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Thread: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relationship

  1. #26
    Veteran Member azdd's Avatar
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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    Mr TenPercent - Before you slide too far down this slippery slope, recognize that you came here asking for honest advice, and you're getting it! You seem like a decent sort, but you should read the following excellent article before proceeding:

    http://www.identitytheory.com/insight/bruns9.html
    Last edited by azdd; 07-06-2008 at 06:48 AM. Reason: replaced text with link

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    Veteran Member azdd's Avatar
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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    Oh yeah, tell me what kind of guitar you play, and who your three favorite blues guitarists are, and your best riff, and it will help me decide if I believe you....

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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    Quote Originally Posted by azdd View Post
    ..............a bunch of crazy bullshit
    Why are we allowing this on the pink side? If this guy wants to spew his misogynistic bullshit, let him do it on blue with the other PL's. Seriously.

    Where are the mods when they are actually needed?

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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    Quote Originally Posted by Andygirl View Post
    Why are we allowing this on the pink side? If this guy wants to spew his misogynistic bullshit, let him do it on blue with the other PL's. Seriously.

    Where are the mods when they are actually needed?
    I agree, did you report the post?

    signed,
    another PL...
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

  5. #30
    Banned All Good Things's Avatar
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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    ^ It's been around forever. Written by a guy with a vivid imagination or more likely one who is still furiously bitter from having been dragged out kicking and screaming and left at the curb.

    I've dated plenty of civilian chicks who were far more batshit crazy than any dancer I've dated.

    Oh, he left out the most important line that would be the closest to the truth: "The dancer is probably smarter than you."

  6. #31
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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    Okay guys, I'm gonna try to answer the posts before getting to my message.

    WiseGuy_Tx:
    1. I am only unemployed in the sense that I don't have a 9-5 job. I make my own hours and work at my leisure. I have full health and dental insurance, thanks.
    2. I'm not a "wanna-be" in any sense of the word. I haven't even explored the idea of joining a band until I get over my stage fright. Maybe I should take Mitch Hedberg's route and wear colored aviators to hide from the crowd?
    3. I'll take the occasional bong hit, but I don't spend money on drugs. I hardly even keep booze in my apartment.
    4. I wouldn't call myself a liar/cheat/abuser, I try to follow the golden rule in life and not fuck with people. It makes it easier on everyone.

    Sveta:
    I don't know why there are so many naysayers posting in here. I guess I should be a little more understanding of this because of the cliquish attitude internet forums tend to take on. No offense, but I guess one just has to earn accreditation and respect amongst strangers here just like in real life.

    BrodieLux: Thanks again, I appreciate your input the most along with Yoda's.

    fancygirl: I guess not, I haven't been here too long or looked at too many posts.

    azdd: That article you quoted seems like it was written by my friend who got led on by a girl. The guy seems very jaded, but I don't think a lot of that applies to my girl. As far as my guitar: It's a Gibson ES-339 Semi-hollow body that was given to me as a birthday present. My favorite blues artists are Hendrix, Muddy Waters and Clapton. As for my "best riff", I don't think I could name a favorite, and message boards aren't exactly easy when it comes to writing out tabs.

    I don't think any of the other posts were directed at me, so I'll just ignore them for now.


    As for my conversation with Tonya (that's her real name, not her stage name). I did what you guys suggested and just let it all out. I warned her in the beginning that if something bothered her, she didn't have to answer it, but that this was all just new territory for me in the dating scene and that I wanted to get some of my questions/troubles out of the way so we could move past her being a stripper.

    Most of the question/answering went on without a hitch. I guess there is a bouncer watching the private dance area all the time, so that makes me feel better about her safety and guys grabbing at her when they shouldn't be. The only "problem" I guess I had was when we started talking about the champagne room/vip area. I just have to trust her and be understanding of what she does. And I do trust her. She said she doesn't even like her customers enough to do anything sexual with them. That was a little awkward to talk about, but she said she was waiting for the questions to pop up and we just had to establish our trust. It's gotta work both ways, y'know?

    I even told her for the nights she stays over my place or the nights I stay over her place that I'll run a bath for her when she gets home from work. I normally don't fall asleep until 4 AM anyway, so it's not a hassle for me and would give her somewhere to relax after she gets home. So that took care of my whole being "grossed out" over her coming home after rolling around on a dirty stage with strange old men pawing at her all night long.

    So everything is all cool. She's going to ask her manager about the CD idea tonight, he wasn't at the club last night.

    My friend's band didn't get to play on the roof because of rain We had to do it indoors and the city's fireworks even got canceled because of the goddamned rain!!!

    I still don't know why you guys would think I would go to all this trouble to make this up when I just wanted to get some questions asked. I wasn't trying to get anything except some help and answers here and you all (the haters) think I have some kind of ulterior motive. But like I said before, I guess some kind of trust/respect has to build up here just like in a real-life setting.

    Thanks again guys.

  7. #32
    God/dess doc-catfish's Avatar
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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    Something tells me the OP has been here before under another handle, or maybe this soap opera of a topic has just gotten that damned redundant.
    Former SCJ now in rehab.

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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    deleted.
    Last edited by Brendita; 10-13-2008 at 02:48 AM.

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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    TenPercent, I was casually digesting your posts until the remark about your dancer friend rolling around on a dirty stage with "strange old men pawing her". I hope you realize that was an ageist remark. I am old but I only paw strippers in VIP not on a public stage for a couple of bucks and certainly not on a dirty one. To allude otherwise if very offensive to me and I am sure to the other customers here who are middle aged.

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

  10. #35
    Featured Member Sveta's Avatar
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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    Quote Originally Posted by FBR View Post
    I am old but I only paw strippers in VIP


    What kind of club is the OP going to where men (of any age) are pawing at dancers onstage? Every club I've worked in would kick a guy out for trying to cop a feel onstage.

  11. #36
    God/dess shasta's Avatar
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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    This story sounds so made up. Like you dreamt it.

  12. #37
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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    Quote Originally Posted by Sveta View Post


    What kind of club is the OP going to where men (of any age) are pawing at dancers onstage? Every club I've worked in would kick a guy out for trying to cop a feel onstage.
    Boy you must never have worked in St. Louis (Illinois side) then. Stage=gropapalooza.....as a matter of course, initiated by the dancers.

    To the OP, you gotta recognize that a fundamental disconnect is that while you may find strippers (and dating strippers) fascinating and worthy of 10,000 questions, most of the population of this site does not, because they ARE strippers. In fact, probably the two MOST boring categories for the girls here are:

    1. Strippers
    2. Dating strippers

    Talking about funny stories from the job itself, or the money, or techniques, or frustrations, or silly customers, or great customers, or shoes, or stripper gear, or 1,000 other things, are more interesting to the girls than just talking about "what strange creatures strippers are...what should I say not to offend one....how to act when dating one?....does bright daylight startle them?"

    Best just to handle that area yourself and give it a whirl.

  13. #38
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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    deleted.
    Last edited by Brendita; 10-13-2008 at 02:47 AM.

  14. #39
    Moderator charlie61's Avatar
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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    I hesitate even saying this, so please don't jump on me: I'm not trying to suck up to anyone...

    But it seems like we're being pretty bitchy to the OP. Just reading through that thread made me cringe a little bit. We sound like a high school clique! And this isn't the first time I've noticed this in SW.

    But back to the thread complaint-- I mean...it's not like his question is perverse or involves requests for us to disclose the 'stripper secrets' out there or anything crazy. He had a simple question that wasn't even overtly sexual. Where's the harm in responding as if this were a real dilemma? The OP clearly has some misguided thoughts about strip clubs (possibly as a result of his limited experience in them), but this isn't a reason to totally turn on him. Now, if he were asking shit like "Is it true that strippers always fuck people in VIP rooms?" that might be a bit intolerable. But he isn't.

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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    Quote Originally Posted by Brendita View Post
    haha, this made me think of how all the strippers scatter at work, whenever anybody opens the back door and lets the sun in. At which point I always laugh and make some joke about vampires to whoever I am sitting with.
    Well of course Brendita, we all know that strippers, like vampires, are creatures of the night. Even those who must work in the day have the benefit of working in a club that looks absolutely the same as it does at night...no hint that it's daytime. And when they tan, it's in a tanning bed or booth, not the sun.

    And to get to and from said club, day strippers must all wear the regulation stripper/vampire sweats and hoody, to make sure they are protected from the sun at all times. Apparently, though, the only part of a stripper's body that can take full sunlight is the tops of the feet, because flip-flops are also standard issue.

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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    ^^charlie you really are a kind soul. I hope you take up for me sometime

    I don't think anyone has been mean to the OP...just a lot of honest questions or responses.

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

  17. #42
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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    deleted.
    Last edited by Brendita; 10-13-2008 at 02:48 AM.

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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    This thread is awesome in many ways.

    OP : If you're being serious, then... yeah. You may be able to "date" a stripper. I dont know your level of self esteem, self confidence, trust, etc... I know that as much as I love my girlfriend, if she was a stripper, I'd have difficulty putting what I KNOW happens there out of my mind. *shrug*. If she's a cool chick, though, why not? The worst that can happen is you get a "Yeah, I dated a stripper once" story.

    To the guy who posted the rant and raving anti stripper post : That may actually be true for some girls, but not all. It's a bad stereotype and you probably shouldn't post shit like that on a message board frequented by dancers, eh?

  19. #44
    Veteran Member golden41's Avatar
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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    After reading 10percent post I wonder if the dancer of his dreams really has any idea what she is getting herself into. Maybe your much more charming in person?

    I want someone with more time on her hand to make a "warning" artlicle to strippers who are trying out dating one of the PLs for the first time.The begining is probably as good as its gonna get.

  20. #45
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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    Quote Originally Posted by Brendita View Post
    DAMN IT, I screwed up! Sweats and a hoodie? Nah, actually I see more strippers dressed to the nines to come to work than I ever see in hoodies.
    Well maybe this is a regional thing. I know you've seen way more than I have, but I've seen literally 100s of girls coming onto shift or leaving work in various St. Louis clubs, > 90% of them in some version of sweats/jeans/sweatshirt/flipflops. AND, exactly 0% (not one, not once, ever) "dressed to the nines."

    Oh well.

  21. #46
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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    Wow I wish I had my own band to dance to.

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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    ^^Yeah, when will some guy become so interested in me that he offers to play his guitar/kazoo/recorder/tambourine for me when I'm on stage? I need to step up my fucking game or something.

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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    ^I'll come play my air guitar for you Ginger!!!!!!!!

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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    ^^^Only if you can play 'Stairway to Heaven'. Otherwise I'm turning this whole concept into a reality show to be aired on VH1 or something like that.

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    Default Re: Playing dancing music for a dancer I met..and questions about a possible relation

    Ten,

    Sorry haven't posted much, just wanted to give my 5 cents (no 2 cent in Oz).

    Everyman's attitude is probably like 90% of the guys that go to the club and probably what would turn off most girls from ever seeing them outside the club.

    I suggest just be her friend and see where it goes from there.

    The main problem I see is your weird attitude to her dancing. I mean if you do go out with her will you be able to listen to about her horrid day at the club. Or if you go into to see her in the club could you handle her hustling the custies for dances. The one thing you will have to get your head around is that it is a job, when she's in the club she an exotic dancer, the fantasy of all guys in the club. But if she's like most dancers once she leaves the club, she leaves the exotic dancer behind and becomes her own person.

    The other situation that will be difficult if you go out with her will be the attitude of your friends. Girls sometimes react negatively knowing she is a dancer as they think of all the Bucks party stories and don't realize its just a job. Male friends hear your dating a Stripper and they think about all those fantasies they've had about dating a stripper. But in reality thats not the case. I work with computers and once I leave work I want to leave that behind. Its the same with most dancers I would think.

    But if you do go into the club, just remember it's a job and while your there just remember your just another customer. I mean how would you feel, if a girl came into your work and tried to make out with you while you tried to work. Also other crusties will see this and assume that they entitled to do the same or even more, which makes her job even harder.

    I would just suggest be her friend and see where it goes from there and remember she is unique and not just a stripper.

    Johnny R

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