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Thread: Done. For real.

  1. #1
    Featured Member CherryBomb954's Avatar
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    Default Done. For real.

    Me and my husband had a long, heart to heart talk last night about everything, and the final conclusion was that I will not be dancing any more.

    The fucked up part is, even though I have no idea what I am gonna do for work next, I actually feel RELIEVED AND LIBERATED that I don't have to go back to the club.
    It was getting to the point where I would get sick to my stomach and on the verge of puking even thinking about walking back through those doors.
    Just knowing what I'd be facing.....the rude, broke customers, the constant sneering and hating from the other dancers, getting no tips or even being acknowledged on stage, fending off people trying to finger me, lick my nipples, touch my face......just....everything.
    And don't forget after putting up with all this, walking out with a less-than satisfactory amount of compensation.
    Last Friday I walked out with 8 DOLLARS. That is NOT acceptable. That's not even minimum wage, that's not even enough to survive on.
    Oh what's one bad night, right? No....this was happening all the time.

    I am not cut out for the business....I realize it and accept it. I just thank god it only took me a year to come to that conclusion and I didn't get "stuck" like so many people I know have. My husband has been very supportive of me the past year, but he said he just can't take it anymore. The coming home crying, being tired/hungover all the time, the way my self esteem suffers for days after some asshole picking apart my tattoo or the size of my breasts....
    More than anything, getting myself hyped up and thinking positive, all to be broke down.
    Think positive, think positive, think positive....it's your attitude....you need to smile....all pieces of advice I have recieved from not only SW but friends and co-workers. And I have followed, but unfortunately for this girl it hasn't done shit.
    For some of us, it takes a little more than just a positive attitude to succeed in stripping.
    I am just not emotionally, mentally, or physically able to do this job anymore.


    With that said, I give mad, mad props to you gals out there who are still pulling in a couple hundred to a grand a night, even through this bad economical time and the new breed of monsters (customers) it is creating.

  2. #2
    God/dess loveandluxury's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    Good for you for realizing that you're not happy and doing something about it and good for your husband for being so supportive. I really hope everything works out for you and you find something that makes you happy

    Animals are my friends, and I don't eat my friends.
    - George Bernard Shaw

  3. #3
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    K and I had this talk last night, and it looks like I'll be retiring by the end of the year, possibly by the end of the summer. He's had some excellent news on the job front, I'm getting to a good place in my writing, we've got a wedding coming up, and the timing is good. It really bums me out because I love stripping in Portland, I love the work and the environment and I love my main club... but it's just gotten too hard to make a living with the economy where it is, and yeah, too many of the customers are turning into monsters. It's about that time.

  4. #4
    Featured Member needtodance's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    GOod for you for doing what's best for yourself, at this moment! And yeah, i do kind of envy you for getting out of it.

    And Yek, if you dont NEED to do it for hte money, why can't you just dance once or twice a week at your home club for the fun of it?
    Quote Originally Posted by ExoticEngineer View Post
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    temporary abortions for everyone?

  5. #5
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    Well, right now I do NEED the money! So I'm hanging in there until we get it together. I'm looking for a permanent stable job, but I'm not optimistic of finding one in my field, and honestly writing is all I'm really good at. Besides, K travels so much for work and it sucks to be apart; if I'm writing for a living, I can travel with him.

    I might stay on for one or two shifts a week at my primarily-stage-only club, but I'm even getting cranky there nowadays because the customers are turning into cheap assholes. They don't have any money because of the economy and the price of gas and food, but they still want to see naked women and think I should just strip for free. Fuck a lot of that, I'm done.

  6. #6
    God/dess loveandluxury's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    I'm working towards being done too. I don't have a date or time frame set but lately I've just been getting that feeling that it's time to be done, or at least seriously move towards getting out.

    ETA: It looks like a lot of us are moving towards getting out as well.

    Animals are my friends, and I don't eat my friends.
    - George Bernard Shaw

  7. #7
    God/dess
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    these posts scare me. why is everyone done? i wouldnt be able to live on a "normal" job and its not bc i have a bunch of extravagant stuff. my rent is pretty high and i live alone.

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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    There seems to always be a trend in stripping. Right now for some it sucks balls all the way around so they feel the need to quit. Later, when the econemy gets better girls will flooding back to the clubs.

    I wish you luck in your new non-dancing life.
    you live like an ivy vine
    you can only survive by clinging onto trees
    that's your flaw
    put down some roots so you can stand on your own
    -Kenpachi



  9. #9
    God/dess loveandluxury's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    For me, it's just the shitty customers and I don't like to talk figures but a shit night used to be $350 for me, or that's at least the minimum I'd need to take home to feel okay. For the past month and some change, $300 has been a goal for me.. I haven't cleared over $350 in quite some time. Maybe I'll just take a break for a couple of months and wait until the economy is in a little better shape. It's just getting frustrating.

    Animals are my friends, and I don't eat my friends.
    - George Bernard Shaw

  10. #10
    God/dess anomar's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    Quote Originally Posted by britt244 View Post
    these posts scare me. why is everyone done? i wouldnt be able to live on a "normal" job and its not bc i have a bunch of extravagant stuff. my rent is pretty high and i live alone.
    It shouldn't scare you, britt! I think it's just being part of a community (like SW) for so long that you get to know people and notice when SWers transition into other things.

  11. #11
    God/dess holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    ^ yep. And everyone definitely isn't all leaving the profession. Just check out the Newbie section. There are new strippers being made every day .
    I'm confused, but the Chewbacca Truffle Shuffle cleared it up. - Emily

  12. #12
    Banned i.breathe.in's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    i love dancing, but if my boyfriend said that i could quit and he would help me out while i got other employment, i would consider it heavily.

    good for you for doing whats best for you

  13. #13
    God/dess
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    Quote Originally Posted by i.breathe.in View Post
    i love dancing, but if my boyfriend said that i could quit and he would help me out while i got other employment, i would consider it heavily.

    good for you for doing whats best for you
    mine wants me to move in with him and i know i wouldnt have to really worry about money. his ex wife said she was "too good to grind dick anymore" and he put up with that.. and he always mentions how if i moved in i wouldnt have to work so much. but i still dont want to stop. maybe if it was someone i actually wanted to live with that would be different...

  14. #14
    Banned i.breathe.in's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    yeah britt iw oudl still dance one night once in a while i really enjoy performing, so i dont know if i would want to phase it all out.

  15. #15
    God/dess loveandluxury's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    I actually think I may be okay dancing once or twice a month or something. Granted, I only do it once a week now but it's still wearing on me with the current economic state.

    Good luck to everybody wanting to get out.

    Animals are my friends, and I don't eat my friends.
    - George Bernard Shaw

  16. #16
    Banned i.breathe.in's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    thats the thing i still do just as well as i did a few years ago, but after 6 years in, my stamina sucks and im always so drained the next day and my feet feel like they are crumbling, lol

  17. #17
    Featured Member CherryBomb954's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    Yeah not everyone is getting out....like I said in my post I give mad props to those of you who are still banking, and never have any problems like I do with groping mofo's, having to drink to do the job, mad haters, etc.
    I wish I could be like alot of the girls on here, but I just can't

    I think it varies from city to city and state to state as well, how much money is being made. There are some places that still will always be more profitable than others, and Tucson isn't one of them (at least for me)

  18. #18
    God/dess loveandluxury's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    ^ Do you have any idea what you're going to try to do next?

    Animals are my friends, and I don't eat my friends.
    - George Bernard Shaw

  19. #19
    Featured Member CuriousSeeker's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    Congrats to you on starting a new chapter. I hope you'll remain part of this community though.
    "Don't piss off a motivated stripper."


  20. #20
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: Done. For real.



    Sad to hear it but I wish you the best. I slogged through several years of shitty clubs and cheap, abusive customers before I ended up working in the best region of the US (moneywise and customer-wise.) I do realize how tough it's gotten for most dancers in most places elsewhere....

    I don't know if it makes you feel better, but the street smarts gained from time as a dancer will be more valuable to you in perpetuity than any amount of financial gain from the industry. Keep that in mind.... .

  21. #21
    Featured Member CherryBomb954's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    Quote Originally Posted by loveandluxury View Post
    ^ Do you have any idea what you're going to try to do next?
    Anything! And I'll be so happy doing it. Minimum wage is so attractive to me right now. I haven't averaged minimum wage dancing the last 2 months.
    $6.75 an hour will be an UPGRADE as sad as it may sound.
    My good friend, and also new roommate, has some connections for me that we discussed tonight.
    I may have to get to work on a bike some days, but fuck it. At least I will not have to drink and take pills just to get the guts to go to work, and I can count on a steady paycheck, even though it may not be much, at least we can budget our expenses. Not to mention not having to get naked and fend off fingers wandering towards my glory hole.


    Quote Originally Posted by CuriousSeeker View Post
    Congrats to you on starting a new chapter. I hope you'll remain part of this community though.
    I will....
    Also I want to say that this thread is in NO WAY meant to be discouraging, negative, or an attempt to try to get girls to stop dancing. All I am doing is sharing my current situation, like many of us do with many things, and hence is the purpose of SW.
    That's why I keep repeating how much I give all you girls props who are still kicking ass in the biz.

  22. #22
    God/dess loveandluxury's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    I'm glad that you're going to do something that makes you happy. Good luck with your job search, keep us updated!

    Animals are my friends, and I don't eat my friends.
    - George Bernard Shaw

  23. #23
    Featured Member xoxoGracexoxo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    Quote Originally Posted by CherryBomb954 View Post
    Also I want to say that this thread is in NO WAY meant to be discouraging, negative, or an attempt to try to get girls to stop dancing. All I am doing is sharing my current situation, like many of us do with many things, and hence is the purpose of SW.
    That's why I keep repeating how much I give all you girls props who are still kicking ass in the biz.
    Dancing is not for everyone. I mean, no job is for everyone, right? And even if you love a job for a while, you may very well outgrow it one day -- lose interest, find that the rewards no longer outweigh the stresses, or just be drawn to something else.

    Obviously, girls who enjoy dancing are smart to do it. Girls who don't enjoy it anymore are smart to move on.

    There is no shame, for ANYONE, in moving on from something that isn't serving you anymore. Congratulations on realizing what you want and take steps to put yourself in a happier place!

  24. #24
    God/dess Andygirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    CherryBomb, it sounds like you are making the right decision. I'm glad quitting is an option for you.

    I'm really at my edge, but I have to stick it out a little longer. Luckily, it has been going well the last few shifts.

  25. #25
    AlexxaHex
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    Default Re: Done. For real.

    I'm getting near the end too. I just came to the realization after I thought I was quitting, that I have to keep dancing to supplement income until Jess is done with school. About another year of this and I will surely be ready to kill! lol
    I'm just in a totally different place in my head. It's not just the economy, but being a mother and wanting to be more domestic are my passions in life now. I know what it's like to feel forced into being there. It blows.

    I hope you find the peace and happiness you're looking for CherryBomb. A steady income will definitely provide more stability, and hopefully your marriage won't suffer anymore. Good luck!

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