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Thread: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

  1. #1
    TheSexKitten
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    Default 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    Pretty funny article, from a pretty funny guy:

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    God/dess xdamage's Avatar
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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    I'm down with this, but to be honest, he overlooked some pretty obvious problem with Star Trek.

    Where is the Designer Eye Wear? I mean come on. Giordi is on the finest ship in the fleet and he is wearing no-name Glasses? (wait, what is the word for the harmonica he wears on his face?). Anyway, I don't buy it.

    Also they can make Data, but how come there are no hot Robot women? You really think a bunch of Engineers with this much capability wouldn't have invented hot Robot women by now? I don't think so.

    And finally... how come they still haven't found a cure for hair loss (*cough* Captain Picard)?

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    God/dess MrChristopher's Avatar
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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    I've thought of a few of those points before. Anyway, I always thought Giordi's Eyewear looked like an 80's banana clip. You know, one of these:

    http://us.st12.yimg.com/us.st.yimg.c...3_2003_2136642
    waffles are just pancakes with little squares on them.

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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    funny as hell... also has anyone noticed that on voyager, the severity of any situation can be exactly calculated by Janeway's hair? The more damaged the ship is, the messier her hair gets.. like you know things aint that bad if just one small strand is misplaced but if her bun falls out it'a hoooooly fuck abandon ship!

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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    Quote Originally Posted by MrChristopher View Post
    I've thought of a few of those points before. Anyway, I always thought Giordi's Eyewear looked like an 80's banana clip. You know, one of these:

    http://us.st12.yimg.com/us.st.yimg.c...3_2003_2136642
    I'll shamefully admit when I was a kid I taped one to my head and pretended to be an engineer

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    God/dess xdamage's Avatar
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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    I see a harmonica, but who knows... maybe in the future it's the fad. People are like, "OMG, that harmonica on your eyes just reeks of manliness, and it says so much about you that you don't need a designer label to be a cool guy."

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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    I always wondered how they ran out of anyting. They DO have replicators...

    Why didn't Voyager just reverse the polarity to the warp engines? They'd have been home in like a week. Just ask Geordi. Duh!

    Remember the scene from Spaceballs when Dark Helmet went flying because they stopped from "ludicrious speed?" How can they just stay all calm and not move when stopping from warp?



    I used to watch with my dad all the time. Since he died, I haven't been able to watch anymore. I used to look forward to Saturday and Wednesday nights when I was younger.
    "FUCK YOU ESURANCE. Really. Fuck you with something hard and sandpapery."-AlexxaHex

    "...you aren't killing the mood; you're still "naughty" and you're not ingesting your own feces. Everyone wins."-Jenny

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    Featured Member BrodieLux's Avatar
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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    OMG I was watching Next Generation tonite!
    Quote Originally Posted by CuriousSeeker View Post
    ^Pssssttttt, your stripper is showing.

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    Featured Member BrodieLux's Avatar
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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    The only one on that list that really resonates with me is Number Two:

    "2. The Holodeck.
    I mean, it's cool and all. But do you really believe that people would use it to re-create Sherlock Holmes mysteries and old-west saloons? Come on, we all know what the holodeck would be used for. And we also know what the worst job on the Enterprise would be: Having to squeegie the holodeck clean."
    Quote Originally Posted by CuriousSeeker View Post
    ^Pssssttttt, your stripper is showing.

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    Featured Member R-209's Avatar
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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    All the aliens look just like humans, except with different bumps on their heads.

    Why is the only lead character played by a black man (Sisko) also the only lead character ever to not be a captain? I know he got promoted a little later, but still...

    Why didn't Voyager head for the wormhole by DS9? Wouldn't that have cut their trip home in half?

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    God/dess CKXXX's Avatar
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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    Quote Originally Posted by xdamage View Post

    And finally... how come they still haven't found a cure for hair loss (*cough* Captain Picard)?
    I'm not huge on bald guys..but hey..Picard ROCKED the bald look!

    Quote Originally Posted by lexilou View Post
    "I'll picklepunch you in your twatwaffle!"

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    God/dess kitty260's Avatar
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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

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  13. #13
    God/dess kitty260's Avatar
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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    lol Kitty I love that you know what inertial dampeners are. I think we're officially geeks.

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    God/dess kitty260's Avatar
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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    Yay for dorks!

    THe Borg isn't really a robot, but there ARE plenty of robot chicks.

    And DS9 and TNG happen in different time periods, right? Maybe the wormhole wasn't known? And maybe they couldn't travel through them then?

    The door thing tickles me. Has anyone else seen/read Hitchhikers' Guide?

  17. #17
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    Quote Originally Posted by kitty260 View Post
    Seven of Nine is a cyborg. Does that count? She had a hot rack.
    Nope, doesn't count, she wasn't built by engineers for fun purposes. I've always wondered why a Borg would feel compelled to wear a spandex catsuit, makeup, and a vintage updo though.

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    God/dess kitty260's Avatar
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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

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    Banned Madcap's Avatar
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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    I'd be all over the holodeck. For just the reason the article states. My Holodeck program library would look like Larry Flynt's VHS/DVD collection.

  20. #20
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    I suppose. Just seems like she'd go with no makeup and her hair cut off or something. I can't think of any reason she would keep up with long, glossy hair. Also, how did she get such pretty highlights with no sunshine?

    Oh, and dude, I would just live in the Holodeck. They could TRY to get me out of there... just try! Big holographic dudes would keep them away while Ziyi Zhang and I would just roll, roll, roll in the hay...

  21. #21
    God/dess kitty260's Avatar
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  22. #22
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    LOL! That does sound like fun! But no, I don't think I'd do anything in the Holodeck except fuck.

    A lot.

    I mean a lot.

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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    Quote Originally Posted by Yekhefah View Post
    LOL! That does sound like fun! But no, I don't think I'd do anything in the Holodeck except fuck.

    A lot.

    I mean a lot.
    Don't let Yek lie. She'd use the Holodeck to modify the primary reaction module, so that it can work in conjunction with the shuttlecraft baseline polymer.

    She's such a card...

  24. #24
    God/dess kitty260's Avatar
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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

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    Default Re: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

    ^^

    I'd use the holodeck to romance Kitty260 with the safety protocols ON.

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