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Thread: dumb customers..

  1. #1
    Senior Member xParisx's Avatar
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    Default dumb customers..

    a few of us girls have had this...we'd be standing round if it was quiet...and a customer would come up and say hi etc n then go "so what do you do here?" not being cheeky or anything but actually asking what my job was...whereas he'd get the reply "oh you kno, just going out clubbing like this"
    they'd give the once over and go "oh ok!" but then i'd correct them and say i work there where id get the reply "really??" with surprised look

    mind you, most times i'd be leaning against the bar sipping a champagne wearing a bikini top or bra with a tiny skirt and of course the heels...

    seriously, how dumb can you be??





    anyone else have any dumb customer stories??
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    well the most confusing guy i got (i posted about him here before), was a russian guy who spent an hour paying me trying to convince me he's FBI from NY, and when i sincerely seemed like i believed him, he spent the next hour trying to get me to fetch him cocaine, even though i SAID:
    1. i didnt have any
    2. i didn't know anyone who had any
    3. that's not allowed on so many levels
    4. and i was NEW. Like, first week new. Why would i jeopardize my job like that?
    5. wasn't he FBI anyway?

    So either he was really dumb, or he thought i was...

  3. #3
    Senior Member xParisx's Avatar
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    haha i've had guys go "come on, ur a stripper, u know where to get the drugs!!' and i have never and will never touch drugs..
    just proves they watch too many movies and actually believe thats how it is.
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    Featured Member glitzy's Avatar
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    i always get confused when customers ask if i "work here". and even more confused when i sarcastically reply "no, i just dress like this to come hang out" & they take me seriously.

    it happened to me twice last week. i guess people really are that dumb. or they were just trying to make conversation in the first place & then too scared to contest what i said lol

  5. #5
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    Quote Originally Posted by lilymiaomiao View Post
    well the most confusing guy i got (i posted about him here before), was a russian guy who spent an hour paying me trying to convince me he's FBI from NY, and when i sincerely seemed like i believed him, he spent the next hour trying to get me to fetch him cocaine, even though i SAID:
    1. i didnt have any
    2. i didn't know anyone who had any
    3. that's not allowed on so many levels
    4. and i was NEW. Like, first week new. Why would i jeopardize my job like that?
    5. wasn't he FBI anyway?

    So either he was really dumb, or he thought i was...
    I think some customers assume we're retarded Fembots. Guys love to pull those stories out of their asses on us.....the assumption is that women are ignorant of certain male dominated professional fields. (Ha.)

    As for the OP question, IMO men are sometimes afraid to state the obvious (seeing as women can be angered by certain statements at certain times.) Asking if we "work here" is a more indirect way of breaking the ice than "You must be a STRIPPUR.....U R nekkid."

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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    One time I felt really bad for a cumstomer because it just occured to me that he might actually be mentally challenged. I know, it was a really odd, complex feeling. Like, "can I be mad at this person? Can they help that they have a low IQ?" So I just smiled and nodded and removed myself as quickly as possible.

    but mostly I am flabbergasted (yes FLABBERGASTED) that people can be so stupid so I assume that they're messing with me then I suck it up. Then they take me to VIP. WTF?

  7. #7
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    I get that all the damn time. "So... do you dance here?" Um, no. I just go out to strip clubs in tons of makeup and platform heels and a slutty outfit to chat up strange men for the hell of it.

    Robin Williams was so right. Men were blessed with two brains, but only enough blood to work one at a time. It's amazing how stupid they get in the presence of attractive women.

  8. #8
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    Quote Originally Posted by Yekhefah View Post
    Robin Williams was so right. Men were blessed with two brains, but only enough blood to work one at a time. It's amazing how stupid they get in the presence of attractive women.
    An old-timer stripper (she started in the mid-1980s) gave me that piece of advice the first time we talked.....It's probably the most helpful thing you can remember about men in general. And customers especially.

  9. #9
    Featured Member CherryBomb954's Avatar
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    My most famous story related to this is......
    The one time an acquaintance of me and my husband's came in to the club I worked at. I was pretty buzzed, had been SUPER busy all night, the place was packed, I was just in that drunk/super money mode.....I saw him sitting by himself and went up with my best hustle. He allowed me to sit and get pretty thick into my stripper game before taking his glasses off and going "Umm...hey...by the way....don't you recognize me? I know your husband. What the fuck??"
    WHOAH, NELLY......I just at that second recognized him. I'd only met him maybe once before. I apologized and forgot about it, went on to hustling another dude and ended up back in the CR the rest of the night.
    SO the next day my husband gets a call from a friend who's friend with said acquaintance, and told to "watch out for your wife, she's probably fucking around on you"
    HA!
    When my husband asked why, he proceeded to tell him "Well, (guy's name) was at a night club last night, and she was there, fucked up and coming onto him pretty hard"
    My husband told him that there's no way that could be, cause I was at work the night before. He asked what club this supposedly was that the guy was at and he said "He was at Curves" (the club I used to work at)
    So then, my husband is like "Umm...dude, she works there....she was hustling him, it's her fucking job, she's a stripper
    DUH

    We ended up seeing said dude out a few weeks later, and he apologized to my husband then said he DIDN'T KNOW I WAS WORKING,DIDN'T KNOW I WAS A DANCER
    Hahaha! Never mind the fact I was wearing 6" stilettos, fishnets, and dancing on the stage. Fuckin' dumbass. I'm not sure if it was just pure dumbness or an ego so large that it blinded him to the obvious facts.

  10. #10
    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    Yeh some idiot asked me if I worked here one night. I said "no I just walk around the streets in my underwear".
    Quote Originally Posted by Corgan View Post
    when regulars turn cheap, it's time to kill em off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lysondra View Post
    You're still a vagina.
    There are many stereotypes about the industry that I work in. Sometimes they can be true but human beings are very diverse creatures and cannot be pigeon-holed into one category.

    Some of the most effortlessly beautiful, kind, intelligent, successful, motivated, driven and ridiculously hilarious women that I have ever met have been dancers. I've met the best friends that I've ever had in this industry.

  11. #11
    God/dess Susan-Va's Avatar
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    I get "do you work here" a lot, I give pretty much the same answer as everyone else on that one.

    One of my favorite stupid custy moments was when I was on stage dancing and dude at the rail called me over to him and asked for a beer, he thought I was a waitress.

  12. #12
    Featured Member Perry's Avatar
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    I get, "What else do you do?" every freaking day. Like I need another job, and if I did, I'd really tell him so he can come harras me while I'm making tacos.

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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    Of course, this one night, after persuasion from my really goofy manager, I nnspent the entire night walking around in clear heels and a sky blue cape dress. I actually made pretty good money that night. Taking off my dress would reveal my full slip, and then taking that off got me down to white panties and bra, and then I'd finally take off the bra. The guys actually kind of liked it, but they all said they couldn't believe I was "working" there!

    For reference, this is a cape dress picture:

    http://www.candleonthehill.net/store...Fcategory%3D10

  14. #14
    Senior Member Vesper's Avatar
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    Great idea! There could be theme nights like "Amish-girls get undressed"

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    Featured Member glitzy's Avatar
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    [quote=morgantx;1603629]Of course, this one night, after persuasion from my really goofy manager, I nnspent the entire night walking around in clear heels and a sky blue cape dress. I actually made pretty good money that night.


    dude, you're my hero!
    i often wear weird ass shit just to see what happens when i'm not making money & dig on a lot of non-traditional stripperwear. sometimes the results are surprising...



    haha probably would work well in utah or other areas with an extremely high mormon population...

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    Featured Member glitzy's Avatar
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    sorry meant to quote that first bit ^^^^ but i am an idiot & don't know how...

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    Featured Member thechaosfairy's Avatar
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    CherryBomb, you win the thread. Holy fuck. I can't believe he decided you were just randomly into him. WTF?

    Glad your husband isn't a jealous insano, too. I'm pretty sure there are some guys out there who would just fall down the well of dumb with their buddies, and decide that your hustling "meant something".

    morgantx -- that's a really cool gimmick. I'd try it if the people around here were more uptight. Portland is seriously lacking in virgin/whore complex (which I do appreciate, as it makes my daily life easier: I can just TELL people I'm a stripper and they go "oh yeah, so's my next-door neighbor.")
    Quote Originally Posted by red red red View Post
    Like super-fast, frenetic, chipmunklike stylized humping with this look on her face like "Kill! Kill!"
    Quote Originally Posted by iseestars View Post
    i think people like going to parties and clubs and looking like douchebags.

  18. #18
    God/dess ViolaStrings's Avatar
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    Sometimes I think guys this dumb aren't dumb. They're trolling for hookers or bar sluts. Some girls that come to my cub practically dress like strippers.

  19. #19
    God/dess greenidlady1's Avatar
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    I think some guys just don't know what to say.

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    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    Quote Originally Posted by Perry View Post
    I get, "What else do you do?" every freaking day. Like I need another job, and if I did, I'd really tell him so he can come harras me while I'm making tacos.
    LOL thats funny.
    One night a guy asked my friend and I what else we do and we said "why would we need to do anything else?" and he said "well i dunno you might work in a chicken shop or something" LOL. Now it's an ongoing joke between us when we are having a slow night that we better go work at the chicken shop.
    Quote Originally Posted by Corgan View Post
    when regulars turn cheap, it's time to kill em off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lysondra View Post
    You're still a vagina.
    There are many stereotypes about the industry that I work in. Sometimes they can be true but human beings are very diverse creatures and cannot be pigeon-holed into one category.

    Some of the most effortlessly beautiful, kind, intelligent, successful, motivated, driven and ridiculously hilarious women that I have ever met have been dancers. I've met the best friends that I've ever had in this industry.

  21. #21
    Featured Member Ava Jadore's Avatar
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    Me and a couple of other girls got this one night...they actually thought we were just hanging out in skimpy ass lingere. I thought they must be joking but they were dead serious. It is sort of a running joke now. I will run up to one of the girls and say "excuse me...do you work here" LOL!
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    Veteran Member MysteriousMisty's Avatar
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    I'm so glad this thread was made! I've had my share of idiots that asked if I work in the club. But one of the dumbest customers I've ever encountered was a local who acted as though he was doing me a favor by bringing in his co-workers just to drink. He wanted to go out with me but was actually stupid enough to think buying beer and not tipping was cool. His friends would tip some of the girls on stage but he just sat there drinking. Most guys get the hint when you don't return their phone calls. This fool called for over a month even though I never went out with him and never returned his calls.

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    God/dess Lysondra's Avatar
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    Quote Originally Posted by Perry View Post
    I get, "What else do you do?" every freaking day. Like I need another job, and if I did, I'd really tell him so he can come harras me while I'm making tacos.

    This is my favourite. "I make a hundred grand a year working three days a week, you think I need another fucking job?!" Especially since I do Private Parties, told the guy I had 6 that night and he just handed me $375. Like, dude, maths. Hello.

    My favourite was when I was selling bikini raffles. Bikini. Raffle tickets in hand, "Oh WOW, you dress like that to the PUB?!" No, douchebag, I'm working. Buy a ticket.


    Look like a woman
    Think like a man
    Act like a lady
    Work like a dog

    - My Great Grandmother Bessie's Recipe for Success

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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    I don't think that "what else do you do?" is a dumb question at all. When you are making great money, it has to be a means to an end. The men see the means and they are wondering what is the end. We aren't just stripping all day everyday and accumulating a huge savings account for no reason. Some of us are students, mothers, supporting a hobby (for me it's piano), ect.

  25. #25
    God/dess Lysondra's Avatar
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    Default Re: dumb customers..

    Quote Originally Posted by NewMoon View Post
    I don't think that "what else do you do?" is a dumb question at all. When you are making great money, it has to be a means to an end. The men see the means and they are wondering what is the end. We aren't just stripping all day everyday and accumulating a huge savings account for no reason. Some of us are students, mothers, supporting a hobby (for me it's piano), ect.

    Yeah but I've had this come from the last guy at the end of a 30 hour workday (not often but I've worked some) and he's said that. Like dude, I work 30 hours straight and you wanna know where I'm working after this??!


    Look like a woman
    Think like a man
    Act like a lady
    Work like a dog

    - My Great Grandmother Bessie's Recipe for Success

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