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Thread: My mom hates my job

  1. #1
    Veteran Member jessica_rabbit's Avatar
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    Default My mom hates my job

    This is just a rant. I've been a stripper for 8 years. I like it. If I never had to get a "normal" job I wouldn't. I have a college degree and probably could get a job that my parents could be proud of. But I just. Don't. Want. To. And this is starting to cause a huge riff between me and my mom. Of course she wants what's best for me. I don't even blame her for what she's saying. She's probably right. I would probably be better off in the long run to get a nice corporate job with benefits.

    My life is pretty much a mess right now and all she wants is for me to get it together and be normal. After the collapse of my LTR with the man I thought I would marry, I find myself trapped in a little nothing of a town. Not literally trapped of course, I could leave anytime, but I've formed a deep attachment to my ex's son (who still basically lives with me) and if I left I would be leaving him essentially. It's complicated and there's no sense going into the backstory, but suffice it to say that I'd rather sever my own arm off than leave this child.

    Jobs in this area are hard to come by, good jobs even harder. Worse, I would have a 45 min+ commute. So my options are limited. And stripping enables me to do so much of what I want to do right now. Not to mention I truly enjoy it. But I feel as though I'm sacrificing my future. I want a good husband and children of my own. I want a nice home and vacations and a happy family.

    My mother is convinced that I'm destroying my chances for any of this by remaining a stripper. Normally I would disagree and tell her to mind her own business. But I'm feeling so vulnerable right now and starting to think that maybe she has a point. After all, my major life decisions thus far have lead to a pretty dismal outcome. I'm heartbroken, stuck in a shitty town, a disappointment to my family, and my future looks pretty bleak.

    I don't know what to do. I hate hearing the same thing over and over again. "It's time to grow up and get a real job". "You'll never get anywhere in life as a stripper." "Don't ruin your future. Someday it will be too late for you and you'll regret it." "Don't you want to find a good man?" "You have a college degree and you're wasting it." And on and on and on ad nauseum.

    And the worst part is I'm starting to worry that she's right.

  2. #2
    God/dess Susan-Va's Avatar
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    Default Re: My mom hates my job

    Your future is what you make it. Even if you're stuck in a shitty little town.

    There's no reason why you can't have what you want and be a stripper too. You can have a husband, family, nice home, vacations. I never would have met my husband if I hadn't been dancing (9 years together). There are other's who have done it too with great success.

    You definitely seem to have a lot on your plate, maybe a break and a bit of me time is needed.

    Stripping is a real job, it's not a waste of time unless you make it. You can be smart and building for your future while dancing.

    Keep your chin up girl!

  3. #3
    LoveComesFromWithin
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    Default Re: My mom hates my job

    well maybe they want you to have a backup plan incase anthing goes wrong. good luck with your family. Family is tough.

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    Default Re: My mom hates my job

    Sorry if this sounds critical but I believe every stripper needs an exit plan. That exit plan may be a new job or may be retiring at 40 with a enough money in the bank to live happily ever after. What is your exit plan? Keep in mind that huge blanks on resumes are difficult to account for though you may be able to use the child as a reason.....

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    God/dess Susan-Va's Avatar
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    Default Re: My mom hates my job

    Quote Originally Posted by NewMoon View Post
    Sorry if this sounds critical but I believe every stripper needs an exit plan. That exit plan may be a new job or may be retiring at 40 with a enough money in the bank to live happily ever after. What is your exit plan? Keep in mind that huge blanks on resumes are difficult to account for though you may be able to use the child as a reason.....
    Definitely have an exit plan. I've decided to retire form dancing at the end of the month. Financially I admit I could have been smarter but I really want to get out of the business. I'm sending out resumes and I haven't had a job in 7 years. I'm just gonna tell prospective employers that after I got laid off my husband was making enough to support us but now I'm ready to get back in the work force!

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    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: My mom hates my job

    I agree with the exit plan. But as for your mum not liking your job, well she doesn't have to do it. You have to live your life for you and not other people. Keep dancing until you no longer want to.
    Quote Originally Posted by Corgan View Post
    when regulars turn cheap, it's time to kill em off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lysondra View Post
    You're still a vagina.
    There are many stereotypes about the industry that I work in. Sometimes they can be true but human beings are very diverse creatures and cannot be pigeon-holed into one category.

    Some of the most effortlessly beautiful, kind, intelligent, successful, motivated, driven and ridiculously hilarious women that I have ever met have been dancers. I've met the best friends that I've ever had in this industry.

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    God/dess ExoticEngineer's Avatar
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    Default Re: My mom hates my job

    Jessica, keep your chin up hun.

    I had a conversation with my little sister a while ago, she was going on and on about how stripping is such a temp thing, and how it's not good for future planning, what if I broke my ankle, what if I had something disfiguring happen?

    I said "Maybe you're right, maybe I should just go back into modeling" She of course says "Yes! There you go, do that!" Well, little miss, modeling, stripping, using my looks and sexuality to make money...right? What's the difference?

    My point is Jessica, a job is a job. You get paid. Yes some jobs come with benefits and insurance, etc. But if you work at it, and play this game smart you can afford all of that on your own. Yes, even today.
    So you work hard, you save your money, be smart about it. Even at a "regular" job you can screw it up and piss your money away, you don't have to be a stripper to perform that act.

    BUT, do have a contingency plan, a "just in case" plan. Any person who uses an asset that can be lost should have one. Athletes, models, strippers...hope I'm making sense here. Do you think your mother would feel better about your choice if you took some steps to protect your future? Created a savings account? Developed a plan for "what if"? Showed that you are responsible enough to think long term and still enjoy your work? And take care of yourself so that you can do this job for as long as you want. Athletes and models train, work out regularly, eat well, get lots of sleep, take care of their bodies (well, they all should be doing this) and you are no different. Just because it involves your tits and not a basket ball or a camera, doesn't change how you need to treat the job.

    Those are just some of my thoughts, good luck to you.




  8. #8
    Veteran Member jessica_rabbit's Avatar
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    Default Re: My mom hates my job

    Thanks everyone for the support. She is driving me crazy!!! She really likes to lay the guilt on thick. Now I remember why I only visit a few times a year.

    The thing is, I have an emergency fund to cover 6 months of expenses in case something happens AND I contribute monthly to a retirement fund. I have health insurance too. I know that I'm doing everything "right", but I can't convince her of that. She's too concerned with what other people think and how I will find a good husband.

    I just can't wait to get back home to my regular life. Family can really suck sometimes.

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