I can't even describe how i feel right now. I just got back from my lessons for aerials. Harmony doesn't describe it, or elation, or anything. I'm covered in rope burns, i feel utterly mauled, and i'm completely addicted. We alternated between trapeze, rope, and silks.
I can't see myself doing anything else. Like I was sitting at the top of hte ropes, crying in happiness at the sheer rush and perfection of it.
I didn't do as well as I'd hoped, for a first time, but it really confirmed to me that #1. I do have potential at the higher quality acrobatics, and #2. FUck back to school, fuck expectations, If i could do nothing but dance, and dance in the air, till the day i keel over, I will feel fulfilled. There's none of the bittersweet passion I had for ballet, that i loved, despite knowing that I had a plateau, and no chance of a career in it. THere's none of the headstrong "i don't know anything but this" of music. There's no expectations, or limits, just me hanging in hte air, feeling the mathematics, and physics, and REALITY of that moment, and the symmetry of the poses.
I can't stop crying and gibbering, this is INSANE!




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