've got the money.

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    Default Re: combative customers

    I refuse to even get into it with those types anymore. I basically just keep it moving, next please!!! Anytime you spend with a time waster is exactly what it is, a waste of time and waste of time is lost money! There are just some customers that aren't sellable IMO, some are there for a free show or there to be rude to women. The moment you realize that, move along! I know it feels good to tell them off but then it can throw your good mood off, feed into exactly what they're wanting and most importantly, waste time=wasting money. Don't even give these PL's an extra free second, the large majority won't buy. For me, even if it's dead and I've approached everyone, I'd rather sit in the dressing room and read a book, manage my palm pilot, etc. I REFUSE to give anyone my time for free! My friend I work with have a slogan "Keep it moving...."
    Quote Originally Posted by Susan Wayward View Post
    I only get horny when I've tucked a few benjamins in my thong; it's a money fetish.."

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    Veteran Member ediblecrayonz's Avatar
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    Default Re: combative customers

    Be direct.

    "Well, it looks pretty busy in here honey, so do you want a dance? If not I've got to go make the rounds and check up on everyone else."

    Conversation is over, you either get a dance or move on.

  26. #22

    Default Re: combative customers

    customers who are confrontational and asking me personal questions right off the bat most likely are time wasters or really hard to deal with! Just pop them the question and sell, or move along. I got one of these type saturday night, he even tried to rip me off by saying he was going to the restroom and when i said I was going to go with him, he was like whatta you gonna do, see me pee or something. I was like, i need to go as well. when we were finally there, he was waiting for me to go in first, i guess so that he can take off, instead i told him to go and that i was gonna wait for him. it shouldn't be hard to sell to guys who like you and actually want to spend money on you. There will always be PLENTY of guys who are totally smitten by you, wants your attention, and wants it for free!

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    Default Re: combative customers

    Quote Originally Posted by BrodieLux View Post
    I once saw Cameron post a good line to say when they accuse you of being after their money. You just reply, "And you only want me for my body. Let's trade!"
    Right on! I'm loving it!







    Some Douchebag: "[Pimp C] 12:43 am: its true we got to stick together the black people on SW CK you is teh condoleeza of SW"


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    Default Re: combative customers

    I hate customers with a chip on their shoulder. I agree with what someone said earlier in the thread that they may be trying that mystery method of picking up women bullshit. Or they may just be assholes with a hostility towards women. Either way I dont give them my time for free. Although if the club is slow and I'm bored sometimes I knock a big chunk off their egos with my own mind fucking methods lol.
    Quote Originally Posted by Corgan View Post
    when regulars turn cheap, it's time to kill em off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lysondra View Post
    You're still a vagina.
    There are many stereotypes about the industry that I work in. Sometimes they can be true but human beings are very diverse creatures and cannot be pigeon-holed into one category.

    Some of the most effortlessly beautiful, kind, intelligent, successful, motivated, driven and ridiculously hilarious women that I have ever met have been dancers. I've met the best friends that I've ever had in this industry.

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    Veteran Member Oksana23's Avatar
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    Default Re: combative customers

    came across two of these time-wasters last night, this thread gave me some good advice on how to handle these morons in the future.
    Can't help it, I'm a born....[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

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