hmph. i felt lonely before because i'm not used to being so alone. my schedule is usually pretty jam packed. but i feel even more alone right now. a bunch of people from work are going to see tiesto tomorrow night in dc and i was supposed to go, but i know im not going to feel up to being out all night so i told the guy who was organizing it to give my spot to somebody who could enjoy it more. i cant change my mind tomorrow and decide i want to go because only 18 people can go since they have a private section and everything.
im depressed.. i was really looking forward to it. i just didnt think i'd be feeling so blah still.. its only been 5 days though so i guess i underestimated that. not to mention i have nothing cute to wear to cover the surgical bra, i have no clue how i'd do my hair bc it takes a while to blowdry, and i obviously would have to stay sober. why pay $100 for a section with drinks included when i can't drink, everyone else will be rolling or eating weed cookies or something.. that just wouldnt be fun for me.
but i was so excited about it. i think i'm going to go out to dinner with one of my friends and her daughter who i LOOOVE, because her husband is going to the club. my best friend is missing it too, bc shes leaving on vacation with her family after work tonight. so i wont be the only one not there.. it just sucks and im over emotional and i dont feel good and i need a hug.
sorry, i just needed to vent a little![]()



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and have a good time!
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im not giving them as much attention as they want, and my girl is good about curling up on my lap but the boy likes to sleep right up on my chest. i have to keep moving him back down, and he does not like that, lol.


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